she flirts with everyone... except you

[Bradshaw]

Can anyone explain to me why some girls flirt with everyone except you as a way to spark your interest?
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Here is my scenario:
I joke around with this girl from school a lot (her name is Jen, aged 20). Text book DJ stuff. Perfect application of ****y & funny on her. She is eating it up. Laughs at all my jokes (even the questionably funny ones). At school I always catch her looking at me, then she looks down or away when I catch her. I am the only guy at school she really talks to (therefore I assumed that she wasn't an attention wh o r e). Her best friend came up to me and was inquiring if I was single. I said to her "Did Jen send you to find out?" (with a big grin on my face) Her friend says "OMG, don't mention to her that I talked to you.. she'll kill me!" Then her friend starts laying hints that I should ask Jen out.

Later that day I run into Jen. I say "Me and my friends are going to Club ____ on friday, you should join us. It'll be fun." She enthusiatically agrees. In my mind all is going well.

Friday: I see her at the club with her friend. Jen says hello with mild enthusiasm. Then immediately begins flirting with my friends. And I mean flirting. Big time. Embarassing-for-me-type-flirting. I am usually not the jelous type but this was over the top. She ignored me most of the night, and then began flirting with other guys near by (because my friends, being good friends, were not reciprocating her childish behaviour). At the end of the night I leave the club without saying good bye to her.

Monday: I sit on the opposite side of the lecture hall, and avoid eye contact. At the end of the day Jen's friend comes up to my and asks "Why didn't you call Jen over the weekend? Are you not attracted to her? What's the problem? She really wants to hear from you." I say "You've gotta be kidding me, she was all over every guy in the room... except me." Her friend says "oh... that. She just gets shy around you and doesn't know how to act."
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Don't worry, I don't have oneitis or anything. This girl is now on my permant NEXT list. I don't need people in my life who play childish games. It's just that this situation just confused the hell out of me.

Here is what I would like to know:

-did she serious think that acting like this is going to make me try to win her over? To me it was a MAJOR turn off to watch her all over other guys.

-is this an isolated incident or do you guys ever encouter this? This was a first for me.

-female members of sosuave what do you think. Wyldfire, I read in one of your posts, that girls often ignore the guy that they are interested in and flirt with other guys. My question is, why? It seems counter productive to me.

 

[JaguarMike]

Don't totally next her because you can get some great sex out of it. She's playing a game, but she is totally confused and doen'st know how to act to get her way. This is why being a totally confident ****y funny alpha male will throw these types of chicks off because they're not use to dealing with real men. She seriously needs to stop reading cosmo, stop watching sex in the city, and stop being a baby. But, who cares enough to change her. My solution is try to get her one on one, make a move, hopefully bang her and she will be on the chain. Look for other girls for relationship material, keep this one for masterbation tool material, because this one seems immature and most of the time immature girls are stupid. Good luck.

 

[Scought]

Bradshaw, I wish I could offer some magic words to help your situation.

But, I can only relate to this situation.

Went out drinking with a friend at some girls place. We are all having fun. This girl is hangin with me, buying me drinks, and we have a ton of interest. Things are going great!

She tells me I act like an ******* sometimes. BUt she is attracted to azzholes.

I think its funny.

Next thing I knew. Her 'guy' friend comes over. Her friends tell me that he is just a friend.

Whatever. I try and be social with the dude, but he doesnt really have much to say to me.
Too bad.

When he and his buddy arrive I might as well have been a fly on the wall. I was just invisible. My other friends had gone hottubing, so we walk back to her apartment, walk in the door, and im thinking OK some alone time.
2 seconds later the guys walk-in.
So, its two guys I dont know and a girl taht goes way back with them. It sucks.

It went for hot to cold in milliseconds. It was interesting. And it sucked.

I know how you feel though. Half of me doesnt want to give up yet, the other half already has.

I think I let me emotions take over.
When i was being ignored, i just chilled and didnt speak until someone had something to say.

I sulked a bit. Could have put on a happy face, but her guy 'friend' was just a prick to me.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

-did she serious think that acting like this is going to make me try to win her over? To me it was a MAJOR turn off to watch her all over other guys.

Girls believe it works because it works on some guys and she has taken that same advice from other girls

-is this an isolated incident or do you guys ever encouter this? This was a first for me.

Same o Same o. I start thinking about other girls when they do that to me, or I don't take them seriously.

 

[Evangenlion]

I wouldn't totaly next her either. From the way she acted that night, its a definite sign that you ****ed up and she just doesn't know how the game should be played.

you guys read all these methods and believe that all girls would react the same way the methods stated. if you believe that then your all idiots.

no one is preprogramed to react to a written formula. welcome to the real world.

i was in the same situation, however i didn't **** up. the girl was at a house party, very boring, she didn't expect me to be at the party and was all shocked and ****e.

i went about with my friends to have a drink, she then started talking to my friends and cus my friends are flirtatious, it made it seem like she was flirting with my friends. she wasn't , she was just trying to find a way to get close to me. very sweet.

now most you guys are gonna be AFc about it and think wtf, why is she doing this, why is she.... and so on.

i could have been like the rest of u guys and run to SS and start beatching and moaning about her.

but unlike you guys, i'm a very emotional person. i took my time and opened a chance for me to have her all to my self. i did notice she was extremely shy and nervous around me.....aaww it was so cute.

i switched off C&F and went to a serious mode.

me: you like me!
her: what?
me: no, i meant....you love me (serious and romantic tone)
her: errrrr..well...you see...
me: (kiss)
her: (kiss back).

some of u guys need to understand the mind of a chick.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Bradshaw
Can anyone explain to me why some girls flirt with everyone except you as a way to spark your interest?
------------------
Here is my scenario:
I joke around with this girl from school a lot (her name is Jen, aged 20). Text book DJ stuff. Perfect application of ****y & funny on her. She is eating it up. Laughs at all my jokes (even the questionably funny ones). At school I always catch her looking at me, then she looks down or away when I catch her. I am the only guy at school she really talks to (therefore I assumed that she wasn't an attention wh o r e). Her best friend came up to me and was inquiring if I was single. I said to her "Did Jen send you to find out?" (with a big grin on my face) Her friend says "OMG, don't mention to her that I talked to you.. she'll kill me!" Then her friend starts laying hints that I should ask Jen out.

Later that day I run into Jen. I say "Me and my friends are going to Club ____ on friday, you should join us. It'll be fun." She enthusiatically agrees. In my mind all is going well.

Friday: I see her at the club with her friend. Jen says hello with mild enthusiasm. Then immediately begins flirting with my friends. And I mean flirting. Big time. Embarassing-for-me-type-flirting. I am usually not the jelous type but this was over the top. She ignored me most of the night, and then began flirting with other guys near by (because my friends, being good friends, were not reciprocating her childish behaviour). At the end of the night I leave the club without saying good bye to her.

Monday: I sit on the opposite side of the lecture hall, and avoid eye contact. At the end of the day Jen's friend comes up to my and asks "Why didn't you call Jen over the weekend? Are you not attracted to her? What's the problem? She really wants to hear from you." I say "You've gotta be kidding me, she was all over every guy in the room... except me." Her friend says "oh... that. She just gets shy around you and doesn't know how to act."
----------------


Don't worry, I don't have oneitis or anything. This girl is now on my permant NEXT list. I don't need people in my life who play childish games. It's just that this situation just confused the hell out of me.

Here is what I would like to know:

-did she serious think that acting like this is going to make me try to win her over? To me it was a MAJOR turn off to watch her all over other guys.

-is this an isolated incident or do you guys ever encouter this? This was a first for me.

-female members of sosuave what do you think. Wyldfire, I read in one of your posts, that girls often ignore the guy that they are interested in and flirt with other guys. My question is, why? It seems counter productive to me.

She's pretty young and may not have much experience in knowing how to attract a guy she likes. If she perceives you as playing "hard to get" it could be that she was trying to do the same thing...while also showing you that she is desirable to other guys. There was probably some nervousness mixed in too.

The maturity level of this girl seems pretty 8th grade-ish with how she keeps sending her friend to talk to you for her.

If you want to deal with her immaturity then give her another chance...but you should be prepared to be driven up the wall with the childish antics as a tradeoff.

 

[BxPrince24]

I don't know what to say. But I nexted the girl who was doing something similar to this with me.

She flirted with the rest of the boys in the school, she's a popular chick, but she never flirted with me. I'm was pretty popular and I was the type of guy who gets waved and called to on the way to class instead of the one doing the waving.

Anyways, I tried to get with her, got her number and set up a date, day before the date I tried calling her to go over specifics such as what time to be there, but she never picked up and she never mentioned it when I saw her again.

She'd always come over and check out my art work when I brought it in and I'd catch her out of the corner of my eye looking at me sometimes when I'm in class then when I look back she'd look away. She never gave me a hug, a kiss on the cheek, nothing yet she'd do it with everybody else. So I just got fed up one day and said fvck it. I couldn't bother with it anymore. Maybe my game wasn't tight enough, but I am who I am, if she can't accept that then to hell with her.