Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Setup date, next Sunday, but offered to text during the week

RickTheToad

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Matched up with this 26 year old pretty quickly. I would had set something up for this weekend, but the snowstorm blizzard screwed that up. I offered next Saturday, but she's doing a housewarming, so I suggested Sunday, and she agreed. After I wished her well and a good week, she said you too and we can certainly text during the week. I just replied no doubt with a smiley face. What do I text about? Normally, I wouldn't text during the week, but since she offered, I have a feeling she expects it. I think she'll bail if I don't.

Oh, couldn't d Friday as I already have plans. I cannot do during the week as she's like 45 mins away. I am surprised she agree to meetup as I already told her where I live.

Ideas?
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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flowtheory

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Matched up with this 26 year old pretty quickly. I would had set something up for this weekend, but the snowstorm blizzard screwed that up. I offered next Saturday, but she's doing a housewarming, so I suggested Sunday, and she agreed. After I wished her well and a good week, she said you too and we can certainly text during the week. I just replied no doubt with a smiley face. What do I text about? Normally, I wouldn't text during the week, but since she offered, I have a feeling she expects it. I think she'll bail if I don't.

Oh, couldn't d Friday as I already have plans. I cannot do during the week as she's like 45 mins away. I am surprised she agree to meetup as I already told her where I live.

Ideas?
Let her text you.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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flowtheory

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Thinking that's going to fail like the other lady in Manhattan. NY ladies seem a bit more conservative than LA ladies from what I gather.
Could be. Men on here do talk that NY women are a special breed.

Once the dates set, I just let her text. They usually send something to make sure everything’s still on track.

But what Glass said is fine too. It’s all fine really. Just don’t be needy or weird, look good and talk well, and I think dating is pretty simple.
 

RickTheToad

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Could be. Men on here do talk that NY women are a special breed.

Once the dates set, I just let her text. They usually send something to make sure everything’s still on track.

But what Glass said is fine too. It’s all fine really. Just don’t be needy or weird, look good and talk well, and I think dating is pretty simple.
Yes, ladies here are a handful.
 

GrowingPains

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Tried this a few hours ago, no response. Guess Sunday is now free.
Don't count yourself out mane, she could be busy. I understand where you're coming from though just give it some time.
 

Trump

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Matched up with this 26 year old pretty quickly. I would had set something up for this weekend, but the snowstorm blizzard screwed that up. I offered next Saturday, but she's doing a housewarming, so I suggested Sunday, and she agreed.
“Are you free Saturday?”
“I’m doing a housewarming for my pregnant friend. It’s her 1st child. She is so excited.”
‘Are you free Sunday?”
“OK.”

Come on man.


After I wished her well and a good week, she said you too and we can certainly text during the week. I just replied no doubt with a smiley face.
“Wish you well, have a good week.”
“You too. We can certainly text during week.”
“NO DOUBT!”

Come on man.


What do I text about? Normally, I wouldn't text during the week, but since she offered, I have a feeling she expects it. I think she'll bail if I don't.
What do you mean “if you don’t text her, she will bail?” Do you always do what 26 year females tell you? Don’t fall into her frame.

Text: “Hi xxx, wanted to confirm our get together Sunday?”

Come on man.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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backseatjuan

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45 mins is faaar. I got flaked 2 days ago and the date was 15 minutes by foot. I would never go that far just because it’s 50/50.

If you can do during week text her up. I mean Sunday, drive 45 mins, you got nothing else going on, in big bald letters all over and on loud speakers.

Any plans on doing a date in Russia? I mean it’s only an 18 hour flight, and if that thing with tits flakes we can always go sarging.
 

Mazer

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Tried this a few hours ago, no response. Guess Sunday is now free.
I’m not surprised. I find it difficult to schedule dates more than five days out without them flaking. Either way she probably had no intention of meeting up. Her asking you to text her in the middle of the week was to test you, to see if you would do what she said. Orbit status anyone? Plus, would have given you an excuse why she wouldnt be able to make it on Sunday. I would have called her in this instance versus texting.
Also, Recently I have been noticing when a woman tells you about something personal i.e a friends birthday, wedding, communion with details and go on and on about it before we even meet they almost always turn into AW’s or validation seekers who end up flaking. They wanted to tell me how great their miserable lives are.
 
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RickTheToad

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This would be the first time that I reached out. I did it as I saw a lot of posts from old time posters stating we cannot go a week w/o reaching out, so I did. As strange as it sounds, since two of the ladies are the same name, I reached out to the wrong one first. Prob. was, I already spoke to her yesterday, but she thought it was sweet that I reached out and is looking forward in seeing me on Saturday. She's only 25 minutes away. This one, is 35/40 and the hotter and younger of the two. I'm working overtime this week and next so it is kind of hard meeting during the week. Aside from that, the blizzard threw everything off for a few days. As for this one, I'm not reaching out again. I doubt I'd hear from her again. If I do, any suggestions on how to handle? What's funny is that when I messaged last Sunday she responded a minute or two later. This last one, no response at all. No watch, she'll message me on Sunday asking if we're still on.
 

Glassguy

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Tried this a few hours ago, no response. Guess Sunday is now free.
The ball is in her court.
Based on my experience its low interest or she would have reached out already. A woman has her phone on her 24/7.
If you hear back from her great, but if she does text you back, I would double the time that she took to respond to me before I texted her back. I am not always a fast responder anyways since I am typically busy.

The only shot you absolutely cannot make is the one that you dont take. I dont see any harm in throwing out a "Hey stranger/how is your day" text. It takes 10 seconds and they either bite or they dont. No big deal.
 

SoSuave666

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The ball is in her court.
Based on my experience its low interest or she would have reached out already. A woman has her phone on her 24/7.
If you hear back from her great, but if she does text you back, I would double the time that she took to respond to me before I texted her back. I am not always a fast responder anyways since I am typically busy.

The only shot you absolutely cannot make is the one that you dont take. I dont see any harm in throwing out a "Hey stranger/how is your day" text. It takes 10 seconds and they either bite or they dont. No big deal.
Correct. Absolutely no problem with sending a text a few days after she agrees to a date. There isn't much to lose anyway. If she flakes you are in the same position you were in a few days ago, nbd. Sounds like OP has at least one other girl to see.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Glassguy

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Correct. Absolutely no problem with sending a text a few days after she agrees to a date. There isn't much to lose anyway. If she flakes you are in the same position you were in a few days ago, nbd. Sounds like OP has at least one other girl to see.
Outcome indifference.

I hope that she responds back- but if she doesnt, thats ok too
I hope to smash this chick- but if it doesnt work out thats ok too because I have 2 other plates
This chick MIGHT be a LTR candidate as she has done nothing to show red flags and has lots of good characteristics- but there will be one around the next corner just as good or better IF SHE decides to not submit
 

SoSuave666

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Outcome indifference.

I hope that she responds back- but if she doesnt, thats ok too
I hope to smash this chick- but if it doesnt work out thats ok too because I have 2 other plates
This chick MIGHT be a LTR candidate as she has done nothing to show red flags and has lots of good characteristics- but there will be one around the next corner just as good or better IF SHE decides to not submit
For me, in the position of the OP, it's not even that. I am not even thinking about LTR or banging. Really the only "goal" is to get her in the same place as me at the same time I am there. When I meet her is when I decide whether or not she has qualities for LTR, assess red flags, think about ****ing.

If a girl I just met flakes on me she had low interest anyway and it's usually not worth my time to try and build her interest. There are too many women in this world to analyze why one girl in one situation decided to flake. OP has other chicks so he's at least got that going for him. However if you come on here and make a thread about a certain girl you aren't really in a mindset of indifference or abundance. My only question is: why? From what I can tell they only just met...
 

Glassguy

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If a girl I just met flakes on me she had low interest anyway and it's usually not worth my time to try and build her interest.
If a woman flakes on a date I do 2 possible things:

1.) I do nothing. I would NEVER reach out after getting flaked on.

2.) If she reaches back out, and I am still interested, she is a booty call only. I will invite her over on night that I am not doing anything and she can come chill. No dates. She has been demoted from LTR possibility to a total hookup plate due to HER actions.

I act accordingly based on how these women show me they should be treated.
 

RickTheToad

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Certainly an interesting situation. She was very chatty on Bumble and I texted her the next day and was instantaneous. What's weird is that she didn't even close me out on Bumble.

One lady asked to exchanged numbers before I can even ask her for her's, and I did yesterday. I was going to reach out over the weekend. Strangely enough, she reached out to me directly. I'll respond in a few.. After all, I now have Sunday free. Though, she wanted to meet up mid-week in her Bumble messages.
 
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