She begins witholding sex

[Sp1kez]

Ok I have found myself in a dilemma...my gf of 5 months stopped having sex with me, she said that Im a pervert and that I want sex too much and that she is not sure if im with her for sex or for her. She said that we're not having sex until we get married, which is total bull because we already had it...

My question is , what should I do?

Should I just dump her, or should I spend less time with her or what do I do in order to get sex back? Theres really no point in me going over to her house anymore but I dont want her to see thru that im not going because shes withholding sex from me....help?

 

[KontrollerX]

Dump her.

A chick that uses sex as a bargaining chip to get what she wants and as a means of manipulation is not worth a long term relationship much less marriage.

Doing this is underhanded, a sign of immaturity and a very sad alternative to having true communication with you about how she is feeling.

Its good for you she revealed her true colors to you before you went out and bought the ring and wasted all that money on a manipulator.

 

[Krassus]

Rrrruuuunnnnnnnn!!!!

 

[spider_007]

1) how often have you been doing it.
2) how do you treat her in the bedroom. do you make her feel like a slut all the time, or do you make love to her entire body and mind utill she rolls her eyes and screams and shakes like she is having sezzure (sp?)

 

[Stem]

She is bored...
You no longer make her horny...

The problem is YOU... not her..:nono:

Fix the problem.. not the symptoms..

Stem.

 

[Tomatoes]

She is trying to make YOU break up with her. Stay with her for social proof until you find a diffrent girl then get rid of her like shes the plague.

Sarge On!

 

[Jariel]

If she enjoyed sex with you, the last thing she would want to do is stop!

A lot of guys have no real clue how to please a woman and just jump in there and fvck like a pornstar. Women generally don't enjoy this and sex becomes something they do to keep their man. If this sounds like you, then I suggest doing a lot of reading up on how to sexually excite and please your woman.

Alternatively, she might be testing you to see if there's more to your relationship than sex. Many women (especially in relationships) need to feel an emotional connection as much as a man needs sex. It's the "give and take" that all relationships need to survive. She's basically saying that if you refuse to satisfy her emotional needs, then she's not going to satisfy your sexual needs.

However, if you don't have feelings for her and cannot give her the affection she needs, then it is probably best for both of you to end the relationship. She can find someone who meets her needs and you can find someone who meets your's.

 

[mountain]

If she enjoyed sex with you, the last thing she would want to do is stop!

A lot of guys have no real clue how to please a woman and just jump in there and fvck like a pornstar. Women generally don't enjoy this and sex becomes something they do to keep their man. If this sounds like you, then I suggest doing a lot of reading up on how to sexually excite and please your woman.

Alternatively, she might be testing you to see if there's more to your relationship than sex. Many women (especially in relationships) need to feel an emotional connection as much as a man needs sex. It's the "give and take" that all relationships need to survive. She's basically saying that if you refuse to satisfy her emotional needs, then she's not going to satisfy your sexual needs.

However, if you don't have feelings for her and cannot give her the affection she needs, then it is probably best for both of you to end the relationship. She can find someone who meets her needs and you can find someone who meets your's.

Some of what you are suggesting seems to contradict the dj mentality... or perhaps there's a paradox here that can work. While i get your meaning somewhat, How would he go about giving this girl the emotional connection she desires if the dj mentality is to remain somewhat distanced.

It's my understanding that women don't really want a man who will get all mushy and connect, and that it could very well be a test to see if you will remain a man in the face of her pressure. She could be testing to see if you have other options. If you come placating her then you obviously lack options, which is unnattractive but if you leave, even as a bluff, then she sees your value.

 

[Latinoman]

Ok I have found myself in a dilemma...my gf of 5 months stopped having sex with me, she said that Im a pervert and that I want sex too much and that she is not sure if im with her for sex or for her. She said that we're not having sex until we get married, which is total bull because we already had it...

My question is , what should I do?

Should I just dump her, or should I spend less time with her or what do I do in order to get sex back? Theres really no point in me going over to her house anymore but I dont want her to see thru that im not going because shes withholding sex from me....help?

Dump her.

She is using sex as a manipulative tool. If she is using it now...then you can rest assure she will use it even AFTER you are married ("I'm holding sex until you buy me a house"..."I'm holding sex until you take me to Paris").

 

[Latinoman]

1) how often have you been doing it.
2) how do you treat her in the bedroom. do you make her feel like a slut all the time, or do you make love to her entire body and mind utill she rolls her eyes and screams and shakes like she is having sezzure (sp?)

That has NOTHING to do with that. She is using sex to manipulate him. She is a manipulator. Plain and simple.

When a woman stops sex with a man the way she did...you can rest assure that you can be the GREATEST lover in the world...that is not going to satisfy her as much as the ability to MANIPULATE her man.

 

[Latinoman]

Alternatively, she might be testing you to see if there's more to your relationship than sex. Many women (especially in relationships) need to feel an emotional connection as much as a man needs sex. It's the "give and take" that all relationships need to survive. .

I don't disagree with the quote above.

She's basically saying that if you refuse to satisfy her emotional needs, then she's not going to satisfy your sexual needs.

But I disagree with the second quote. Why? Because she was very CLEAR about one thing: no sex until marriage. She is BLACKMAILING him into a marriage. She WANTS to marry him. But she wants to make sure he asks her. And she is using something he enjoys a lot to MANIPULATE him. She enjoys the sex too...but she wants marriage (security) more. And she is a MANIPULATOR too.

 

[thefonz]

She is trying to make YOU break up with her. Stay with her for social proof until you find a diffrent girl then get rid of her like shes the plague.

Sarge On!

I agree

 

[whistler]

I'm in agreement with Latinoman...

This is manipulative bvllsh!t.

The act is less important than what it reveals about her personality:

1. She's immature and manipulative.
2. She will continue to be.

There are better women than this.

 

[flexion_]

Ignore what she is saying. Just go by what she is doing (or in your case not doing). She wants a relationship without sex for whatever reason ie. friend.

And with that you probably have enough friends so just give her the boot. If you give in and change yourself for her then all that is going to happen is that you will be her little servant. Time to move on IMO.