"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

She does the disappearing trick -- then contacts me a month later

guitaronfire411

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 30, 2005
Messages
283
Reaction score
3
Location
--
I had a cute girl contact me near the end of February who I do not know. She seemed to have super high interest -- she blabbed about meeting at a party she was going to the following weekend and wanted us to go out for drinks, etc. -- and then never replied after I told her to let me know more before the end of that week.

Now, as far as I can tell, the same girl has returned. The previous girl had a different name under her previous e-mail address, so it's strange that (if it is indeed the same girl) she is suddenly calling herself by a different name. (ie. two different names, two different e-mail addresses)

Usually getting angry is instant death for a Don Juan. So I have yet to reply to this girl who wants to meet up. How do I prevent her from flaking on me? Should I just move on? This is unknown territory for me but my instincts say to play it cool and get more concrete contact information.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
Treat her as if she's a completely different girl, however meet her offline ASAP. If she balks, next her. This should be the case with anyone you meet online, no time for pen pals here.
 

insomniac

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2004
Messages
211
Reaction score
3
Location
MN
How did this girl know to contact you? Online personals? Through a friend? Need more info.

Sounds like a cam-***** scam to me. They claim to know you or have seen you before, and express very high interest in meeting you. If you don't respond, they'll just spam you later with the same message but a different name.
 

guitaronfire411

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 30, 2005
Messages
283
Reaction score
3
Location
--
The original girl claimed to be using her friend's Myspace and came across mine.

The fact that the girl mentions that we talked about a month ago seems to indicate to me that it is the same girl.... But girls are notorious for lying to get what they want. ;)

She sent along a picture with her current message, so it's not likely a bot.
 

insomniac

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 13, 2004
Messages
211
Reaction score
3
Location
MN
Still sounds dubious. Tell her to give you her phone number, and then call to verify she's for real (or give her your number). If she's interested enough to track you down on myspace and initiate, she shouldn't have a problem with that.
If she does, I wouldn't waste another thought on her.

Personally, I wouldn't expect to ever meet her. Girls that tend to come out of nowhere online and get excited about you tend to disappear just as quickly. And, she did flake once already. Good luck regardless...
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Top