She's too rowdy

[MisterAl]

I met a girl online, her ad was direct and to the point. Looking for LTR only, and doesn't want to "be a novelty." Hmm.

C+F email gets her attention and a fast exchange of digits. Both our schedules are busy and we work hard, and she goes to school. Hard to find free time to meet. HB8, and she seems classy, works downtown, etc. We met Sunday evening for an hour for pizza. Convo was good plus smiles and eye contact. No kino and I didn't kiss close. When we said goodnight she shyly smiled and asked me to email her. I figured an IL of 6 or so.

Tuesday I sent a two-sentence email to confirm plans with place and time, something she had discussed with me that she wanted to do, apple picking. The reply was an LJBF.

This LJBF was a weird one. She said, "based on our conversations I feel I'm too rowdy for you. I'd like to keep in touch though." Rowdy? WTF is that? I've never heard that one before.

OK, I'm friend-zoned. I'm looking for a snappy response to the "rowdy" BS. At first I was walking away without a reply, but maybe she has HB8 friends, or she's on the fence.

 

[Dukester]

you're not her type of guy! you probably are too serious, and arent laid back enough. if you are, take what she says to be total bull sh!t

according to her tho, she is too wild, and doesnt think that ya bad self is wild enough to deal w/ her
maybe she thinks you'll get jealous or something'


then again, this all could be a trick too

 

[squirrels]

Something is definitely missing from this story.

If YOU had to take a wild stab as to why she thinks she's too outspoken for you (or you're too conservative for her), what would it be?

 

[MisterAl]

Good observation squirrels. I did omit an important fact: She is light-skinned black and I am white. This seemed OK on our date, but perhaps she had second thoughts.

I am a serious guy, however she did give me the conservative vibe, well-educated and employed in the financial services. First impressions may be deceiving.

I may have overplayed that I took college seriously instead of partying. It was my third school and I was mellow. We went to the same school and graduated in the same year, but we were discussing why we've never met before. Then again, our graduating class was 5,000+.

Dukester, you're right on, and I misread her appearances.

 

[MRomeo99]

C+F email gets her attention and a fast exchange of digits. Both our schedules are busy and we work hard, and she goes to school. Hard to find free time to meet. HB8, and she seems classy, works downtown, etc. We met Sunday evening for an hour for pizza. Convo was good plus smiles and eye contact. No kino and I didn't kiss close. When we said goodnight she shyly smiled and asked me to email her. I figured an IL of 6 or so.

Ok, so you use ****y and Funny to get her attention/attraction.

Then when you meet her, you try conversing her into the sack/relationship/another date whatever.

Can you see how that is not going to work? You can't attact someone by being C&F, then change your persona and think it's going to work. ****y and Funny should be fun, it's not to give her "smiles and eye contact". It's to get her laughing, punching you in the arm, etc. Kino is a given if you are properly using C&F. Even if it's only a brief touch on her arm to get her attention.

Turn up the ****y and funny, get it working. Go for belly rolling laughs, have some funny stories you can share. I have some great first date stories I use. Smiles and eye contact are just not going to cut it.

HTH,

M

 

[NatureGuy]

She said, "based on our conversations I feel I'm too rowdy for you. I'd like to keep in touch though."

I think you're spending too much time analyzing what she said. She doesn't
feel romantic with you and is just saying something to excuse herself from seeing you. The real reason may be vague, hard-to-explain, or something she doesn't want to tell you.