She sends message then deletes it

[mikedee]

Hey guys,

I've been dating that girl from Belarus, we were supposed to see each other this weekend. I invited her out, I could feel that she was distant and flakey, she finally told me that she couldn't make it and didn't propose anything, I didn't reply assuming she was soft nexting me and I quickly moved on. She texted me one hour ago: "Hi are you at school?"

I saw the notification, but didn't answer as I was busy and I was not at school. A bit later, I came to reply and she had deleted the message for both of us (Telegram). I replied even if the message has disappeared: "No I'm not, I'm home already."

Maybe she texted the wrong guy but I doubt it because I'm probably the only "Mikedee" in her phone, other guys are Slavic (Russians, Czechs, etc..). First time it happens to me, what does it mean? What would you do?

Thanks!

 

[Bigpapa]

Hey guys,

I've been dating that girl from Belarus, we were supposed to see each other this weekend. I invited her out, I could feel that she was distant and flakey, she finally told me that she couldn't make it and didn't propose anything, I didn't reply assuming she was soft nexting me and I quickly moved on. She texted me one hour ago: "Hi are you at school?"

I saw the notification, but didn't answer as I was busy and I was not at school. A bit later, I came to reply and she had deleted the message for both of us (Telegram). I replied even if the message has disappeared: "No I'm not, I'm home already."

Maybe she texted the wrong guy but I doubt it because I'm probably the only "Mikedee" in her phone, other guys are Slavic (Russians, Czechs, etc..). First time it happens to me, what does it mean? What would you do?

Thanks!

you looked low value , because now she knows that you were not busy and just deliberately ignored her ( and she will backwords rationalize that you are butth8rt about flaking on your - basically being reactive )

you could have easily replied with “ ?” And put the ball in her court

 

[mikedee]

you looked low value , because now she knows that you were not busy and just deliberately ignored her ( and she will backwords rationalize that you are butth8rt about flaking on your - basically being reactive )

you could have easily replied with “ ?” And put the ball in her court

I deliberately postponed the reply because I was busy and it was not urgent. Because I'm at home I'm not busy? I could have received the message when I was in the train and replied when I arrived home. Plus I was not at school. And I told her the truth, I don't lie or play little games.
Don't tell me you never ignore texts or delay a reply. Please.

I didn't ask if you think I'm beta or low value or whatever, the question is what would you do and what do you think happened.
Your reply doesn't really makes sense, it looks you felt like bashing someone and I was at the right place and at the right time.

 

[The Duke]

This is your standard case of low interest. They either comply with your proposals or you find another. A woman with high interest will move mountains to make a date happen and won't flake.

When a guy approaches dating like women do he gains the upper hand. Get a few more qued up so it won't matter what this one does. You'll be less tolerant, make better choices, and as a result enjoy dating more. And the women will try harder because they see you have value.

 

[Dr.Suave]

She has low interest. Go no contact. If she reaches out she has to comply or bye.

 

[mikedee]

This is your standard case of low interest. They either comply with your proposals or you find another. A woman with high interest will move mountains to make a date happen and won't flake.

When a guy approaches dating like women do he gains the upper hand. Get a few more qued up so it won't matter what this one does. You'll be less tolerant, make better choices, and as a result enjoy dating more. And the women will try harder because they see you have value.

I understand that, I think she lost interest during the weekend for whatever reason, there is nothing I can do about it. But why she sent a message and then deleted it? Not gonna pursue, she knows where to find me, I just don't understand. Women are pros with this kind of little games, she should know that there are good chances that I saw the message, and it would make her look weird, like why did you delete the message?

I never delete messages. But it's me.
Thanks for your reply Howiestern

 

[mikedee]

She has low interest. Go no contact. If she reaches out she has to comply or bye.

That's it. I think she is a bit weird too, and flakey. Her ex is in the picture I'm pretty sure.
Thanks man

 

[Bigpapa]

I deliberately postponed the reply because I was busy and it was not urgent. Because I'm at home I'm not busy? I could have received the message when I was in the train and replied when I arrived home. Plus I was not at school. And I told her the truth, I don't lie or play little games.
Don't tell me you never ignore texts or delay a reply. Please.

I didn't ask if you think I'm beta or low value or whatever, the question is what would you do and what do you think happened.
Your reply doesn't really makes sense, it looks you felt like bashing someone and I was at the right place and at the right time.

problem is that you did this after she turned cold Towards you , which made you look reactive ( this is how she will rationalize it )

she did not had low interest , because she double texted you ( just that she wanted to do it in a way that will keep her value intact - not through supplication )

You can accept this , or you can auto reject like these guys tell you ( “ bro is low interest from her side . You were mega alpha . It is not you , it is her )

and continuing this , her sh1t test was Very likely instigated because of another low value behavior you had ( or subcommunicated )

I do not care what you think and you are free to think whatever makes you feel better , but the truth is the truth ( and most of the cases is not what we want to hear )

 

[mikedee]

problem is that you did this after she turned cold Towards you , which made you look reactive ( this is how she will rationalize it )

Did what?

 

[MtmVaott]

Yes, it's some stupid game of her. I don't know why they are doing it, because if you "win", the only thing you will be interested in is fvcking and dumping her.
She told you "nah, not interested".
So if she asks you "hey, I am right now wasting your time " you are more or less advised to block or ignore her.

 

[The Duke]

I understand that, I think she lost interest during the weekend for whatever reason, there is nothing I can do about it. But why she sent a message and then deleted it? Not gonna pursue, she knows where to find me, I just don't understand. Women are pros with this kind of little games, she should know that there are good chances that I saw the message, and it would make her look weird, like why did you delete the message?

I never delete messages. But it's me.
Thanks for your reply Howiestern

Women are emotional, which makes it hard to pinpoint why they do what they do. Using rational logical to try and understand an emotional creature doesn't always lead us to the answers.

She most likely does have some interest, which is why she sent the message. However maybe she just needed her daily dose of validation hoping you would provide it by responding. You could probably play some push/pull games and increase her interest enough to get some sechs but it will still be frustrating. Best to find new girls to expend energy on.

Always remember the currency that is being traded. Women want to be paid in validation. That's what they buy their dopamine hit with. A guy gets paid with secks. That's what provides the dopamine hit for us. Make sure you are getting an appropriate return on your investment.

 

[Velasco]

the question is what would you do

I would have not responded after she deleted her message.

You say you don't play games but this the second time you doing some butthurt sh1t.

The other thread you made, you said you quote responded to a girl saying she was busy this weekend, with "no worries " (like "ha I got you b1tch!") after she rejected your invite for hanging out with her friends.

Now you trying to play some game here by responding after she deleted her message, leaving her like "ok so he DID see my message. Why wait to respond after I deleted it?"

So even if you think you too good for games, still got to play them or they will play you

 

[Bigpapa]

Did what?

replying to a message that she deleted after sending it , showing that you read it but chose to ignore her ( but remembered exactly what she said )

you were a little too "ok" with her flaking on you, so she made an attempt to get a little more ego validation back by the follow-up message. When you ignored that too, she got insecure and felt rejected so she nuked the conversation. Its all tied to the ego.

You miss the context . Till now he was bragging ( which is fair enough ) , and then now out of sudden she starts being flaky

it never happens over night and not without the guy loosing frame

what she did is a relationship sh1t test and he over reacted

@mikedee don’t tell me that you did not replied to her on purpose ( to teach her a lesson )

women are not stupid , and most women will outsmart a guy playing games

 

[mikedee]

I would have not responded after she deleted her message.

You say you don't play games but this the second time you doing some butthurt sh1t.

The other thread you made, you said you quote responded to a girl saying she was busy this weekend, with "no worries " after she rejected your invite for hanging out with her friends.

Now you trying to play some game here by responding after she deleted her message, leaving her like "ok so he DID see my message. Why wait to respond after I deleted it?"

So even if you think you too good for games, still got to play them or they will play you

Not butthurt, I saw the message and replied that's it. Is it playing game? No it's replying the message, if she deleted it it's her problem, not mine.
Again not butthurt, disappointed sometimes yes, but not butthurt.

 

[Velasco]

Not butthurt, I saw the message and replied that's it. Is it playing game?

You did not my friend. Let me quote your own post

I deliberately postponed the reply

Then after she deleted it can you tell me why you responded then?
I know why.
And so do you

she should know that there are good chances that I saw the message, and it would make her look weird, like why did you delete the message?

She deleted it because she knew by you not responded meant that you were pissed about her flaking on you. So she's like "k nevermind". Then you were like, nah I saw it. And here is me responding to it. Bet you feel dumb now deleting that message huh?" Like your getting back at her.

 

[mikedee]

replying to a message that she deleted after sending it , showing that you read it but chose to ignore her ( but remembered exactly what she said )




You miss the context . Till now he was bragging ( which is fair enough ) , and then now out of sudden she starts being flaky

it never happens over night and not without the guy loosing frame

what she did is a relationship sh1t test and he over reacted

@mikedee don’t tell me that you did not replied to her on purpose ( to teach her a lesson )

women are not stupid , and most women will outsmart a guy playing games

The message was displayed in the notification on the lock screen (I didn't "open" the message), I saw it and of course I read it, it's a short message but yes I was busy doing homework. Do you always reply right away when a girl text you? I don't think so. I didn't over react, I didn't react at all.
Bragging? I don't think so. But if there is something I can brag about is the fact that I'm probably one of the few on this forum that approach women and date women, make mistake and try to learn. Remember my daygame challenge?

You said she was NOT low interest and then you said she become cold/low interest because I lost frame or whatever, you're confused and you are not trying to help, you just want to prove that you're smart and know everything. If I didn't want feedback I wouldn't post here.

I don't agree with you but anyway thanks for your help I appreciate it. I feel a bit of envy but maybe that's just me.

 

[mikedee]

You did not my friend. Let me quote your own post

Then after she deleted it can you tell me why you responded then?
I know why.
And so do you

She deleted it because she knew by you not responded meant that you were pissed about her flaking on you. So she's like "k nevermind". Then you were like, nah I saw it. And here is me responding to it. Bet you feel dumb now deleting that message huh?" Like your getting back at her.

So when you don't reply a message right away it means you're pissed off? you must be pissed off all the time.
I won't argue with you,I understand your point but it doesn't apply here. Thanks for your help Velasco.

 

[Velasco]

But if there is something I can brag about is the fact that I'm probably one of the few on this forum that approach women and date women

And I applaud you for that. Which makes no sense why you listen to these guys go on about this "if she's high interest she won't play games with you" type responses. When you should know that's not how it is. Especially if the girl is hot

What you learn is the guys who say these things are either
1) dating mid girls
2) dating older women
3) not sleeping with any girls at the moment
4) do not cold approach

 

[Bigpapa]

So when you don't reply a message right away it means you're pissed off? you must be pissed off all the time.
I won't argue with you,I understand your point but it doesn't apply here. Thanks for your help Velasco.

good luck bro , but stop making stupid threads

 

[mikedee]

And I applaud you for that. Which makes no sense why you listen to these guys go on about this "if she's high interest she won't play games with you" type responses. When you should know that's not how it is. Especially if the girl is hot

What you learn is the guys who say these things are either
1) dating mid girls
2) dating older women
3) not sleeping with any girls at the moment
4) do not cold approach

Then I shouldn't listen to guy like you
Seriously thanks man, we don't agree but it doesn't mean we have to bash each other. I appreciate that you took the time to reply.