"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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She is playing mind games way too much - dominating me

jagr84

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Mauser96 said:
So...you are still chasing. Even though she doesn't respond to your texts, etc. Still chasing.

I am not trying to be a **** buddy, just trying to make you see the light and save your self-esteem.

STOP wasting time on her.

Stop chasing.

DELETE her number.

If she contacts you again ,which she likely will, once she realizes you have lost interest, (she loves attention and orbiters), say this:

Her: Hey, what's up?

You : not alot. Who's this ? (That tells her she has been deleted. This will piss her off, so be it. Still bet she replies)

Her: It's Vanessa, silly.

You: Let me guess, you want to take me out?
Her: (any answer besides yes, more excuses, dodging, mind games)


You: Get ahold of me when you are free.


Her: .................blah,blah, blah

You: Silence


And you keep that silence. You don't respond anymore.

Rinse and repeat. She will find greener pastures to attention-mine, or she will say yes.


Personally?? I simply would delete her number and never even respond. Self-respect, and all.
Will save it, thank you

but does it really look like Im sweating/chasing her? The story is just very weird (from the beginning) thats why I am so intrigued, because honestly I dont really care about her, hence why I text her like once every 3-4 weeks. As I said its the story, I have so many other options. Even if it shows its not like I am miserable, its just so painful for my head lol
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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asa_don

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the title of this thread says it all, it isnt going to work, it doesn't look good in your favor.

seriously, if this girl had any interest at all a date would have happened by now, girls don't play all these sorts of games on guys they take an interest to, never should you have to work this hard for a date, if you do she will always have you by the balls.


Pimp-sicle said:
Bad advice Mauser.

All this communicates to the girl is that you let her get to you, got frustrated and most importantly don't know the way the game works.

The problem here is the OP hasn't proven that he is attractive and the MAN. She is running things and he is too afraid to be bold because he doesn't want to get rejected, hence why he posted this thread.

I don't agree with Nismo either or the majority of what this board tends to rehash. "Girls that are interested won't confuse you." -- that's a true statement, but girls have varying degrees of interest in you initially. What you do from the point attraction is established will either elevate it or drop it.

I'm all for going after girls who show strong interest, but then again most the girls who are super hot present more of a challenge than this cute to average girls.

OP you didn't do anything to increase attraction with this girl. If you want her, go get her. Waiting for her to text you? Not how its done.
i disagree

how long should he pursue her to prove he is attractive and the man?

trying to prove anything to her means you're a man of limitations, which is why you get rejected and ignored, you shouldn't have to prove anything to a girl.

alphas don't prove anything, they are already attractive to the woman.

betas need to prove because they don't have much self worth.
 

jagr84

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Mauser96 said:
In bold for you
Lol love your bold parts, Its okay I moved on but I disagree with the ‘she views me as orbiter’ part. Maybe now, but it wasnt always like that is certain.

EDIT: Also, I forgot to say, she asked me when are we gonna meet up for the date, but I didnt know when I could, so I told her I was gonna let her know. I moved on lol its okay
 

Kailex

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jagr84 said:
Lol love your bold parts, Its okay I moved on but I disagree with the ‘she views me as orbiter’ part. Maybe now, but it wasnt always like that is certain.
Orbiters gonna orbit.
They don't usually realize what they are until way later than she realized it.

It's okay, buddy, we've all gone through the denial phase at some point.
 

Navigator

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jagr84 said:
I see the point your trying to make but How am I qualifying myself to her ? Lol All I did was ask if she wanted to hang out in a spa with different ppl, actually its not even a spa, I dont know the name. Havent spoken to her in like 3 weeks
I am not even gonna respond to your last paragraph.
What does "hang out in a spa" mean, exactly ? To be blunt, at first blush it doesn't sound like optimal first date material. Unless you live in Finland, I suppose.

EDIT: Also, I forgot to say, she asked me when are we gonna meet up for the date, but I didnt know when I could, so I told her I was gonna let her know.
     


So you ask her out to this oddball spa date, she asks you specifically when, then you respond "I dunno".
This is just goofy. Plain ineffectual goofiness.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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jagr84

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Lol this girl still exists
So much happened since that last post,

its funny now she 'holds a grudge' against me because I ignored her completly for about 2-3 weeks. So after all, looked like she was very serious and not toying me around. She's very sensitive. Now its about getting back in touch with her
 
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