"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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She might be Lesbian

amoka

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Alright this girl and I have been hitting it off lately. For some reason, I act a complete AFC when in her presence. I tried not to touch her too much but for some reasons I can't resists it. Yesterday for instance, I invited her to my place where she cooked. After eating, we began dancing ( and it was a very closed dance) then she said, "we are dancing too close. I don't like dancing so close." WTF. I turned of the light and we began dancing again. She time however, she was the one doing the closed dance.

What was weird was that whenever I tried kissing her, she'd draw back and push me away. I know she very well wanted to kiss me. Then at last I pulled the kiss test on her. I asked her on a scale of 1-10 how good a kisser was she. She said 1. Then I told her no wonder. Two minutes later, we started kissing. I tried escalating, then she said. "not too fast. You're really fast." then I said. " I know. In every aspect of my life." We kissed some more but not fvck close. I know she wanted to fvck me so bad but I think I'm making seems like I need her too bad. A typical AFC behaviour.

Now let me tell you a little bit about this girl. She is a very intellectual girl. Getting her Ph.D in Psychology this May. Her last relationship lasted couple of month. Whenever she talks to me, she sounds like ready to settle down and get married or some. Somehow, I have the feelings she is using some of her psychology stuff on me. Or maybe she knows of the game.

Anyway, I called her today and asked her what her plans are on wednesday and she said she is inviting her girlfriend over for dinner. WTF.

I don't know if I have a question for you guys for my situation. Because I know what I'm doing wrong: trying to be needy of her. I guess my question is what you all do to avoid this sort of things from happening to you. Thus the desire to touch the laddies yet resist doing so.

I just want to know not to particularly game this girl but many others. I pulled "macho" style on a girl once and she got stack with me but I did not like her. This girl just messed up my game.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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azanon

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If it were me:

> I'm not sure there's such thing as touching too much, or dancing too close. Escalate in a proper order and don't apologize for doing man things (like getting close to her while dancing). Hell, dont apologize period for anything unless there is absolutely no question you actually did something wrong.

> Don't ask a girl how good a kisser she is when you can just find out right there. Just dont do it anyway; its just not a manly thing to do IMO.

>So what if she's almost got a Ph. D in Psychology. She's still afficted with womanism disease (not being a hater here), and a lot of the intellectual women are less experienced with men.

>Focus on teasing her to physically want you; not the other way around. If you guys go all the way, think "she won you" and what a lucky girl she is and not vise versa.

>The only surefire cure of neediness I know of is to constantly be reminded how many women there are out there. If you've started a nice plate spin where you have several options, then you're not going to care so much how one of the many is coming along.
 

amoka

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The funny thing was this girl was really willing to do the same thing with me. Whe I'm not touching her, she tries to touch me secretely, like teasing me or something. terrible.
 

woods

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Why the hell do you think she's a lesbian? All chicks have girlfriends. And guess what her and her girlfriend were talking about over dinner. you. And chances are, her girlfrend asked her straight out if she slept with you, and when she said no, I'll bet her girlfriend said "Why not?" Her girlfriend is saying one of two things:

1. Make him wait, so you know he really likes you, and not just trying to get in your pants.
or
2. Quit being such a damn prude and get laid already!

Have you ever notice that people only take the advice they want to hear? They just want someone to "validate" them. So if gf is #2, you will get some immediately, and if she's #1, you will get some soon.
 

amoka

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woods said:
Why the hell do you think she's a lesbian? All chicks have girlfriends. And guess what her and her girlfriend were talking about over dinner. you. And chances are, her girlfrend asked her straight out if she slept with you, and when she said no, I'll bet her girlfriend said "Why not?" Her girlfriend is saying one of two things:

1. Make him wait, so you know he really likes you, and not just trying to get in your pants.
or
2. Quit being such a damn prude and get laid already!

Have you ever notice that people only take the advice they want to hear? They just want someone to "validate" them. So if gf is #2, you will get some immediately, and if she's #1, you will get some soon.
Lol. This is very true. We met today at the gym and she asked me to take her out on saturday. Damn, we went out three times (1 dance, 2 her place, 3 my place) and was only able to get a kiss. This saturday should certainly be the day. :wave: :yes:
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Bonhomme

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I don't know if I have a question for you guys for my situation. Because I know what I'm doing wrong: trying to be needy of her.
This saturday should certainly be the day.
Relate the 2nd quote to the 1st. You're probably too close to the situation to see the forest for the trees, but it's obvious to me that the more you try to force the action, the more she pulls away. As much as one may want to bang a gal, if it's internalized as a goal, the vibe goes all wrong, and one tends to act in a way that's a big turn-off.

Just have fun with her, go with the flow of things, and they'll happen as a matter of course without the sort of crash-and-burn scenarios that arise when things are forced and happen prematurely.

Enjoy!
 

Mind_Body_Soul

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Just have fun with her, go with the flow of things, and they'll happen as a matter of course without the sort of crash-and-burn scenarios that arise when things are forced and happen prematurely.
This should be your mindset in everything. Don't force situations; just try to have fun. The sex will come but don't rush it, just enjoy the flow.
 

amoka

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Alright. I'll act cool and let things floow this time. Thanks all.
 
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