She said she is seeing a guy but has agreed to go on a date with me.

[deuce42]

Hi friends. Love to hear your wisdom on how I should play this.

I worked with this chick for two and a half years. We became good friends and I thought I was in the friendzone. Both of us are leaving our jobs in a few weeks. I figured I had nothing to lose anyway and we had joked before about what we were buying each other for leaving presents.

I said “I have worked out what I want for my present – I want a date!”

She said blankly without moving an eyelid “I am seeing somebody”. I do think she has been seeing a guy for the last six weeks.

I responded “I don’t care, I want to go on a date!”

She stopped for a moment and then said “ok”.

Then we just continued on with a conversation about music etc.

So now I am a bit stuck with where I go with this one. I know she is seeing another guy, but she has agreed to my date and she must have known all along how I felt about her.

Do I step up to the plate with this one and be extra flirtatious etc or should I not bother too hard. Is she just going on the date to be nice?

Is this worth pushing hard for?

 

[Scion]

I doubt much will come out of it if she mentioned a girl she just starting seeing. But go, have fun, and try to get her to pay for you, lol

 

[vatoloco]

She said blankly without moving an eyelid “I am seeing somebody”. I do think she has been seeing a guy for the last six weeks.

Exclusively?

 

[deuce42]

Exclusively?

Ah yes I see your point. She may just be keeping her options open. The other guy may not be the only guy she intends to see.

 

[Diaforetikos]

I agree with Scion. Don't see much coming out of this. Just go it though, and have fun.

 

[f283000]

Women do this for 3 reasons from what I have learned.

So you can go away: Telling you they have a bf/are seeing somebody is their anti-nice guy repellant. Just like they tell you that they have a bf when they don't it's the nice gentle female way of telling you they are not interested go away!

To test your standards: If it's true that they are seeing someone or other people and you still push for her it shows you have low standards/don't have other options. You think a girl is going to keep pursing a guy that tells her he's seeing other girls? of course not. But guys will pursue girls like this because they are desperate and don't care about sloppy seconds or thirds .

To get you to pursue them to prove to them you are not a nice guy: Women like being pursued but they don't want to waste their time with nice guys which is why they don't make it easy on you. They want to see if you're a man first which is why they will give you the boyfriend/seeing other people excuse to test you to see if you are aggressive enough to keep pushing for them and prove you are not a nice guy.

It can be any of the 3 above you never really know. The main point is that if a girl is interested in you in any way she will not give you the boyfriend/seeing other people excuse. I rather not waste my time with such women it's an instant NEXT for me.