"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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she has a BOYFRIEND, but i want her!

bumblebee

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basically ive been into this girl recently. shes really friendly and it seems that as long as you take the initiative to talk to her she will be friendly and engage in good conversation with you (based on my observation when other guys first meet her). The thing is that her being really nice and giggly a lot makes it seem that shes into you, when maybe shes not...i dont know what IOIs to look for.

I've known her for ONLY a week. The third time we met, we went out for coffee and talked for a few hrs until she had to go. Earlier that same day, I found out she had a bf only when my friend brought up his gf at another college (the SAME college my interest's bf attends). That was the only time she has ever mentioned her bf, but during coffee she also casually brought him up twice.

I know shes comfortable with me (im pretty funny and we share interests), but I want to let her know that im INTERESTED in being more than just friends. I gave her a small bday present (nothing generic) recently so i guess that might be a hint. I have not met up with her since i gave her the present so i dont know what shes thinking now.

What else can i do? She has been with her bf since high school...they have been on and off but are together right now. I really want to date her though:rolleyes:
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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WC2

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bumblebee said:
basically ive been into this girl recently. shes really friendly and it seems that as long as you take the initiative to talk to her she will be friendly and engage in good conversation with you (based on my observation when other guys first meet her). The thing is that her being really nice and giggly a lot makes it seem that shes into you, when maybe shes not...i dont know what IOIs to look for.

I've known her for ONLY a week. The third time we met, we went out for coffee and talked for a few hrs until she had to go. Earlier that same day, I found out she had a bf only when my friend brought up his gf at another college (the SAME college my interest's bf attends). That was the only time she has ever mentioned her bf, but during coffee she also casually brought him up twice.

I know shes comfortable with me (im pretty funny and we share interests), but I want to let her know that im INTERESTED in being more than just friends. I gave her a small bday present (nothing generic) recently so i guess that might be a hint. I have not met up with her since i gave her the present so i dont know what shes thinking now.

What else can i do? She has been with her bf since high school...they have been on and off but are together right now. I really want to date her though:rolleyes:
You're in a very difficult situation.

Let's say she does go for you. What does that say about this woman's character? She's going to cheat on her boyfriend for you? What happens when you're in the same shoes as he once was?

I suggest you avoid buying presents for women who AREN'T your girlfriends. A present is a nice gesture from a FRIEND or a LOVER who has already created attraction and has RECEIVED it from the woman. Any woman I've been remotely successful with has bought me a present or done me a favor before I even thought about doing one for her.

So where do you go? I highly suggest you just drop the issue. To me it looks like you've dug yourself into the friendship hole and if you even get out, it won't be anytime soon.
 

Vendetta081789

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Agreed. She has mentioned her b/f to you, and in the given situation it looks like you're in the Friendship Zone for a long time good sir. Move on my man.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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From my experience most girls with boyfriends are genuinely friendly and want to make friends/ have fun but, don't want you. If a girl does have a boyfriend but, doesn't care for him anymore she will let you know. I would just respect their relationship and find a girl who is single. Unless, you think your game is good enough to knock her boyfriend out the picture...
 

bumblebee

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am i in the friendship hole BECAUSE i bought her that little gift? or..b/c she already has a bf. she is really fun to hang out with and i would like to hang out with her more, but will this get myself even deeper into the hole? how do i prevent that?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Vendetta081789

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You are in the hole because she mentioned her b/f and you continued talking instead of walking away. You didn't let her know you were interested. ON TOP OF THAT, you bought her a gift which she took from a friend, whether that's what you intended or not. You cannot prevent this hole from getting deeper.

On a side note. You have made good friends with what seems to be a great woman. Great women tend to have 1 or 2 great friends. She would EASILY put in a good word for you. Think it over, because your chances with her are toast.

Sorry Mate <3
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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First, don't set your goals in winning her over. Cause if you can't you are gonna be moping around wishing you could be with her. Go after single girls and game them! But, if you really want to try and get wit her. Just be C&F with her, use the push-pull technique, don't see her too much, be the alpha male and all that good stuff.
 

Vendetta081789

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I.A.F.Y.B. is very correct. I speak with a stronger sense of laziness however. I can assure you, the woman you speak of is not worth the risks, headache, and effort required to win her over.
 

Viking25

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Bumblebee....escalate with her as soon as you can. Girls cheat all the time!..And you don't know her relationship..maybe she is tired of her bf?..You can only get rejected here...but at least you will have a satisfaction of knowing that you tried!
 

Huffman

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bumblebee said:
The thing is that her being really nice and giggly a lot makes it seem that shes into you, when maybe shes not...i dont know what IOIs to look for.
DAMN I hate that kind of girl! I know what you mean. You begin to fall for them if you really should next them.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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The b/f g/f concept is an artificial paradigm in today's artificial illusionary construct - the reality today is the pimp/hor reality - why is a girl "seeing" you if she is "taken"? Because she is not a girl - and hors are never "taken"!!
 

Bonhomme

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Last Man Standing said:
The b/f g/f concept is an artificial paradigm in today's artificial illusionary construct - the reality today is the pimp/hor reality - why is a girl "seeing" you if she is "taken"? Because she is not a girl - and hors are never "taken"!!
Unless you count "taken" by ones "charms" ....
 

Birdem

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Do not get with girls that have boyfriends. There are plenty of girls out there, why take a girl from someone that doesnt have much game as you. Why fight with another guy over his female? that's gotta be the most retarded thing ever. Leave this ***** be she got trouble written all over her. It's all on you though.
 

Gangster Of Love

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There's plenty of other hors to go around for everyone.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

DonGorgon

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Same old story.... which is why women are so hard to deal with these days ... when you have a girlfriend she will usually have many more people after her than you have after you and this causes her value to be higher than your and her respect level to be low for all but the richest most good looking men,,,
 

JackPrescott

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Vendetta081789 said:
Agreed. She has mentioned her b/f to you, and in the given situation it looks like you're in the Friendship Zone for a long time good sir. Move on my man.
"LJBF"....go running the opposite direction.
 
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