"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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She thinks I don't pay attention

young pat

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I have been gaming this chic for a little while now and there is one thing that is very odd about her. When ever we have a conversation, in which ever form it may be in, and she tells me something unique, ie "I went to the city yesterday and...." (she lives in a small town, I'm in the bush, literally) I'll bring it up the next time I talk to her, ex "so how did you adventure in the big city go?" and she will seem a little thrown back at the fact that I had remembered she had told me that. She will make a big deal about the fact that I pay attention to unique things in conversation, with some patronizing statement like "I didn't think you'd remember" or "I'm surprised you remembered that"

I have never had a woman act so surprised or taken back by the fact that someone listens to some of what they say. I don't think that this is her attempt at trying to be playful or c&f, is this as big of a sign of low interest as I think, or am I over reacting here.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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WC2

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I think you're over thinking a bit.

Remember that a lot of things that women do say really mean nothing. I wouldn't see this example as anything different. Women love to talk.
 

02hero

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I'm sorry what's this thread about, I wasn't paying attention.......seriously I don't think it's a big deal as long as you don't creep her out by behaving like someone who is obsessed with what's going on in her life and not your own.
Does she remember important things about you, and take an equal or more amount of interest in your life? If the answer is no to these questions you may be right and I suggest maybe pulling back a bit. If the answer is yes, nothing to worry about.
 

JahGlory

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Why would you ask her the next time about something she told you happened in the past the 1st time?

Odd.. But anyway, women dont want you to listen to their words, they want you to listen to the underlying feelings that tell you whats really up. "I went to the cottage yetserday" could really mean "my boyfriend is a ****ing jerk and I dont really care about you but I want to lay the first thing that talks to me" you need to pay attention.
 

young pat

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Oops, sorry about that, that was a case of posting when I should have been sleeping. It should have read something like "I'm going to the city today and am going to..." not "I went to the city yesterday and...."

To answer your question 02, yes she does seem to take equal interest in my life. I'm by no means obsessive, I'm not bringing up something that happened a week prior, I'm talking two days tops and only if its out of the ordinary.

For example it was her birthday a couple weeks ago, and she kept telling me that it was her birthday on x. Every other day she'd mention something about her birthday. Then when the day came and I wished her a happy birthday, she got all surprised that I had remembered. I got the lines like
"you remembered, I didn't expect you to remember" and "you don't strike me as someone to remember a birthday." Throughout our short (10 min tops) Im coversation she would keep bringing up the fact, maybe four or five times, that I remembered with phrases like that.

I don't want to seem as if I'm obsessing over this, but this strikes me as a little odd that she would say this all the time. Maybe I am just over thinking.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Bible_Belt

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Yes, you are over-thinking. She obviously likes you, good enough.

But fwiw I am good at remembering what a girl has said in passing. I give great gifts because of it. "Thoughtful" is the good way of being cheap. Make a mental note when she says that she likes something, and just remember for the next time it comes up. Little things like this give a girl justification for liking you and stories to tell to her friends and family about how thoughtful and perfect you are. If a girl likes you, then you will be Mr Perfect for remembering something simple like what type of bottled water she likes best. If a girl does not like you, then even if you showered her with flowers and expensive gifts, you would come off not as being romantic, but as a creepy stalker. It's all in her head.

As I said, she likes you. Go for it.
 
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