"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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sharp lower back pain from deadlift

mrRuckus

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I completely disagree with any nonsense about completely resting ANYTHING. Study after study, personal experience, and anecdotes from numerous others all show that using something that's injured heals it better and quicker. No one says go do a 500 lb deadlift but lying around like an invalid is a bad idea.



backbreaker, light reverse hyperextensions are supposed to work wonders for curing lower back problems and relieving pain.

High rep good mornings with just the bar are used to heal injuries too. It's good to move joints. Joints heal faster when moved. High reps will flood your lower back with blood too.

I remember a post by iron addict where he'd injured his back pretty seriously and he did good mornings like 3 times a day for 50 reps with just the bar.



rippetoe said:
You can do your own spinal decompression. There are many sources of info on this on the web. It may work well, it may not. But I have heard from lots of people that nothing help their disc problems as much as a return to barbell training.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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backbreaker

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you mean like that little back extension machine at the gym?

it's getting easier and easier to deal with. I went and got a 2 hour massage yesterday and it did wonders on just being able to move around. I was at the grocery store yesterday and I damn near cried I was in so much pain. i will get another one later today and if by the weekend it's feeling well enough I will start doing the bike, which i am going to do anyway, then do the extensions like you said, then probably play the rest by ear as far as what my body is telling me.
 

speed dawg

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mrRuckus said:
I completely disagree with any nonsense about completely resting ANYTHING. Study after study, personal experience, and anecdotes from numerous others all show that using something that's injured heals it better and quicker. No one says go do a 500 lb deadlift but lying around like an invalid is a bad idea.

backbreaker, light reverse hyperextensions are supposed to work wonders for curing lower back problems and relieving pain.

High rep good mornings with just the bar are used to heal injuries too. It's good to move joints. Joints heal faster when moved. High reps will flood your lower back with blood too.

I remember a post by iron addict where he'd injured his back pretty seriously and he did good mornings like 3 times a day for 50 reps with just the bar.
I agree, but it depends on the injury. If it's indeed a herniated disc, hypers won't do a thing. You shouldn't be bending at all. I know. The fact that you suggested this tells me you have no experience with real back problems.
 

backbreaker

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oh yeah, having your GF try to ride you while you have a bad back = FTL
 

Quiksilver

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Ruckus don't even bother, its not worth trying to change someones mind when they already have it made up.


Guys, I've been on the good and bad side of back injuries, twice, and I know which method works and which doesn't. Bed rest and avoidance of the injury DO NOT make it heal. That's why older guys have persistent back pains, because they injured their lower back at some point(due to lack of training it), and then avoided active healing.


The absolute best way to heal a back injury is this:

1. rest for 2-7 days. Rest means ice packs/heat packs/spinal decompressions/etc.

2. Light activity for 14-28 days. Walking, biking, swimming, hiking, stretching, yoga, any activity works. The purpose here is to get blood flowing to the injured spot, and to loosen muscles. It's the tightened muscles which cause the pain and disrupt proper healing. Keep active and do whatever light activity you can that doesn't put pressure on your spine.

3. Moderate activity for 14-28 days. Go to the doctor and get an MRI done to assess the healing and see if you're good to start lifting freeweights and running(puts a lot of pressure on the lower back). If you're alright and the healing is good, start lifting weights and doing hyperextensions/good mornings/etc. for back rehab. keep them light and low rep to start, then light and high rep once you're into it. Bodyweight exercises and light weights are your friends here.

4. Heavy activity. If you've done all the necessary steps to ensure good recovery, then after two months your back should be good to go heavy again. As always, start light and work back into your routine slowly. Don't be in a hurry to regain your old strength, it'll come back on its own. If you take it too hard, you can reinjure yourself and you're back to square one or worse.

If after two months your back still isn't healed sufficiently to lift weights, go back to the doctors and consider surgery.

Remember, it's the muscle that protects the ligaments, and the ligaments protect your discs, so avoiding strengthening your back is asking for more trouble. It should be top priority, if you want to avoid back injuries(or heal them), to do deadlifts/good mornings/hyperextensions/stiff-leg deadlifts/etc.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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