"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
She wanted me to pay for everything.
- Thread starter ARrocket
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2005
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She can't figure you out because you are not like all the other bozos that spend their entire check or weekly allowance on her.
Continue to do what you are doing.
You are the man not her ATM machine you lead she follows and if she doesn't follow then its on to the NEXT one.
BTW, I love what Tom Leykis suggested on his show once about dating chicks.
Basically he said when you are working out a meeting time for a date casually ask the girl what time she is eating that night.
If she tells you say...
Great! I'll pick you up for drinks at (like an hour or two after the time she just gave you for when she's going to eat).
That way you avoid paying for dinner. :crackup:
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
I asked her to go to a museum with me. haha it might sound kinda lame but as we're underage there is not much to do here in the winter, I'm tired of bowling and movies and ice skating.
I've just started seeing this one girl. we've been out twice.
First night was dinner and then coffee at a coffee shop and then we just hung out and talked till about 1AM and we parted ways.
Second time, I asked to go to a basketball game with me. We did, I bought the tickets, and after the game it was late so we actually grabbed a pizza at the grocery store and cooked it at my apt. I paid for that too.
We hung out at my place, watched a movie, and and talked till like 4AM, made out some. I asked her to stay, and she gave a couple excuses, so I was like, ok, I'll take ya home. I get to her house, and she asks me if I wanna come inside for some caffeine. I declined. Didn't want THAT at that time, if ya know what I mean.
I don't mind really, and I always like to pay on the first date and the second.
However, I'm at the point where I'd like for her to join in and offer to pay, but have Is et a bad precedent? If so, how do I change it without seeing rude?
She generally seems VERY nice and polite and I don't see her as gold digging.
We're going out this friday, dinner will be on the menu.
Suggestions?
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
But next time, you can say "hey, you're taking me out to (wherever) this Saturday right?"
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
The last girl I was seeing, I saw her probably 8 times over the time we went out, (rant)(till she said, I don't have romantic feelings for you), see other thread about that retardedness cause I don't make out multiple times with people I don't have feelings for. LOL ANYWAY (/rant)
Anyway, that last girl, right before she stopped seeing me, she said something about how she felt like she should pay some times, and she wasn't used to having anyone pay for her cause she was always the girl in her group even that had money to do things. Everyone else was always broke.
So, I'm fine with paying friday, I was just asking for ideas on how to work out of it.
So, ya think, for the time after, if i just basically say, "So is tonight/whenever on you?" and make it in a joking sort of tone?
girls tend to do that, if she invites you in, UR IN!anyways, u gotta be smooth about the fact that you want her to pay... take the suggestion about saying ur short and dont wanna drop by the bank... (i've used that one a couple times, and it has never caused any issues)
as to the ARocket: u played the hand you were dealt as well as u could have.. but you have to respect her brutal honesty as well.. i'd much rather a ***** tell me she doesnt expect to pay for her **** right at the start, then finding out when the bill comes..