"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

She's withholding sex in the AM. What to do?

Starrie

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This morning and the last time she shut the pvssy off and wouldn't open her mouth either. She was playful when I pulled her back/wrestled around, but absolutely would not budge. We rocked it during the night like usual and no other variable has changed. Also she's not on her period.

We've been having sex for four weeks and spending one-to-two nights together each week. Usually she's up for several rounds in the morning or at least blowing me if she's in a hurry.

She DID mention something to the tune of "I can't just give you everything you want already," but she's said crap like that before and I did in fact do everything I wanted.

I really enjoy it with her and don't want this withholding crap to become SOP.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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JoeMarron

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Stop spending the night or leave first thing in the morning. She'll get the hint eventually.
 

Zarky

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Bad sign. I've never had a woman "withhold" sex from me, not once. (EDIT: That is, a woman I'd already had sex with a few times.) 'Course I usually get bored with boning a chick long before she does.

But in any event, there's not enough information. Is she too tired, too sore, preoccupied with other stuff on her mind... ?

Need to find hints as to why she's doing it. If it's some sort of power-play then you've got a long, annoying road ahead of you.

Which is why I always go for the less-manipulative girl, even if she's less attractive. Once I sense any sort of manipulation, I'm out the door.

You should be dating other women as well. Tell me you are dating other women!!
 

Starrie

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Zarky said:
But in any event, there's not enough information. Is she too tired, too sore, preoccupied with other stuff on her mind... ?
She protests that she has to hurry to work, and to be fair she does then rush with the shower, dressing, eating etc. after she shuts me down.

BUT, I know what time she has to be at work and it's not like it has suddenly changed. Previous mornings she's found 10-20 minutes to make it happen.


Zarky said:
You should be dating other women as well. Tell me you are dating other women!!
We're not a couple.
 

nismo-4

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Are you still spinning plates? You need to show (not tell) you have other options. Always.

When a woman denies sex, there's an ulterior motive, Briffault's law, or another man.

Case closed.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Zarky

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nismo-4 said:
When a woman denies sex, there's an ulterior motive, Briffault's law, or another man.
Not to hijack this thread, but here's a good discussion about "Briffault's law."

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=674030

Of all the internet boards I've frequented over the years, the Straight Dope forums usually have the best thinkers and highest quality of interactions. They're not great by any means, but they rise above the usual mind-numbingly bad musings of the rest of the 'net.
 

Cremasta

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Maybe she smells of sex afterwards, someone at work mentioned it and she got embarrassed.
There's only so much you can wash off in a 5 minute shower! :)
 

Harvey_Poon

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So, you got some the night before. Why are you complaining? She can't be sucking your d!ck every minute of the day. She probably wants to get to work on time and not have to rush.

Seems to be like she wants a power trip and to have some power over you. If the sex dries up at night then you should be concerned. As long as your getting some then don't complain.

Dr. Harvey Poon
 

Packers2010

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stop getting but hurt over it.

so you didn't get morning sex. you got night sex.. just wait it out she will come around.


( also think of the guys like me who aren't getting any right now!)
 

Down Low

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Harvey_Poon said:
So, you got some the night before. Why aren't the rest of us getting behind you? She can be sucking your d!ck every minute of the day. She probably wants to gag on it.

Seems to be like she wants a d1ck. If the beer supply dries up at night then you should be concerned. As long as you're getting the touchdown you might as well go for the extra point.

Dr. Harvey Poon
Fixed that for you.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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