Sexual addiction...

[Ricky]

What do you think defines this in your mind? I know we could google search it, but the thought has run across my mine that if I struggle from any addiction it just might be sex.

Has anyone on here sought help for it? I am not kidding BTW.

I have had some great girlfriends, but the wandering eye that is perceived natural for guys to have has also led me to wander astray on a few of my girlfriends and also to constantly seek out new women. It is the thrill of variety.

The amount of time I have spent thinking about seducing and seducing women has been crazy.

Just wondering if anyone has ever sought help on here or known someone who has. Under what conditions should one seek help?

 

[Ice Cold]

Addiction is when you do something thinking that it will fulfill a need X, when in reality it doesn't.

So sex addiction then, is to try and substitute sex for intimacy... for example.

You're not a sex addict just because you screw a lot and like it. It lies in the reason you have sex.

If you have sex to get off and orgasm... it's normal.

If you have sex with someone to get attention... intimacy... or something else... then it's addiction.

You won't be satisfied with no amount of sex, you'll switch partners, try pervert/fetish stuff... etc...

Cheers

 

[seabreeze]

Ricky,

I just want to give you a good ol pat on the back and a supportive hug for opening yourself up like this here. i think it's the PERFECT environment to do it: among other men. I applaud you.

I do think that sexual addiction can be about intimacy needs, but it can ALSO be about a constant physical need to get off! i think it starts off with the intimacy need and develops into an actual physical need to orgasm, just like any other drug, the body grows physically addicted to it. That's when it truly spins out of control. That's when you masturbate too much, or require too much sex from your girl. The wandering eye thing seems totally about intimacy fears, not so much sexual addiction in my view. But, I'm very curious to see what the other fellas have to say about that.

Take me for instance. I am a very monogamous person, but I have the need to have LOT'S of sex! I don't sleep around and I'm very selective, but once I find a guy I want him constantly and the physical feeling of orgasm. My body just begins to react to the need even when my mind is not thinking about it! Would I qualify as a sexual addict? I don't think so. I'm a woman with a very, very high libido when I'm in a safe relationship. I literally want sex multiple times a day. I have yet to find a guy to get involved in a relationship with who understands my constant physical desire to make love with him. I don't demand it, but their knowledge of my willingness always seems to scare them after a while. Then, when I've lost all desire for them, that's when they want it, but by then it's too late. Once I lose my sexual desire for a man who didn't appreciate my sexual faithfulness and willingness, I never regain it.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Carry on.
SB

 

[seabreeze]

C'mon guys! No one has any advice for Ricky?
SB

 

[Ice Cold]

Seabreeze - have u actually told the guy that you wanna get off a few times a day? Or do you expect him to read your mind (We suck at it BTW)

 

[seabreeze]

Ice Cold,

I'm usually very non-vocal about my desire. But I'm sure that my non-vocal gestures were very clear. Eventually, I make my needs known vocally and respectfully. This is when the problems start. I think I have an uncanny knack for picking passive-aggressive men who withhold sex as some kind of punishment or something or to regain control. I used to think that something was wrong with me and that I was wrong for enjoying and desiring sex so much. But then I realized I'm normal, it's their problem. Thanks for asking, Ice Cold.

There's a site that defines sexual addiction very clearly I think: www.healthymind.com
SB

 

[Don Ronny]

I have a sexual addiction problem. I posted about it a long time ago. I typically need to bust a nut at least 4 to 5 times a day. I am currently seeing 2 girls steadily along with a few FBs on the side and its never enough!

Damn, all this talk about nymphomania is getting me all worked up...

Time to make the booty call!

In regards to your problem, I wish I could be more helpful *shrugs*

 

[seabreeze]

Hey Don! I don't consider myself a nympho because I have gone a long time without sex!!! And I'm easy to satisfy once I get it. Getting it on a consistent basis once I'm in a relationship is the problem.

And I think you might want to get some help for your addiction because it's only going to get worse as you get older.
SB

 

[Don Ronny]

Originally posted by seabreeze
I'm easy to satisfy once I get it. Getting it on a consistent basis once I'm in a relationship is the problem.

Maybe you are just a bad lay.

 

[seabreeze]

I've wondered that myself, but they insist the sex is awesome. Then when I loss interest, they practically rape me for it. I don't think you were here then, but earlier I posted about how each sexual partner I've had had premature ejac problems and couldn't last more than 3 min. I definitely think it's about control and the type of guy i keep choosing.
SB

 

[Don Ronny]

I seen your picture. you are hot. Let me school you in the ways of the Nympho Jedis!

 

[spidersense]

insanity, doing things a the same way expecting different results. This is AA's def. of insanity. If you can apply that to yourself, then you may have an addiction. Like if you've ever tried to stop but couldn't, and you try repeatedly doing and not doing the same things each time expecting that you won't hae sex again, then that's an addiction.

 

[Ice Cold]

Originally posted by seabreeze
I've wondered that myself, but they insist the sex is awesome. Then when I loss interest, they practically rape me for it. I don't think you were here then, but earlier I posted about how each sexual partner I've had had premature ejac problems and couldn't last more than 3 min. I definitely think it's about control and the type of guy i keep choosing.
SB

If it's 3 minutes, then you're not a bad lay.

If you also blow/swallow... then it's even better.

As for not being able to give it to you 5 times a day... I guess it's just male nature.

There were studies done on rats. A male rat and a female rat have been placed in a cage. After 2 days the male didn't respond to the female advances anymore, even though the female was basically pestering him.

When a new female was introduced into the cage, the male copulated actively for 1-2 days and then only occasionally after that.

Makes sense biologically. Males don't want to inject the same female with sperm... takes too much energy and is not needed.

So for seabreeze the only option would be 2-3 partners or that big 80$ dildo with a battery pack.

 

[seabreeze]

LOL @ Don. Hmmm, jedi nympho, sounds interesting...

Ice Cold,

what you've said has merit. Since I've only been with guys in long term relationships, it definitely seems like they got comfortable with the sex and desired it less because they knew that is was there all the time. I hear men complain about not getting sex in marriage, well I feel for them cuz I understand. My guys actually may have had a madonna/whoore complex going on too! Too bad for me, hunh.

Well, I don't do dildos. If there is one thing I'll admit to being addicted to it's the natural, flesh male organ---no imitations! But, thanks for your concern.
SB

 

[Don Ronny]

Originally posted by seabreeze
Hmmm, jedi nympho, sounds interesting...

Oh..it's quite eye-opening!

There's just one thing...I have never experimented with the dark side of the Force, so you will have to school me a lil somethin.

 

[Ricky]

Thanks for the posts guys.

I think the problem is that I have a higher than average libido and sometimes it kicks into overdrive.

I also feel bad that I had a relapse with an ex-gf that shouldn't have happened.

 

[KOSR]

Something tells me a lot of PUA's have sexual addiction.

You might want to search for some literature on repetative compulsive habits/behaviour.

Don't belief the idiots that say your brain is wired for addiction, they are... basically stupid.

 

[DjDreamer]

An addiction is a problem...

If you have an insatiable desire for sex and if your partner is satisfied and if you have other aspects of your life in order then how can that possibly be a problem?

 

[Ricky]

Ok the hardcore sexual addiction is kickign in again.

I have a great girlfriend, probably is right now she's living in another town and probably will until fall.

In the meantime I am so damn horny after she leaves town (she takes care of my needs quite well when we are together, but then I want that same level all the time).

So every skirt is looking good again.

 

[diablo]

Moved to Anything Else...