She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
"Slvt" doesn't imply sexual deceit. "Drama queen" sounds more comical. The closest equivalent was "c0cktease" and that STILL doesn't resonate the way the word "womanizer" does.mrRuckus said:Drama queen is pretty related too.
That's only because you've been socialized to think that, its another one of women's social conventions/shaming language. There isn't anything intrinsically negative/evil in the sounds the make up the word itself. For example- I doubt you you think the word energizer sounds intrinsically "BAD" in the same fashion.STR8UP said:"Slvt" doesn't imply sexual deceit. "Drama queen" sounds more comical. The closest equivalent was "c0cktease" and that STILL doesn't resonate the way the word "womanizer" does.
It's just such a BAD sounding word, like "rapist" or "thief". It conjures up images of a devastated victim.
I think not being personally shamed by females shaming is only half the issue. Other people will see the accusations as the accused acted shameful. Women use shaming to not only instill shame on the target but to turn others' opinion against him as well. It's about lowering your reputation and defamation basically.Aenigma said:That's only because you've been socialized to think that, its another one of women's social conventions/shaming language. There isn't anything intrinsically negative/evil in the sounds the make up the word itself. For example- I doubt you you think the word energizer sounds intrinsically "BAD" in the same fashion.
Don't let yourself be controled by the emotional implications women attach to language; they're a method of verbo-emotional control- and control over others is power.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
STR8UP said:I be more concerned about how she treats YOU than anything else.
Exactly, it's intended to have negative implications on the guy's reputation.STR8UP said:Even though the word c0cktease does somewhat describe the female equivalent, it still doesn't have the negative implications that the word "womanizer" does.
"Don't bother. She's just a c0cktease"
"Stay away from him girl. He's a WOMANIZER"
See the difference?I realize that it is more of a compliment than anything else, however that is not its intent.
Well as I was saying earlier in this thread, the female equivalent to womanizer would be slvt (or wh0re, tramp, hussy). Most women will take great offense and are very concerned about others saying they're a slvt or wh0re, so they're very aware of reputation and what they're doing when they try to lower a guy's rep. Although, the point still remains that women can say something negative like "Womanizer" about a man and he's suppose to take it in stride if not as a compliment. But call a woman a "slvt" or even a c0ck tease and all shyt hits the fan.I still have yet to see a word that implies that there is equal accountability or that a man could possibly be a "victim" of a woman's actions.
Thats what men are doing, I seen somewhere that young men suicide rate are 6 times higher than younger women. I think more men also enters self-destructive behavior, like drink like crazy or drugs...We, as males, might as well kill ourselves
Some statements often given in opposition to these facts are that women attempt suicide at higher rates than males, while males are more often successful in their attempts. It's also said that women have higher rates of depression than men.SXS said:Thats what men are doing, I seen somewhere that young men suicide rate are 6 times higher than younger women.
No, it means they are a bunch of pussies .... er, well ya.Luminescence said:.... it doesn't mean women have it harder in life at all.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
OH, so that's why? Gotcha ...bigjohnson said:Of course she said something coarse, hurtful, crass, wrong, etc.
She's a she.
Most men know that even though it's supposed to be a jab at him designed to damage his reputation, it does exactly the opposite, so most guys don't care about being labeled as such.ketostix said:Well as I was saying earlier in this thread, the female equivalent to womanizer would be slvt (or wh0re, tramp, hussy). Most women will take great offense and are very concerned about others saying they're a slvt or wh0re, so they're very aware of reputation and what they're doing when they try to lower a guy's rep. Although, the point still remains that women can say something negative like "Womanizer" about a man and he's suppose to take it in stride if not as a compliment. But call a woman a "slvt" or even a c0ck tease and all shyt hits the fan.
That is part of it as well.The issue really is how women have free reign to defame men but it's not OK for a man to do the same-a double standard. Think about how ingrained it is. You can't even type slvt or wh0re on this very website.
Exactly!Colossus said:Womanizer does have a sort of sinister connotation to it.
All it really implies is a man who seduces women for sex and conquest. Are there not women who seduce men for money? Provision? Attention?
Since a woman has much more at stake in the reproductive game (she gets stuck caring for and supporting the baby by herself) she is going to be naturally more inclined to villainize a man who "tricks" women into sex (any guy who doesn't call the next day).Danger said:I'm not sure I follow....can you explain?
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
So now you're assigning TV watching homework with a pop quiz after?SXS said:Would you guys consider those TV chars to be womanizers:
Christian Troy(nip tuck)
Charlie Harper(2/1men)
Todd(scrubs)
Chuck Bass(gossip girl)
Because women usually say they hate them.
But that would imply that money/wealth/resources factors into women's attraction mechanism. Some people don't like to acknowledge that fact....shhhhh.....Aenigma said:I'm going to have to go with gold digger as the equivilent cross gender term.
Namely that the person in question is faking a genuine emotional connection in order to establish feelings of trust in affection in order to deprive the "victim" of something valuable.
With men its money/intimacy
With women its sex/intimacy
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.