"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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sharp lower back pain from deadlift

backbreaker

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was dead lifting yesterday and on the way up I got a sharp pain in my back, not the kind when you are out of shape and trying to get back in shape.. I mean it's pretty sharp. I tried to sleep it off but it still hurts so I will go to the doctor tomorrow. But anyway, I t hink I need to lay off the deadlifts / squats for a couple of weeks at least. Any exercises that come anywhere near what these do that I can replace them with?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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picard

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you really need to see a chiropractor to check out your spine. you might have a dislocated disk. It is serious if you don't fix the problem.

A dislocated disk can put pressure on your spinal nerve leading to swelling which require surgery.
 

backbreaker

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i know. i was hoping It was just some soreness that was going to go away, but i haven't been sore in a while and this is a different type. it's not sore, it hurts. i barley could get out of bed today. so yeah, i'm going to have to go see someone tomorrow. but like i said, when i start back, I am going to lay off of those for a while, are there any other exercises I can do instead?
 

Jesus

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serious question- is a chiropractor really the right person to see when you have a serious back concern? I mean, shouldn't you be seeing a real doctor?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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backbreaker

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the guy is right on the money actually, it's probably a slipped disk and if that is th case yes I need to see a chriopractor. that's really the only thing that can hurt like this.
 

speed dawg

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No, dude. Slipped disc = stay the fvck away from the chiropractor. Your statement couldn't be more wrong. A chiropractor will take your money and tell you all day that he's helping you when in reality, they really only help if your have a minor problem ie spine and muscles out of alignment. For an injured disc, ESPECIALLY one you may have hurt by jarring movement, you need to be in decompression therapy and you need to lay off ALL weight training that compresses your spine. Ice and taking it easy.

Go see your family doctor and let him recommend a good orthopaedic surgeon/pain doctor/neurosurgeon.

I know all of this from experience. I wish I had known all this back then. Like you, I continued to want to lift weights. Very very ignorant.
 

Bible_Belt

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When the body feels that the spine might be in danger, it's reflex is to tighten the muscles around the spine as a protective measure. Back pain almost always comes from the muscles around your spine, and not your actual spine. The reflex tightening tends to last at least a few days. A doctor won't do much until you have hurt for a while, other than tell you to apply ice and take ibuprofen as an anti-inflammatory.

Some foods are considered anti-inflammatory as well. Salmon and fish oil come to mind, there are others.
 

speed dawg

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I felt the pain, thought it was just tight muscles, like BBelt said. Kept lifting, etc. until I couldn't take it anymore. Got diagnosed, went through some pain blocks, suffered for another 1.5 years, had the surgery, recovering quite well now even though I have nerve damage because I was stupid in the beginning stages.

Go see a doctor before you do anything. And rest your back. My whole bodybuilding hobby almost went into the toilet because of my injury. I hurt it in Spring of '07 and I'm just now getting back to exercising regularly. And I probably won't ever do spine compressing lifts again, ever.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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backbreaker

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damn. yeah i'll take the rest of the month off as far as weight sgo, and i'm going to the doctor as soon as my gf gets back. i'll le tyou know what he says.
 

SamMalone

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How much and often do you deadlift/squat? You probably overtrained.
 

backbreaker

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It's a slipped disk.

I have been doing the same routine for about 2 and a half years now. I hit the weights about 3 times a week. Usually Tuesday, Thursdays and either Saturday or Sunday, one of the two days. I went in on sunday. I think more than anything it was me using bad form. I don't overtrain. if anything I probably could add a day to my routine, but it works like it is now fine.
 

Quiksilver

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Usually it's a bad muscle strain or minor tear, or a minor ligament sprain.

Keep doing light exercise and work back into it slowly, could be as much as 4-6 weeks to recover enough to lift heavy.

I injured my back in Nov. 07 and it pretty much felt like how you mentioned.

The pain is the muscle around the injury tightening and pulling on nerves, seizing up to prevent further injury.

Just do real light workouts and see what you can/can't do... Then do what you can.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Michele l'Arcangelo

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My advice isn't professional of course, and I'm no way a doctor or even close to being one yet, but I used to have a massive pain in my leg and lower back. This is just from what I've recently self-learned.

I went to a doctor and they never gave it a name. They just told me it was a nerve being pinched... they didn't care to explain it more than that. They just gave me asprin. Didn't help. This was when I was playing soccer in high school.

Few years later, and being getting more interested in health care and medical stuff, I was reading some medical books and basic Anatomy & Physiology textbooks on my own. I came across a part about the spinal nerves and figured I'd read some of it, since I still have minor pain in my legs and lower back at times. Then I went on to do a bit more research on it.

Are you having pain radiate into your leg and feet?

I don't believe it's a muscle strain or tear. Nerve pain is usually described as being really sharp, and he emphasized it being really sharp.

It sounds like you have a spinal disc herniation (which is the medical term for slipped-disc... since 'slipped-disc' isn't an accurate name at all, since the disc doesn't actually slip out of place). To get an small idea of what that is, make an 'O' with your thumb and pointer finger, like you're doing an "okay" sign. Now stick your other hands pointer finger there.

The 'O' is your spinal cord, and the other hand's pointer finger is the nerve.

Now if you squeezed your other hand's pointer finger in that O, that's what's happening to your spine. Your nerve is being sqeezed, or pinched. What happens is that the disc between the bone ruptures, causing the nucleus from the disc to be forced into the capsule where the nerves exist, causing pressure on the nerve.

You won't always have pain in your legs if you have a spinal disc herniation.

Do a Google search on the lumbar and sciatic nerve to get more of an idea.

The sciatic nerve is the largest nerve in your body that starts from the lower back to the leg and down to the foot.

No, do not train or do anything that will put pressure on your lower back. When I was in high school, I tried to keep up with my team by running, going to practice, and playing games until I was forced to sit out of it all. The pain just gets worse, and the pain just stays longer if you try to do physical activities with it.

Try doing workouts that won't strain your back, or will at least keep equal amounts of pressure on your back, like laying down or standing up instead of sitting down.

I hope you have a lot of time to recover, it takes months to heal. For me, I missed out on getting to start my entire soccer season. I only played when I insisted "I was okay".

Give yourself at least 1-3 months to recover.
 

backbreaker

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actually I did. it's a slipped disk. I start decompression thearpy monday.

that was not the whole point of this post however, I know when to go to the doctor and know to stop working out. when I do work out however, again, what are some alternatives to what I can do to squats and DL's?
 

speed dawg

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I do lots of lunges, they don't hurt my back at all. I don't used weight though, just body weight. The squatting motion irritates my back.

As far as back/deadlifts go, I abandoned that altogether. I pretty much only do variations of pullups now for back.

Basically my workouts post-herniated disc surgery consist of pushups, dips, handstand shoulder press, lunges, pullups, calf/forearm workouts, abs on exercise ball and walking/elliptical cardio. Simple basic bodyweight exercises. And I play golf and bike ride.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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