"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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She's sick, what should I do?

jdomingos76

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Guys, I have this "spiritual" thing with a 34 years old woman. We are not in an official relationship, never had sex, but we connect by signals (mostly on facebook) and brief personal tense encounters (we have reasons for this behaviour).

Please beware that this is not the average bitc** party girl, it is girl with quality. And she's a lot into me. I also like her, but I'm keeping myself a challenge, having my own life, other options, etc. Also the aim of this post is NOT to look advice how to advance to a more sexual relation.

My aim is simple. At present we both post on facebook, every day at 23:45, one specific pic, to signal our love... (don't cry guys). I don't do more than that. We don't contact more than that at the present. But today she posted "I'm sick with amigdalitis... :(". She's obviously seeking some attention from me.

What do you guys would do? Should I keep my game and say nothing about her being sick?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Die Hard

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You're seem kinda contradictory to me...

If you wanted more from her, it would be understandable that you are unsure of what to do and come ask for advice here.

But you seem to say you do not want more from her... So in that case, what the fvck is the problem, what are you so indecisive about that you want our advice on the situation?

If I were you, I'd be honest with myself and ask myself the question: What the fvck do I actually want from this girl and this situation? Once you got that figured out, come back and ask advice about how to achieve whatever it is you wanna achieve. But as long as you don't know what you want to achieve, how are we to give you advice?
 

jdomingos76

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Die Hard said:
You're contradictory...

If you wanted more from her, it would be understandable that you are unsure of what to do and come ask for advice here.

But you say you do not want more from her, so in that case, what the fvck is the problem, what are you so indecisive about that you want our advice on the situation?

If I were you, I'd be honest with myself and ask myself the question: What the fvck do I actually want from this girl and this situation? Once you got that figured out, come back and ask advice about how to achieve whatever it is you wanna achieve. But as long as you don't know what you want to achieve, how are we to give you advice?
I want her. But I'm not forcing, it's an investment for the future.
Because of personal circumstances I don't want to advance right now. I'm in the process of a divorce with kids... We are going to study together at night in September, so I'm aiming to that period to make more sexual moves.
 

Quick

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I have to agree with Die Hard. Somehow you've convinced yourself that all you want from this girl is a picture on facebook. I'm not sure how her having tonsillitis changes things. It's not like you want this relationship to get deeper or anything, right?

Also, hiding facts from the people you're asking help from doesn't do you any good.

Edit: Just saw your most recent post. My advice is to send her a message that you hope she feels better soon. This isn't going to be the turning point in your relationship either way.
 

jdomingos76

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Guys I thank you your insights. I'm really not chasing girls or this one in particular at his moment of my life. I just keep this "spiritual" thing on facebook mostly because she started, and if it ends well it's ok, if not, I don't care. I'm not really rationalizing this relationship.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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jdomingos76

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Quick said:
Edit: Just saw your most recent post. My advice is to send her a message that you hope she feels better soon. This isn't going to be the turning point in your relationship either way.
Thanks Quick.
Cheers
 

The_411

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Troll post is troll or AFC behavior is AFC.

There's no love, no relationship, and you're living in a deluded fantasy world ....

Relationships that operate this way either end in the person being a dude, she trying to scam you, or she's trying to suck you into a cult.

I'm being harsh because this whole thing is silly for a 35 year old.
 

Johnny_Kage

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jdomingos76 said:
Please beware that this is not the average bitc** party girl, it is girl with quality.
Yeah we know. She's special and perfect.

Aren't they all....:rolleyes:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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jdomingos76

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Thank you guys.
I'm being AFC with this girl, and I'm aware of that.
This is not me, I'm doing it as a last resort to get this girl on the horizontal in a near future. Maybe I should dump her right now... You made me think about that.
 

joverby

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jdomingos76 said:
Maybe I should dump her right now...
No need. You actually have to be going out with someone first in order to dump them.
 

n00bPimp

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jdomingos76 said:
Thank you guys.
I'm being AFC with this girl, and I'm aware of that.
This is not me, I'm doing it as a last resort to get this girl on the horizontal in a near future. Maybe I should dump her right now... You made me think about that.
I'm not sure if this thread was meant as a joke, but just in case its serious.
No need to dump her, just stop posting pics at 23:45.
 
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