She says I don't give enough affection

[frank05]

I've been in a relationship with this girl for 3 months. Although she is more of the shy/insecure type I find her personality interesting (and her body,too). I have goog conversations with her,building high rapport,mixing humour in, and giving light c&f from time to time. I don't call her too much and I don't see her more than twice a week. In other words, I think I'm doing the right things. The problem is that she told me she felt that I didn't give her enough affection. I told her that if she wants a wussy who she can walk all over, she is with the wrong guy.
She replied that she didn't want a ***** that compliments/calls/says I love you all the time , but that I could show more affection- The truth is I don't talk much about my feelings and I compliment her very rarely. Should I change this a bit because she is the shy type or am I doing all right?

 

[BGMan]

Three months? Yes, definitely go ahead and start showing her SOME affection. My dad shows my mom affection occasionally and they're still together, lol. Just don't become a wussy.

BGMan

 

[Kaine]

Need more details.

Here are some general observations.

Healthy girls need this. Affection is important for LTR.
Show affection at least physically.
Be sweet in a playful and teasing way.
Be unpredictable with this.

 

[Dukester]

w/ a shy type of girl, and after 3 months def. show her some more affection.
dont bend over backwards 4 her, buy her flowers, or call her all the time.
but w/ a shy girl, you need to do random acts of kindness pretty often, cuz it builds up thier self esteem,a nd pulls them outta thier shy shell

 

[frank05]

The fact is that we were "best friends" in college for two years.
She knows me really well and knows that i'm not an AFC.
She is really shy and insecure, specially when she is with people she doesn't know, and I don't really know why, because in bed she is as horny as a teenage monkey, like everyone else.
So I guess a compliment here and there will do the trick.
Would you also tell her that I have feelings for her,or something like that?

 

[Kaine]

No you don't have to verbalise it, if you do, do it indirectly, playfully or/and or teasingly
Do show it in your actions (Chivalry, cuddling after s3x etc)
Don't force your compliments like you have a tally to keep
Reward her with her good behaviour

 

[JohnJones]

You can probably also show her affection with a look at the right time. She knows you're not an AFC, she knows you're a real man, and she needs to know that she's got some amount of special access to you above what other people have.

I would let her comment wear off (so that it doesn't seem like you just snapped to when she said something) and then occasionally give her a look, compliment or comment. They don't have to be sappy or over emotional either

 

[DeathDealer]

don't worry about gushing your feelings or giving the girl compliments. actions speak louder than words. holding her hand or giving her a kisses speaks loudly enough how you feel about her.

 

[huge_guy_pimpin]

Originally posted by JohnJones
You can probably also show her affection with a look at the right time. She knows you're not an AFC, she knows you're a real man, and she needs to know that she's got some amount of special access to you above what other people have.

I would let her comment wear off (so that it doesn't seem like you just snapped to when she said something) and then occasionally give her a look, compliment or comment. They don't have to be sappy or over emotional either

yes, start later, and do it gradually.

 

[thefonz]

i dunno man...shy girls like yuo describe are dangerous, if anyone read my post (which i doubt anyone did cus they took it down the next day) I talked about how my friend was loosing his soul to a girl who hated socializing and her life revolved around him. Now he's completely miserable, never hangs with his friends (rarely with girl constantly checking up) and worst of all HE HAS TURNED INTO HER.......beware my fellow dj, beware.....these girls have a tendency to destroy your dreams