"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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She Wants to be Friends Again!!

Industry

Senior Don Juan
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Ok I'll keep this short.

I met a girl and we were FB's for a few years when all the sudden she stopped messing around with me. I called her out and she said she "just wanted to be friends". (seeing someone else) Well, I told her that I have plenty of friends, all guys, and that I couldn't be "just friends" with her. So, I stopped talking to her.

Now, 6 months later, she sends me a text saying "Will we ever be friends again?" I'm not sure how to reply to this and I'm curious what people have to say. If she wants to be FB's again I'm all for it. But, if it's just "friends" she wants then no effing way. How should I go about figuring out exactly what she wants?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Rook

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Industry said:
How should I go about figuring out exactly what she wants?

ASK HER! DeedeeDee

You only mention that you like this girl for sex. Fair, but be up front about that when you ask her what she wants from you.

Honestly.... Grow a pair. You just want to go back to FBs... be a man and tell her that. She will not run away in horror, and (on the off chance she does), oh well. What did you lose?

Edit:

Just reread what you typed here....

You are more into this girl than you let on. If you want more from her...TELL HER!
 

SunnyD

Senior Don Juan
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Industry said:
Ok I'll keep this short.

I met a girl and we were FB's for a few years when all the sudden she stopped messing around with me. I called her out and she said she "just wanted to be friends". (seeing someone else) Well, I told her that I have plenty of friends, all guys, and that I couldn't be "just friends" with her. So, I stopped talking to her.

Now, 6 months later, she sends me a text saying "Will we ever be friends again?" I'm not sure how to reply to this and I'm curious what people have to say. If she wants to be FB's again I'm all for it. But, if it's just "friends" she wants then no effing way. How should I go about figuring out exactly what she wants?
Well, the first thing to find out is if she is single. If not, then no...don't bother.

If she is, I'd go on the assumption that she wants to get into bed with you again.

6 months eh? Good for her. I'm on one month and its taking everything I've got not to contact him.
 

Bible_Belt

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Well, the first thing to find out is if she is single. If not, then no...don't bother.

I disagree.

I'd go on the assumption that she wants to get into bed with you again.

I agree.
 

ZenGodMod

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Bible_Belt said:
Well, the first thing to find out is if she is single. If not, then no...don't bother.

I disagree.

I'd go on the assumption that she wants to get into bed with you again.

I agree.
Well, the first thing to find out is if she is single. If not, then no...don't bother.

I agreed on the disagree, but I'd check if she just got out of a relationship first and needs some rebound sex. if she does, your a tool. Nothing wrong with that, if thats your cup of Tea. TOOL!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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