"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

she chases me and then rejects when ask her out..???

J

joker79

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 25, 2012
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
guys this is the situation: mixed messages with this girl, she's becoming my nightmare.

1) we had sex month ago and then i pushed too much for a LTR, she felt the pressure and she backed off. Fine. Gone.
2) today: after 3-4 months and some makeout session with her, now i'm outcome detached and usually I don't contact her. At some point in time she starts to consistently chasing me and even ask me for some coffees dates (don't know how to call them). She sends messages with kisses and cute contents, she wants to know what I'm doing and how I spend my time. I can touch her ass without any problem.
3) I usually answer politely to her messages and to test her I ask her out quite quickly. she either doesn't answer or give me some non verifiable excuses (busy with work, bla bla bla). Fine. She's not interested, she won't contact me anymore, she's not worth it.
4) I go NC, she starts again to contact me quite quickly. repeat step 2-3-4

Honestly I don't know what's in her mind, i stopped to ask myself questions, just living day by day and am outcome detached. Probably a new girl will help me getting out of this situation and/or convince her to be less confusing. My question is: is there any chance to get laid with this kind of girl (if so, how, meeting her and ask for a real time date?) or shall I say to her "stop it because we're not going anywhere". I know she likes me a lot, she likes what am doing and my personality. not enough probably? she's really too busy? who knows. NC doesn't work well and I'm not really the guy that ignores people...
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

1

1-800-HellNo

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2013
Messages
114
Reaction score
3
I guess you could try not answering her questions, for starters.
She's (probably) asking you that stuff to make sure you are still available, etc.
Girls want what they can't have, people say it, but i've seen it to be true.

when she thinks she can't have you, she will be all over you.
Wait a month, or more, with minimum contact. if she asks about your "relationship" with her, just say stuff like "i like the way things are now" or something (not exactly sure about this). The key is to make her think you aren't interested in her.

Next time there is a good party or concert, after a month or so, text her "hey come to ____ it should be pretty fun."
 
I

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
joker79 said:
guys this is the situation: mixed messages with this girl, she's becoming my nightmare.

1) we had sex month ago and then i pushed too much for a LTR, she felt the pressure and she backed off. Fine. Gone.
2) today: after 3-4 months and some makeout session with her, now i'm outcome detached and usually I don't contact her. At some point in time she starts to consistently chasing me and even ask me for some coffees dates (don't know how to call them). She sends messages with kisses and cute contents, she wants to know what I'm doing and how I spend my time. I can touch her ass without any problem.
3) I usually answer politely to her messages and to test her I ask her out quite quickly. she either doesn't answer or give me some non verifiable excuses (busy with work, bla bla bla). Fine. She's not interested, she won't contact me anymore, she's not worth it.
4) I go NC, she starts again to contact me quite quickly. repeat step 2-3-4

Honestly I don't know what's in her mind, i stopped to ask myself questions, just living day by day and am outcome detached. Probably a new girl will help me getting out of this situation and/or convince her to be less confusing. My question is: is there any chance to get laid with this kind of girl (if so, how, meeting her and ask for a real time date?) or shall I say to her "stop it because we're not going anywhere". I know she likes me a lot, she likes what am doing and my personality. not enough probably? she's really too busy? who knows. NC doesn't work well and I'm not really the guy that ignores people...
Click to expand...

She wasn't chasing YOU she was chasing your ATTENTION.

Look.....just go to the bottom of this reply and click on the word "THIS!".


It'll explain what's going on and how to deal with it.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

F

floydb25

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2011
Messages
1,762
Reaction score
108
Location
NC
She's either a tease, AW, immature game-player, or she has shallow emotions and is addicted to the chase. Either way, you're never going to catch her - because as soon as you show or reciprocate interest - she backs off. She could also have ego and control issues.

You can't really win with people like this. IME, they're immature, bratty, spoiled, and stuck up. Once they gain the upper-hand - they never want to lose it... At the same time, they don't really want you. Even though they lost interest - they still get their kicks and feed their ego by toying with weak, gullible guys. Most of them are passive-aggressive *****es, and tend to be hot (hence getting away with it). They never really tell anyone they lost interest - for ego, attention, and controlling purposes. They usually have low self-esteem, too, and chase those who don't want or respect them.

Waste of time. They shouldn't be doing this, and you shouldn't be allowing it. If they can't get away with it - they won't. You also shouldn't be feeling like this - because it's not normal or healthy. Only immature, shallow, fleeting *****es with no respect act this way.

Don't assume she's confused, make up excuses, think you still have a chance, over-analyze every detail, and all this nonsense, either. Don't get tangled up in the mind-****. She lost interest, and is now toying with you... Assuming she ever HAD any genuine interest to begin with. But stuck up *****es don't give second chances or regain interest. It's all about the ego and control.
 
R

Robert28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
5,005
Reaction score
5,309
holy crap, man I had this same thing happen to me! This girl claimed she was "all into me" but when I'd ask her out she was always "busy". so I left her alone after asking her out 3 times and getting 3 different excuses. she texts me the other night and says "I'm tired of always making the first move. man up and make plans with me. be a man!" or something to that effect. I wanted to say "look here you stupid b!tch, I asked you out 3 times and you turned me down 3 times with some lame b.s. excuse so screw you!". I just ignored her though. I knew something wasn't right with this girl when I first started talking to her and she insisted that I hear about the guy before me who "just wanted her for sex and how that's not what she's looking for". yeah right. too much effort for some probably average sex in my opinion.
 
F

floydb25

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2011
Messages
1,762
Reaction score
108
Location
NC
Robert28 said:
holy crap, man I had this same thing happen to me! This girl claimed she was "all into me" but when I'd ask her out she was always "busy". so I left her alone after asking her out 3 times and getting 3 different excuses. she texts me the other night and says "I'm tired of always making the first move. man up and make plans with me. be a man!" or something to that effect. I wanted to say "look here you stupid b!tch, I asked you out 3 times and you turned me down 3 times with some lame b.s. excuse so screw you!". I just ignored her though. I knew something wasn't right with this girl when I first started talking to her and she insisted that I hear about the guy before me who "just wanted her for sex and how that's not what she's looking for". yeah right. too much effort for some probably average sex in my opinion.
Click to expand...
Same... They always act oblivious to what they're doing - literally as they're doing it - and try to blame you for everything. These tend to be the schemers, connivers, and manipulators, as well. It's all games - with the intent of gaining control. They don't want you to prove how genuine you are - they want you to be the *****, and do all the work - while they feed you scraps and do all the deciding. This is also why they act like they're courting you, and looking for relationships - when they're really just controlling sluts with daddy issues.

**** 'em.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

J

joker79

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 25, 2012
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
Update: you were right Igetit!, NC for 3 days and she contacted me back nicely asking how i was, what my plans for the weekend are and stuff like that, as if she had in her mind the "I don't know what to talk about but I want to check if you're interested". My reaction was neutral, no hint at all to spend time together and some ****y and funny answers, nothing more than that. I didn't ask anything about her neither how she will spend her time. I'll keep using this strategy, let's see where I go with it. I fell like if I show some interest she will drop me like a rock. Definitely not a LTR material at this stage
 
3

3countriesPlan

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2007
Messages
671
Reaction score
29
Location
Beijing/Seoul/Portland
What is the point of even entertaining a girl like this. Its the classic dangle the carrot routine where you jump and she wins. And then she keeps doing it for some stupid reason ( she assumes you will keep jumping ).

Its like this. You want to go outside. You see two doors. The nice shiny red one is your favorite so you keep trying to go out that door. Its open real real wide for ya but when you get close it magically shuts itself. Why would you keep trying that door when the other one (another cooler girl) is open and doesn't shut thereby allowing you to easily accomplish your goal?
 
T

Tiguere

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 15, 2009
Messages
1,036
Reaction score
85
joker79 said:
Update: you were right Igetit!, NC for 3 days and she contacted me back nicely asking how i was, what my plans for the weekend are and stuff like that, as if she had in her mind the "I don't know what to talk about but I want to check if you're interested". My reaction was neutral, no hint at all to spend time together and some ****y and funny answers, nothing more than that. I didn't ask anything about her neither how she will spend her time. I'll keep using this strategy, let's see where I go with it. I fell like if I show some interest she will drop me like a rock. Definitely not a LTR material at this stage
Click to expand...
how did she contacted you?????? it seems like you responded. .. well if she only texted and you replied you still weak chump. ONLY RESPOND TO A PHONE CALL
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top