she went from hot to cold what should i do?

[BobFuest]

So following the don juan methods i met up with a great chick. We have been dating (about 2-3 time a week) for about a month and things were great. she called me all the time to come over and sleep with her and have sex and I met a lot of her friends. She even took me out on my birthday.

Let me tell you about her. this girl and I are just dating and all her friends are guys so it would be stupid to think she may not have a guy somewhere else. Guys like her but shes not a total attention ***** or "needy" for guys attention. She doesnt seem like a total *****.

Now (lately), she acts weird towards me. Not so weird as, "not as hot as before". things cooled off a little. We havent had sex in about a week and every night i was there this last week she has not asked me to sleep over. But she calls me every other day to come hangout. Which i do go most of the time. but it ends up with me going home when she goes to bed. So i tell her straight forward if I am wasting my time or if she really likes me. she says, "oh no, i like you like you like you." So ok, it was her rag or whatever so i give it to that. Then she still calls me to hangout (same week) but like i said, no sex or sleeping over. So i ask her today, "are you mad or something? because your acting a little weird lately." she says,"no everything is fine, i like you." which i said, "of course you like me. you wouldnt call me if you didnt."
Then she had to go to michigan and I gave her a ride to her friend's because i was going that way. We arrive and some older guy comes out and she gives me a hug but no kiss... This guy tries to come over and befriend me too. see who i am. He is suppose to be her friend's uncle..

Now i have entertained the thoughts of another alpha male takin my spot but why would she keep calling and telling me she likes me? She has gone in the other room and talked on the phone too when i come over (she has roomates that i am friends with so it seems very "hangout"). But we even joked about us having sex again soon before i dropped her off which confused me a whole lot more. I was (it seemed) the one she calls up for sex and cuddling but she hasnt wanted to really do that lately.

So, please help me with this. Am i getting played? maybe there is something she wants from me? Am i turning myself into an AFC just thinking about it? Should i just drop this now? Sorry so long but this was the only place i could turn and i actually like her and feel like i am letting it slip away... Btw she is not the only girl i am dating and I do get laid by other women (in case that makes a difference). Is being nice and doing things for her at this stage bad? not everything but i am helpful and a good guy about things.

 

[frivolousz21]

she is using you for attention until she finds her someone else.

u just got with a bad women.

i dated someone earlier this yr like this

 

[sexualchocolate]

thank goodness u have some poontang on the side.

the way u word it, sounds as if there is another interest. u havent been dating long, maybe another suitor has her interest as well.

always remember women are just as wh"reish as men.

all it takes is the right dude at the right time. and ur girl will be in the hucklebuck.

something is definitely going on with her. why else would she turn cold all of a sudden.

turn it around on her. play her game to see how she responds. leave the room to talk on ur phone. dont always answer her calls. make her think uve gone cold.

ur getting it elsewhere anyway.

because women want the man that every other woman wants.

 

[BobFuest]

before all this

before this last week she had been "oh i like you so much" and "oh i adore you bob". real strong.

 

[SeldomSeen]

RE:

Seldomseens advice: Put her in the friendzone before she puts you in it. Tell her you need to talk (makes women anxious, trust me Ive done it before) and then give her the friend spill. Be cool about it and such. Turning the tables on someone is a good way to stir their passion towards you.

Years ago I was about to get dumped ( too many indicators prior to it) but the girl still wanted to hang out, be friends and such so before she gave me the talk I went to the coffee shop were her best friend hung out at and told her that how I dont want to let her down but I think we should be friends, and how she should date someone who is good for her and would treat her like a queen (LOL, manipulative I know...) Anyway after her friend relayed that to her she tried calling me at 1am (she never had called me that late) and I didnt answer and at 1:30 I saw a car pull up to my apartment and it was her and she came to my door and was kind of shaking (nervous) and told me how much she missed me and loves me and Im like "hey are you alright, whats going on...?"

Anyway you get my point

 

[BobFuest]

Re: RE:

Originally posted by SeldomSeen
Seldomseens advice: Put her in the friendzone before she puts you in it. Tell her you need to talk (makes women anxious, trust me Ive done it before) and then give her the friend spill. Be cool about it and such. Turning the tables on someone is a good way to stir their passion towards you.

Years ago I was about to get dumped ( too many indicators prior to it) but the girl still wanted to hang out, be friends and such so before she gave me the talk I went to the coffee shop were her best friend hung out at and told her that how I dont want to let her down but I think we should be friends, and how she should date someone who is good for her and would treat her like a queen (LOL, manipulative I know...) Anyway after her friend relayed that to her she tried calling me at 1am (she never had called me that late) and I didnt answer and at 1:30 I saw a car pull up to my apartment and it was her and she came to my door and was kind of shaking (nervous) and told me how much she missed me and loves me and Im like "hey are you alright, whats going on...?"

Anyway you get my point

that makes me nervous that she will say, "aww i am sorry to hear that. really? ok." is there a way to sell it without ending up shooting myself in the foot?

 

[DonJuanMonk]

She's just not into you, move along

 

[SamePendo]

No offense dude, you're sounding like a chick:

Does he love me? Did he like my dress? Will he go out with me again?

Chicks wonder about that ****. Not men. Go to a pub and drink. But don't ever come with that *********.

(Next her)

 

[BobFuest]

Originally posted by SamePendo
No offense dude, you're sounding like a chick:

Does he love me? Did he like my dress? Will he go out with me again?

Chicks wonder about that ****. Not men. Go to a pub and drink. But don't ever come with that *********.

(Next her)

hey i cant help that i liked her! but your right. thank you guys for your advice.
I suppose the only follow up i have for this story is to ignore her and replace her number with a few more! Maybe something exotic heheheheheh
See you soon fellow DJs.

 

[anonymousguy]

bobfuest,

I have recently experienced the same situation. Girl approached me, acted to be very "friendly". You should remember that perception is not everything. She liked you, but after that she perhaps realised that it was not meant to be for you on the long term.
Women think differently and biologicly speaking, they have only one egg and they always must be sure that they have the best man for it.
Unfortunately for you, you obviously were not the right man for her.

Do not forget that it takes several short term relationships to figure out what kind of long term relationship you need. Some people are lucky, others need more shots.

Stay a man, Be a man, and do not let yourself being played by others.

 

[CHOCOLATE(COLA)]

Originally posted by anonymousguy
bobfuest,

I have recently experienced the same situation. Girl approached me, acted to be very "friendly". You should remember that perception is not everything. She liked you, but after that she perhaps realised that it was not meant to be for you on the long term.
Women think differently and biologicly speaking, they have only one egg and they always must be sure that they have the best man for it.
Unfortunately for you, you obviously were not the right man for her.

Do not forget that it takes several short term relationships to figure out what kind of long term relationship you need. Some people are lucky, others need more shots.

Stay a man, Be a man, and do not let yourself being played by others.

are u sure you are speaking biologically when u say only one egg?

 

[squirrels]

Yeah dude, you're getting played.

You became ROUTINE. You come over twice a week. The sex stopped because she got bored with you. You were there every time she called you to come up...and now you're worried because she hasn't called you as much.

Honestly...she OWNS you. Just by dialing your phone number she can alter your entire emotional state. She can have you any time she wants and you don't do anything original any more. You don't do stuff for YOURSELF.

There's nothing left for her to know about you. Now that she's got you locked down and figured out, she can put you away in the closet while she sees if someone else can offer her more.

As soon as she started cutting you off from the sex, you should've backed off. Not saying that would've "saved" it...she may have just thought you were using her and dumped you entirely.

LONG before it ever got to this point, you should've gotten yourself a life outside of her. Be unavailable once in a while. Don't answer every call. Don't be there every time she invites you. Don't sit and chill with her if she's not giving you the physical stuff you want from her. And on top of it all, DO NOT SIT THERE IN HER ROOM UNTIL SHE GETS BORED AND WANTS TO GO TO SLEEP!! Don't you have ANYTHING better you could be doing than sitting there adoring her??

 

[anonymousguy]

Originally posted by CHOCOLATE(COLA)
are u sure you are speaking biologically when u say only one egg?

LOL
Yes, I know women start with 40 000 eggs, but I meant the egg that could be fertilized AND yes I am aware that there could be twins, or triplets or whatever

Don't make it too difficult dude

 

[BobFuest]

Originally posted by squirrels
Yeah dude, you're getting played.

You became ROUTINE. You come over twice a week. The sex stopped because she got bored with you. You were there every time she called you to come up...and now you're worried because she hasn't called you as much.

Honestly...she OWNS you. Just by dialing your phone number she can alter your entire emotional state. She can have you any time she wants and you don't do anything original any more. You don't do stuff for YOURSELF.

There's nothing left for her to know about you. Now that she's got you locked down and figured out, she can put you away in the closet while she sees if someone else can offer her more.

As soon as she started cutting you off from the sex, you should've backed off. Not saying that would've "saved" it...she may have just thought you were using her and dumped you entirely.

LONG before it ever got to this point, you should've gotten yourself a life outside of her. Be unavailable once in a while. Don't answer every call. Don't be there every time she invites you. Don't sit and chill with her if she's not giving you the physical stuff you want from her. And on top of it all, DO NOT SIT THERE IN HER ROOM UNTIL SHE GETS BORED AND WANTS TO GO TO SLEEP!! Don't you have ANYTHING better you could be doing than sitting there adoring her??

well its not that dramatic. i do have a life outside of her and am out and gone every weekend and every other day doing gigs and having fun. she justs knows when i am free so thats when she calls me. I did back off and ignore her once and she called twice before she just said, "hey come over so we can make out." If it had been as dramatic and obvious i would have noticed sooner....

 

[BobFuest]

Originally posted by squirrels
Yeah dude, you're getting played.

You became ROUTINE. You come over twice a week. The sex stopped because she got bored with you. You were there every time she called you to come up...and now you're worried because she hasn't called you as much.

Honestly...she OWNS you. Just by dialing your phone number she can alter your entire emotional state. She can have you any time she wants and you don't do anything original any more. You don't do stuff for YOURSELF.

There's nothing left for her to know about you. Now that she's got you locked down and figured out, she can put you away in the closet while she sees if someone else can offer her more.

As soon as she started cutting you off from the sex, you should've backed off. Not saying that would've "saved" it...she may have just thought you were using her and dumped you entirely.

LONG before it ever got to this point, you should've gotten yourself a life outside of her. Be unavailable once in a while. Don't answer every call. Don't be there every time she invites you. Don't sit and chill with her if she's not giving you the physical stuff you want from her. And on top of it all, DO NOT SIT THERE IN HER ROOM UNTIL SHE GETS BORED AND WANTS TO GO TO SLEEP!! Don't you have ANYTHING better you could be doing than sitting there adoring her??

Dude you saved me! you were right and following your advice and my instincts I am now back in the saddle and am the alpha male. She is so off her game that I think she'll be saying she wants to be my gf real soon so she can have me all to her self! word pimp, i owe you one.

 

[doommarine44]

its time to ignore her calls or cut it short.. act like you have other plans and your busy to busy for her. She has you around her finger.. she calls you jump.. not good, try this first if she really seems not to care put her in friend zone

 

[Pookie]

Maybe she has her period so she is moody and doesn't want to sleep with you.

 

[BobFuest]

Originally posted by BobFuest
Dude you saved me! you were right and following your advice and my instincts I am now back in the saddle and am the alpha male. She is so off her game that I think she'll be saying she wants to be my gf real soon so she can have me all to her self! word pimp, i owe you one.

hey guys you can stop ragging on this now. read the message above. Squirrels gave me great advice and now I am back on top of my game.