"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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sell yourself in job interview?

picard

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How do you guys sell yourself in job interview?
although, I answered all the right technical questions, I would still screw up. I am well groom and dress in very nice custom made suit. I don't twidle my thumbs or scratch myself because those actions indicate nervousness. I read all the tips about job interviews; I was well prepared for the behavioral questions. I can't be perfect person to everybody. I have a problem with stuttering and hyperactivity. I try to control it by speaking slowly. It does help me in eliminating the problem during interview. My hyperactivity still act up occasionally in some interviews hence I lose my chance at the plume job. :mad:

I am just not good in selling like car saleman. Do you have different ideas in selling?
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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gmillar

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Well for one thing, if you practise typing properly, with good grammar and punctuation, that might be reflected in how you manage your job interview. Just a thought.
 

picard

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I apologize for grammatical error; English is my second language.
 

Shiftkey

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I'm great at interviews :) I've interviewed for about 8 jobs in my life and only got turned down once (but really I just did the interview because my friend made me - I didn't want the job). The funny thing about them is that in some ways it works EXACTLY like picking up a woman.

The best trick is to project positive ENERGY. You need to be HUNGRY for that job and make it clear to the person interviewing you that you'll do whatever it takes. When you speak, be passionate about your abilities and what you can do for that company.

Another trick I use is building rapport. Don't be afraid to talk fluff with your interviewer and ask semi-personal questions when it comes up in conversation. I even asked how old my female interviewer (26 ;p ) was because I related myself to her by mentioning people say I have a youthful appearance. When in doubt, be bold.

Always CLOSE the deal. At the end of your interview, if they haven't already said, ask when the second interview is. If you're on your second interview, ask when you can start.

Know the difference between confidence and ****iness. You should be sure of your abilities, but don't be arogent. Don't correct the interviewer, and know your place. Law #1 of the 48 Laws of Power: Never outshine the master (btw, read that book).
 

OfficeSpace

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I've read the 48 laws of power but never read the book... I might pick it up...

Anyways, yeah, just as Shiftkey said, project positive energy. I doubt anyone loves a deadbeat gloomy worker. be the upbeat happy lively person in the interview that looks eager to work and listen to what his boss has to say.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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picard

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If I ask her age, I am more likely to get kick out of the interview. My chances would be screwed royally.

what book are you guys talking about?
 

Doggystyle

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You need to build a good rapport with the interviewer. It really doesnt matter what you say, you've just got to not **** it up. I've been offered the job many times during the interview, "we've got a few more people to see but we are going to offer it to you if you interested" is the responses i've been getting recently at the end of interviews. Took ALOT of terrible interviews to get like this though. You've got to go into to the interview and remember that the interviewer is also nervous too and they are trying to sell the job to you as well. this should put you more at ease but practice will put you at most ease and let you communicate more freely. the last interview i had i looked at the interviewer and they where shaking with nerves. Dont ask questions either when they say, "have you got any questions?" instead of saying stuff like, "whats the salary?" say "i'd be interested to know what the salary is because....blah blah blah" or any other questions you may have reform them as statements. Talk about your self alot and really evaluate on it, never give short answers.
(its quite funny how this actually relates to my game!)
 

Shiftkey

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Dont ask questions either when they say, "have you got any questions?" instead of saying stuff like, "whats the salary?" say "i'd be interested to know what the salary is because....blah blah blah" or any other questions you may have reform them as statements. Talk about your self alot and really evaluate on it, never give short answers.
ACK! Bad advice! Never ask about salary - ALWAYS wait for them to bring it up. And when they do bring it up, dance around the question. I like to research salaries for the field I'm interviewing for before going into the interview. For example, the job I just got has an average starting salary of 27k + commission/benefits. My prepared answer was "Well I did some research on salary.com so I know the average salary is around 27k + commission/benefits, but my primary concern is working for XYZ company."

As for questions, ALWAYS ask a question. This is a test! It shows that you're interested in the job. I usually ask about advancement and promotions. Not only does this question show that you're interested in the job, but it demonstrates ambition and that you'd be a worthwhile investment for their company. Companies usually like to promote from within - it cuts costs and they know what they're getting. They want you to work for that company for a long time.

Focusing on yourself is a bad idea too. It tends to make the interviewer bored and makes their mind wander. Make the interview a conversation just like how you would talk to a woman you're interested in. Try to keep the conversation 35% you 65% them. Don't give short answers OR long answers - give concise, detailed, efficient answers. If you think an answer is too short, ask the interviewer if they'd like more detail on a specific subject. Again, try to keep the interview a dialog, not a monolog.
 

Doggystyle

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yeah it was a bad example of the salary, sorry, but it was fresh in my mind to use as an example of a question you would ask. i had a job offer today and declined it based on the salary, it was a better job and all but would of ment relocating to a much much more expensive area which would of taken me about 4 more years to get on the same amount of disposable income as i'm on now, so in that case the salary was an important issue, and it didnt devalue myself as i explained why before they asked.
I just used that as an example of reforming questions into statements with evaluations, but in general, just use this as something your actually interested in knowing.
 

Doggystyle

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Shiftkey said:
As for questions, ALWAYS ask a question. This is a test! It shows that you're interested in the job. I usually ask about advancement and promotions. Not only does this question show that you're interested in the job, but it demonstrates ambition and that you'd be a worthwhile investment for their company. Companies usually like to promote from within - it cuts costs and they know what they're getting. They want you to work for that company for a long time.
Yes always ask a question, but not as a question if you know what i mean.
e.g. do you just say, "what about promotions?"
instead say "i was wondering about the opportunities of promotion because I see my self as a dynamic individual willing to progress though out the company......blah blah blah...."
You see making a statement about your self and evaluating upon it seperates yourself from every one else that would normally just ask the origianal straight to the point question.

Shiftkey said:
Focusing on yourself is a bad idea too. It tends to make the interviewer bored and makes their mind wander. Make the interview a conversation just like how you would talk to a woman you're interested in. Try to keep the conversation 35% you 65% them. Don't give short answers OR long answers - give concise, detailed, efficient answers. If you think an answer is too short, ask the interviewer if they'd like more detail on a specific subject. Again, try to keep the interview a dialog, not a monolog.
No focus on yourself, your trying to sell your self and nothing else, the interviewer knows this, you know this and every other fly on the wall knows this. The conversation should be 80% you and 20% interviewer, the other way round (35%you and 65% the interviewer) then its going to be long detailed questions yeilding short answers from you. Doesn't look good, doesn't say much about yourself and doesn't seperate you from the other people.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Shiftkey

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Yes always ask a question, but not as a question if you know what i mean.
e.g. do you just say, "what about promotions?"
instead say "i was wondering about the opportunities of promotion because I see my self as a dynamic individual willing to progress though out the company......blah blah blah...."
You see making a statement about your self and evaluating upon it seperates yourself from every one else that would normally just ask the origianal straight to the point question.
You think interviewers can't smell BS? I think the question I asked in my last interview was "What can you tell me about the advancement process and how quickly can someone move up in the company if they work hard enough?"

No focus on yourself, your trying to sell your self and nothing else, the interviewer knows this, you know this and every other fly on the wall knows this. The conversation should be 80% you and 20% interviewer, the other way round (35%you and 65% the interviewer) then its going to be long detailed questions yeilding short answers from you. Doesn't look good, doesn't say much about yourself and doesn't seperate you from the other people.
You get them to talk by asking questions and having a conversation with the interviewer. If all you do is answer their questions with long winded answers that could be answered in half as much time, the interviewer is going to tune out. The idea behind 35/65 is identical to talking to women - people like to talk, especially about themselves. If you can turn the interview, which is normally an unpleasant process for both parties, into something they enjoy, you're garanteed to get hired.
 

picard

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there is trend now which company or recruiter ask for your salary range. Do you guys notice this trend ? or Am I the only person who see this trend. I have been ask about salary range many times.
 

Shiftkey

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picard said:
there is trend now which company or recruiter ask for your salary range. Do you guys notice this trend ? or Am I the only person who see this trend. I have been ask about salary range many times.
Just use my line. It's gold, trust me :)
 

bbestar

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Shiftkey said:
I'm great at interviews :) I've interviewed for about 8 jobs in my life and only got turned down once (but really I just did the interview because my friend made me - I didn't want the job). The funny thing about them is that in some ways it works EXACTLY like picking up a woman.

The best trick is to project positive ENERGY. You need to be HUNGRY for that job and make it clear to the person interviewing you that you'll do whatever it takes. When you speak, be passionate about your abilities and what you can do for that company.

Another trick I use is building rapport. Don't be afraid to talk fluff with your interviewer and ask semi-personal questions when it comes up in conversation. I even asked how old my female interviewer (26 ;p ) was because I related myself to her by mentioning people say I have a youthful appearance. When in doubt, be bold.

Always CLOSE the deal. At the end of your interview, if they haven't already said, ask when the second interview is. If you're on your second interview, ask when you can start.

Know the difference between confidence and ****iness. You should be sure of your abilities, but don't be arogent. Don't correct the interviewer, and know your place. Law #1 of the 48 Laws of Power: Never outshine the master (btw, read that book).
I have a question..

What if you were fired from your last job only being there for 2 months.
A few reason's being late 20 minutes twice the whole month and for dress code, instead of wearing black slacks, wore grey slacks
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Shiftkey

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bbestar said:
I have a question..

What if you were fired from your last job only being there for 2 months.
A few reason's being late 20 minutes twice the whole month and for dress code, instead of wearing black slacks, wore grey slacks
I'd say they were strict, but justified in their decision. What does this have to do with the topic?
 

picard

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I had been to job interview which the interviewer talks so fast; I could barely had chance to say anything. Could the company set up bogus job interview as a way to promote their company product? I saw the same tactic this interviewer used on previous candidate. He talked and talked to no end about how well the company was growing etc... I didn't have chance to tell him about my skills. the interview last about 5min. It was too fast. of course I knew that I didn't get the job.
 
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