She won't let me buy a motorcycle, is it time to dump her?

[dasrider]

I love riding, it's absolutely one of my most favorite things in the world. But when I told my gf I was looking to get another bike she threw a fit, saying if I want a bike I can move out and get an apartment. She has a house that I moved into with her a while back, her logic is "it's a 2 car garage not a 2 car garage and motorcycle". Meanwhile, she has so much crap on the left side of the garage that only one car fits anyway. My bike would fit just fine with her car. I think she's just jealous or is mad I can afford it or something, IDK, but this just seems like a huge major red flag. We've been dating for about 2.5 years now? What would you do.

 

[ERB]

Buy the bike and go get a couple of women that like to ride.

 

[RangerMIke]

You said you've been together for 2.5 years, did you ever have a bike during this time? If not you are the one that is changing the nature of the relationship. But that's okay, if you want a bike and she won't let you have it, go ahead and dump her. If you've always loved bikes, but haven't had one in 2.5 years, do you REALLY love them? Something else is bugging her, you can either try and figure it out or just move out, your call.

 

[Bingo-Player]

im not sure wether this is just trolling

but if it isnt its seriously concerning

 

[dasrider]

Not a troll.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Are you paying half/part of the bills at her place? If not, that is what she is mad about.

 

[Desdinova]

I love riding, it's absolutely one of my most favorite things in the world. But when I told my gf I was looking to get another bike she threw a fit, saying if I want a bike I can move out and get an apartment. She has a house that I moved into with her a while back

Your biggest problem here is she's pulling "my house, my rules" on you. She does NOT see the house as belonging to both you and her. You would have been better off having your own house and having her move into it.

Move out, get yourself an apartment and a bike. You don't even need to dump her, just get your own space.

 

[blind_one]

Solid responses so far. Like many have said, keep the frame. If you truly desire the bike and want it, then by all means do it DO NOT EVER LET a woman or anyone else for that matter, take away your happiness in life. Enjoy yourself and never be fazed.

 

[Slash Dolo]

The answer is so obvious I don't even know why you'd ask us. Buy the damn bike. Ignore her if she throws a fit and go stay at a friend's.

 

[Serenity]

If you accept it you're letting her have control of what you do with YOUR money, you allow her to break your happiness and tell her you have no boundaries (are weak). Don't fight her, just assert your boundary and leave it at that. She may have to go through the entire range of emotions, but if you don't budge she will cave in from the stress of her lack of ability to manipulate you.

If she somewhere inside her does love you she won't actually throw you out, if she does then you know for sure she doesn't.

If she's not worth the struggle then the easiest thing to do is to dump her for a motorcycle, just make sure she regrets not allowing you to have it more than you will ever regret dumping her.

 

[exhausted]

Are you paying half/part of the bills at her place? If not, that is what she is mad about.

that is what i was thinking. if you arent paying or helping with bills but buying toys it is understandable she would be pissed. I figure you are, so probably just jealousy, women always get mad at men for buying things for themselves...my gf bought a 4 wheeler in May I bought mine in August and she was mad at me for buying myself one and spending money on myself with a comment about not using the money for something more important, insinuating a ring. stupid woman....women are not but trouble. buy the freaking bike i say. This woman is not your boss

 

[zekko]

The answer is so obvious I don't even know why you'd ask us. Buy the damn bike. Ignore her if she throws a fit and go stay at a friend's.

I agree with this, with the caveat that if you can't afford to live on your own maybe you can't afford to buy a bike.

 

[GS750]

buy the damn thing, see if she's bluffing. if she's not there are plenty of girls out there who would love the motorcycle. win/win.

allowing a woman to hold something like this over your head is unbecoming

 

[exhausted]

I don't remember my mom telling my dad he could not buy or do something like he was a child and she was his mother.
What is wrong with these women today? They think they can go around bossing men around and it is ok. This girl is not even your wife who is she to tell you what you can or can not buy? If you owe her some money that is a different story but if you dont this is controlling.

 

[ubercat]

Given that she works through issues by throwing fits. Move out as your top priority. Then if u ve got enough cash left buy the bike.

 

[SeymourCake]

Why are you letting her dictate what you want in life? If there's something you want, you go get it. Do not seek approval from others. Why are you even with someone who would bargain the relationship you two have over this? I think it's time to move on and look for someone else. Go on No Contact while you're at it.

 

[ERB]

Did you get the bike? Did you upgrade the woman?

 

[Reykhel]

Any woman that gives an ultimatum has control issues and can go fvck herself

An ultimatum is not a red flag, it's an immediate red card.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Why did you move in with a chick that you've only been with for 2.5 years? How did moving in with her benefit you? Rex says buy the motorcycle and move out. More than likely she'll fold and say it's cool for you to get the bike. If not, you'll have your own space without somebody telling you what you can and can't have, either way you win.

 

[stevo]

She won't let me buy a motorcycle,

This statement is the beginning and end of your trouble with your lady. You lost frame a long time ago to warrant a statement like this.

The issue is bigger than just a motorcycle. I can bet you she doesn't care if you bought the bike or not, this is more so her finding an avenue to show you who's now boss.

I will not move in with a lady but if I miraculously did, the minute she gives me the ultimatum to do blah the blah or move out, I'll move out.