"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Serious advise needed about contacted ex

evan12

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So I have one of my ex gf (actually it was only 2 months but we was serious ) she was really a good girl, and vergin (yes she was religious ) . we broke up peacefully because she asked for many things that I am financially unable to commit to. but other than that we was good and respecting to each others.
I want to contact her back to see if things might changed because I really find her a good wife potential and I remember she wasnt sure from breakup but she had some pressure from her family , Something hold me back from doing that , is that my fear of rejection or what ? why I am seeing a big deal to just throw a message, the worst she will say no .
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Powersurgeon

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I'm by no means an experto Don Juan but it seems that you're hurrying into simething that is not advisable and that is "getting married" the second thing is the oneitis disease growing into you. Go out and meet more women. You say that the breakup was because financial matters and pressure from her family. Are you really into someone that wants you because of how much money you earn and her family pressures her about that?
Sorry for my english.
 

evan12

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I am ready for marriage, but this story is 2 years old , and no contact from that time , the only reason I want to contact her is good , I dont have oneits over her , it is just some thing logical that she make good wife. regarding to financial things this is the tradition and it comes as cost with any 'quality' girl you want it in our culture.
 

Powersurgeon

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I am ready for marriage, but this story is 2 years old , and no contact from that time , the only reason I want to contact her is good , I dont have oneits over her , it is just some thing logical that she make good wife. regarding to financial things this is the tradition and it comes as cost with any 'quality' girl you want it in our culture.
Then you should see if she's into the "tradition" as well, I mean a stay home mom while you are the provider.
 

evan12

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Then you should see if she's into the "tradition" as well, I mean a stay home mom while you are the provider.
I am not asking here if she is good or not , I just want to know why I am finding it so hard to contact here , is it because I fear of a second rejection , does that happens to every body when they want to initiate the contact with the ex
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Glumix

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I am not asking here if she is good or not , I just want to know why I am finding it so hard to contact here , is it because I fear of a second rejection , does that happens to every body when they want to initiate the contact with the ex
You fear of rejection.
You fear of discovering that she has just replaced you with another guy with whom she lost her virginity.
You fear to see your loss once again and to revive old aches.

If she is a good girl then contact her. But be sure you will handle those fears when they will face you.
 

Desdinova

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we broke up peacefully because she asked for many things that I am financially unable to commit to.
This whole "we broke up" is a bunch of 5hit. Somebody here initiated the breakup. Was it you? Was it her? You don't just approach each other one day, both having the desire to break up.

One thing I like to remember about ex-gfs is that every single one of them has a major red flag. That major red flag is the label of being an EX.
 

Alvafe

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I am ready for marriage, but this story is 2 years old , and no contact from that time , the only reason I want to contact her is good , I dont have oneits over her , it is just some thing logical that she make good wife. regarding to financial things this is the tradition and it comes as cost with any 'quality' girl you want it in our culture.
and here is the thing, no you are not ready for marriage, also undertand this she will not change, if she did not change for you before she will not do it now, also i'm pretty sure she is no a virgin, don't matter if she is religious, I find the most slut girls are religious, only diference is she hide well from her parents (or they are that stupid, with would explain the religious background).

now the reasons you don't contact her? maybe gut feeling if you do it would be a mistake?fear of she don't even remember who was you? maybe she is already married, if she is that good really possible.

the real question here I would ask is why you don't find another woman, better then her?
 

Sprayarc

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I think it's a bad idea. Especially if she was content with losing you in the first place. If she cared less than you about ending the relationship she has/ had more power.

Remember women avoid confrontation and hurting your feelings. She'd rather get you to end the relationship than doing it herself of possible.

It's never a good sign if she makes financial demands from you regardless of if she's an alleged "good girl" or not.

I think it's time for you to move on.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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