"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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She likes me, i like her... She has a boyfriend

rusty_boi

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There is a girl who i know through friends (mel), and i think she is really good looking. Last year i found out she thought the same, and at a party i asked her out but she had a boyfriend, we spoke for a bit afterwards i was told she wanted to stay friends. I didnt want that so i stopped talking to her. They broke up in this time of us not talking and she met a new guy.

She came to my party last week and i got ridiculously drunk and asked her out again (i dont remember doing it). My brother in laws put in a good word last week for me but she said she has a boyfriend. I was told by my brother in laws that she was interested though.

When i found out i asked her out, i spoke to her the next day because i didnt remember a thing, she was really good about it and we laughed it off. She messaged me later in the day saying "I saw on facebook we had a photo together, boyfriend."

Now while this was all going, ive been really badly hung up on a girl at my work who also is taken. So i went to another party last saturday (in an attempt to get over the work girl). I put hardly any effort into dressing up and i nearly didnt go.

So i went and hung out with my mates, and then mel turned up. Now at this stage i was thinking get me out of here, well thats the clean version anyway, it was still embaressing what i did (i also stripped to my underwear at my party). I had no idea she was going to come, but then i thought she is here now i may aswell face the music.

I went straight up to her and said hi and she said "Hey boyfriend." We laguhed and talked about what happend for a bit then chit chat and eventually she said "can we be pretend boyfriend and girlfriend for the night?" i agreed, so we introduced each other as partners to some people, i bought a few drinks for her, we danced, we flirted.

Now i wasnt drinking, but she was, and i was happy because i was funny and witty and she was loving it. Anyway later in the night she said to me "I like you. But i have a boyfriend." i said to her "Its ok" she then said "i could cheat on him, im joking, im joking." i told her im not going to anyway becuase ive had it done to me before. So we hung out for alot of the night.

During the night one of her friends came up to me and we chatted about mel. She asked if i thought mel was leading me on. i said no, im interested in her but i dont like her.

At the end of the night we were sitting out the front talking, and mel said to me " i really like you, i wish i met you earlier so we could go out." i shrugged my shoulders. and she said "thats not a good reaction!" i then said "No its not like that but the fact is you do have a boyfriend and we didnt meet earlier, so what can i do? If in the future your not together then we will go out." She was happy about that.

We were all talking as a group later and she said "We should all go out for lunch."

So we all hanging out the front for a few hours and she held hands with me for like 1 minute then stopped. She later hugged me from behind for a minute, then stopped. She was waiting for her boyfriend to pick her up in this time, so maybe thats why she was doing it.

So one of her friends was being a drunk idiot and did not want to go home with mel so i went to go and get the friend while mel got her boyfriend to meet me on the street with the friend. I got the friend in the car, shook the boyfriends hand, and off they drove.

I messaged her later saying "Thanks for saying bye!" she replied saying "hope you got home ok bf, im so sorry i was sorting everything out." Then sent another one saying "P.S Goodnight bf, have a good sleep."

Then on monday i got a text from her saying "Cops came into work today and i thought one of them was you." (im a cop and patrol where she lives and works) we sent a few texts back and forth just chatting and stopped.

Then last night (tuesday) she approached me on facebook chat, we were talking and being playful for a while. then i brought up how when were drunk we hit on each other and she said "Yeh you love me, you think im god" i said "Pfft, you love me more ill even quote you on saturday "I really like you" She replied "I was hoping you would forget, but i realised you werent drinking." So without looking too much into it, it doesnt look positive from her. But when we were saying goodbye she wrote "Have a good day at work my policeman :) and goodnight"

So the good news is, because of last saturday i have taken a huge step towards getting over the girl at my work.

Now its obvious this girl is interested in me, but i dont really know what to do. I want to be around, but not too much that i get friend zoned. Im not looking to break them up, because like i said i have had it done to me and i refuse to do that. But i dont want to loose the ground i have made. Any ideas?? or should i just ask her to coffee?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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SandHawk

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I stopped reading after the whole "I could cheat on him" part. Dude, you should made out with her, she was totally up for that. If she wants to pretend bf/gf for the night, just be confident enough to claim what is yours: A kiss from your pretend girlfriend.

Escalate this bullsh*t and make her cheat!
 

horaholic

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exactly. Then get rid of her because she'll do it to you too. It sounds like either she's an attention hor, or she wants you to make the moves so she can cheat, yet not blame herself cuz it 'just happened.' She's giving you the green light.
 

DonGorgon

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blah blah blah she is a ho.. so f her and move on to the next one don't waist time trying to save her or make her leave her man she is with him for a reason and u don't wana be him u fist wana f her ,, so do that and keep it simple
 

drak_ool

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I stopped reading after the "i asked her out twice while she branch swung from one dude to the other"

First, how old are you? asking girls out is fine for elementary school, but it becomes a lot less effective later in life. If you want a girl make a move (at least kiss her).

Second, girl went from one bf to the other while she knew you were interested. That s a deal breaker right there. Maybe if you had made the right move you could have got this girl. But you didn't and it seems that her attraction level to you is not too high. Just hight enough to tease you, i guess...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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rusty_boi

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drak ool, im 21 and not too experienced with girls, so when you say asking girls out only works in elementary school, thats fine. But how do adults end up dating?
 

Lexington

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You don't "ask a girl out" like they do in the movies. You just start chatting with her and start flirting with her. You'll be able to tell quite quickly from her actions if she's into you or not. So if you start kinoing her and she's receptive to it, she's interested. Then you just try to isolate her at the party itself or you try and invite her to do something later. Once you isolate, you escalate and go for the kiss close.

Stop wasting time with taken chicks. You're 21. There's lots of single 18-22 year olds looking for boyfriends or a fvck. You should always be gaming MULTIPLE chucks at once. Always have a whole bunch of options to choose from. That way, you'll never be desperate.

Even if you could possibly steal a taken chick away from her boyfriend, why bother? There are lots of hot single chicks to be had. Why deal with these unnecessary obstacles?
 

kingsam

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you WILL get cheated on wiht this girl....
1-either bang and boot her, not getting involved , then go to no 2.
2-find better women
 
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