If your only way to really meet a chick is to put a note in her mailbox, is this ok to do...or will it come across as creepy. I met this neighbor chick who lives down the street and the conversation went really well but I didn't get a # because I was a puss. I don't have her # and probably won't see her again anytime soon. I'm just thinking about a note that says something like "enjoyed talking with you and would liek to get to know you better, etc." and then put my phone #. Also, she's an older chick if that factors in.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Sending Notes
- Thread starter labyrinth
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Daddy The Pimp
Master Don Juan
Bad Idea
wjh
Master Don Juan
Yes, bad idea - because you pussed out. Don't do the note thing. Next time you see her talk to her and build a little rapport (partly for yourself, sending a note is pretty desperate). Then ask her number.
Who cares if you don't see her for a while? Aren't you talking to other girls? If the answer to this is "No" then you need to be.
Who cares if you don't see her for a while? Aren't you talking to other girls? If the answer to this is "No" then you need to be.
Young Anikan
Don Juan
Well,if you know where she works at or where she goes to have fun you could create something.Just act like you ran into her,have a little convo,tell her you didnt get a chance to get her number and ask her what is it?Then tell her your heading to so an so and tell her you'll call her later.Definetly no notes in the mail box crap.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
labyrinth said:
Obviously, you already have decided to do the note thing...lol
Look man, don't do it...she may not think it's "creepy" but it's not the way to go. What makes you so sure you won't see her soon? She's your neighbor!!
Brandonc662
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 22, 2008
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Have you ever herd a girl talking about how she met her boyfriend story like "I never knew anything about him, we talked once nothing special, but one day I was checking my mail and.............."
Agree DO NOT DO THIS. You are 32 not a 7yo writing a note "do you like me check _yes or _no". No woman wants a boy. She wants a man. I think a full blown AFC would even be against this Idea. Talk to her face to face like a real human being would do.
Agree DO NOT DO THIS. You are 32 not a 7yo writing a note "do you like me check _yes or _no". No woman wants a boy. She wants a man. I think a full blown AFC would even be against this Idea. Talk to her face to face like a real human being would do.
I just figured someone of her age, as opposed to someone 18-25 or so, would react to it differently, and might even find it flattering. She doesn't get out much and it was a rare occasion that I saw her. I know that she is single so it would be good to do something before there is a possibility that her status could change, lol
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Brandonc662
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 22, 2008
- Messages
- 110
- Reaction score
- 9
Yeah I think this is funny also, He could put the note in between her Social security check and her AARP membership letter.yama600rr said:
It's beyond just physical appearance and just wanting to sleep with her...we just really clicked personality wise and had a great time talking. It was enough to leave me with the feeling that I wanted to get to know her better and talk to her more. Hell, we may just end up as friends for all I know, but I would really like to get to know her and spend time with her talking and getting to know more about who she is as a person. I'm not trying to hit on her in the same way I would a girl in the bar or someone I would want to take home and bang a time or two.
bukowski_merit
Master Don Juan
you seem a little strange, so i don't suppose you'd be against watching for her to exit her building and then "acting" like you ran into her? as much as i'd never do anything like that - it's leaps and bounds above the note in the mailbox idea.
here's a little thing to keep in mind: if she's this lonely lady you speak of - and still somehow attractive - she's most likely lonely and single by choice and not looking for a strange guy to sweep her off her feet.
here's a little thing to keep in mind: if she's this lonely lady you speak of - and still somehow attractive - she's most likely lonely and single by choice and not looking for a strange guy to sweep her off her feet.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.