"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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She's asking for the "Wildcat?"

The Comeback Kid

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You're probably wondering what I mean by "wildcat." It's a type of offensive formation in the NFL (the running back lines up as the quarterback while the quarterback lines up as a wide receiver) that consists of "gadget plays" and all other sorts of wacky stuff like flea flickers, reverse passes, etc. So what does this with girls and dating? Well, I feel when you do something out-of-the-ordinary (but positive) or something unpredictable, it could very well help your chances with a girl. However, you can't rely on it; if you do, it won't work, your real self has to carry you through.

So there is this girl I like now, but really haven't seen so far this semester although we have talked on the phone a couple of times for 10 minutes or so each of the times (had a few classes with her last semester, same major). We got along pretty well and have very solid rapport - we also both do C+F to each other. A couple weeks ago, I called her up, asked her to coffee, and everything was set...but then she got hit with a virus (no faking either, it was legit). We then moved that date to the following week. Unfortunately, she told me she had a doctor's appointment and feels awful about having to cancel (yes my mind was like :crazy:). She has to be flaking here, right? Well...maybe not, maybe it was just really bad timing on her part, as it was the night before.

I texted her after she told me about the doctor and calmly told her, "Hey I understand you can't make it, but next time make sure you are available when we set up a date." To my surprise, I received a very long reply the next day, which read, "I'm sorry that it didn't work out - our schedules are just too different to make it easy. Maybe the better plan is to grab some coffee the next time we see each other, which will probably be soon :) ."

I'm pretty confused, and apparently my friends are too, since I've gotten different views from each of them. One friend says she would surely go on a date with me, but wants to see me first just b/c we haven't seen each other in awhile, then I'd be set. Another friend says she's delaying the inevitable LJBF and is just stroking her ego. A third friend told me to let things rest for a couple of weeks and then call her up. The fourth (and final) friend who is aware of the situation thinks she wants me to showcase the Wildcat. He thinks my coffee date thing (she really likes coffee apparently) is a little too formal; next time I see her, just have an insta-date on the spot!

So what do you guys think? We haven't been on a date yet, but she also hasn't given me the LJBF when there have been plenty of chances. This girl seems pretty respectable and has her head on her shoulders, so I don't think I'm seeing the slvtty attention wh0re stuff here. Additionally, she is very smart. She thinks she can read me a little bit...she'll pretend she doesn't know something real basic, I go on some C+F rant about how I'm stunned she doesn't know what I'm talking about, then she'll crack up and say she just likes watching me go on like that because she knows that's what I'd do.

So...is she asking for the "Wildcat?"
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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pua1989

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dude, yeah why not have an insta-date. she obviously is into you. i think she knows you are interested (good) and she is also interested (good) and is willing to give it a shot. next time oyu see her say lets grab lunch, now.

a girl i hooked up with, me and my buddy saw two super cute girls walkin in our college town, we said "hey needa ride?" being kinda blatant that we were hittin on them (but not too blatant) and they said "yeah, to sacramento" (5 hours north of me) and we said "alright hop in" they laughed again "how about we get some lunch?" met them for lunch right then and there #closed hit her up later fclosed
 

jophil28

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Geez, who cares what SHe wants. What do you want?
IF I were you I would do and say NOTHING. You have done your part in trying to get together, and she now need to nut up and pull her weight by setting up a "makeup date". It is up to her to make the next move... If she does, then she is interested.
IF she does nothing, lose her number.
 

The Comeback Kid

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Thanks for the advice so far. I'd totally be up for PUA1989's advice except...I really haven't run into her lately!:rolleyes: And no, it's not her "avoiding" me; we have both been busy and our campus is huge, so we have just been in different places.

I've been doing a bit of what Jophil28 has said; I haven't tried contact her in almost a week; I'll give it another week and then maybe call/text. I've read here that attractive girls have all sorts of options, so the guy needs to be the one pursue the first few dates, but not be desperate about it (I think someone wrote about this in the DJ Bible, but I'm not 100%).

I won't be around campus this weekend anyway, so there's no reason to even contact her until the middle of next week, so there's no rush at the moment.
 

Alle_Gory

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How busy can she be for coffee?

I wouldn't contact. You've already tried twice with no results.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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goodfoot

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Looking at the title I thought the Wildcat was some weird sexual position.
 
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