Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Self-Pity thread.....

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SilverSonnet

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Wouldn't you like to know? ;)
Man, I'm never gonna fit in the way I want to...I try so hard not to be annoying, to be funny, to pull girls, try hard to be witty and funny. I try to impress friends, to show off myself to people. I make light fun of people and make people laugh. But people all tell me most of the people they know find me annoying, and one guy even told me that alot of his girl mates think I'm gay.

I'm totally disheartened. I don't even know whether self-improvement is worth it anymore. Is it?

Before you reply, I'm apoligising to Tom and to all of you, for this bullsh!t post and self-pity, but I need an out let, hell, even my MUM and SISTER find me annoying and not funny.
I don't have anyone actually close to me who I can tell proper secrets to, not a mate, I can outlet feelings and sh!t.
I was in such a good mood, then I return to reality, and realise what a fvcking loser I really I am.

From ben:down:
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Stéphane

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SilverSonet **** you you ****ing troll. Some of us really tried everything, and we aren't doing anything wrong, women are just ****ed up. **** you.
 

Bible_Belt

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I try so hard

Maybe that is what is annoying about you. Stop trying so hard and worrying about what people think. You're even apologizing in advance to sosuave. Who cares what these people think? Who cares what anybody thinks about you? The answer is - you do, and obviously too much.

Whether everyone hates you or loves you - you're still the same person. You are the only one who defines you.
 

Smack

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SilverSonnet said:
Man, I'm never gonna fit in the way I want to...I try so hard not to be annoying, to be funny, to pull girls, try hard to be witty and funny. I try to impress friends, to show off myself to people. I make light fun of people and make people laugh. But people all tell me most of the people they know find me annoying, and one guy even told me that alot of his girl mates think I'm gay.

I'm totally disheartened. I don't even know whether self-improvement is worth it anymore. Is it?

Before you reply, I'm apoligising to Tom and to all of you, for this bullsh!t post and self-pity, but I need an out let, hell, even my MUM and SISTER find me annoying and not funny.
I don't have anyone actually close to me who I can tell proper secrets to, not a mate, I can outlet feelings and sh!t.
I was in such a good mood, then I return to reality, and realise what a fvcking loser I really I am.

From ben:down:
Bolded everything that you're doing wrong. I agree with Bible_Belt.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Guybrush

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Hey Ben,

You are so young and you have a whole life in front of you. Don't set your expectations too high!

I think Latinoman was right about the fact that SoSuave is not really good for the youth.

People should come here after going through some relationships (even as an AFC) in life...

My suggestion is : Forget about being an Alpha Male at the age of 15. You can't be an A-male at that age! Some things in life will get better in time. Just go around, be a nice guy for a while. Be nice to your FAMILY, your sister. Do favors for them.

Advising people to be ****Y is very dangerous. They use it in all aspects of their lives... This is not good.

You will have plenty of time with girls but that is NOT THE PURPOSE OF LIFE!

The purpose of life is to MAXIMIZE the potential of your faculties and talents to get what YOU want from life.

Focus on your school - forget about doing workouts, approaches, reading posts, posting here...

You are just TOO YOUNG.

We don't need women to live. But if you want to be an alpha male in the future, you definitely need a good background. It is most naturally obtained with a good education, but of course it can be achieved by other means as well.

You are saying that you are making "light" fun of people. You are probably overestimating the ****y-funny advice being advertised here.

Don't expect everything just yet. All the beautiful things in life ARE EARNED.

Work hard, and be patient.
 

collalife

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you idiot. lol. dont try to impress them. people can see when your trying to impress them and immediately slot you below them. I suggest you do affirmations like "i am ****y and funny" and i "i am witty". this way you come off as a naturally witty guy. your just going through the crying afc stage wake the F%ck up. self-improve yourself by not caring what people think and maybe deepen your voice since people think your gay. find a lair, at bristol lair.com and attend the meetings and ask for help. YOu can either b%tch and moan and stay the same or go out there and change your life and become a mpua who sleeps with supermodels.

AS you think, you shall become. DONT TRY TO IMPRESS PEOPLE NUMBSKULL.
 

Genghis_Khan

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Dude you should totally give up on self improvement!!!

If you're doing it to ONLY impress other people, then what's the point? RIGHT???

Self-improvement is about you changing yourself to become a better man. It's you trying to impress YOURSELF. It's about working and changing yourself, so that YOU CAN LIKE YOURSELF.

Think about the things you do and say to other people, and view it from the other person's perspective. You become annoying when you're trying too hard to be funny, to be liked, and to impress others. Even if you say the funniest jokes, overdueing it will become annoying.

SERIOUSLY, don't give up on your self-improvement. You already know that you shouldn't just do things to try to impress others. I suggest you should find all the Senor Fingers posts and read them, if you already haven't. Read the "Authentic Confidence" post.

Giving Up is not in the DJ dictionary - Keep your head high!!!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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DJVladdy

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Stephane you're a little bytch, you've made that clear already.

Silver Sonnet, get checked for aspergers please. Don't get me wrong, Im not saying it to be mean, im saying it to be kind.
 

The Bat

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Half of the people posting don't realize that the OP is still a kid (he's 14, isn't he?). It's very normal for him to go through these phases, swings, and bouts of emotions and look for some sort of acceptance for his emotional state. He comes here to find that acceptance. So, grow up, folks. Stop belittling and labeling this child.

To the OP, if you are merely looking for acceptance or an outlet of your emotions, then just PM some members whom you trust. Not only will you attract harsh criticism by making new threads like these frequently, you will NOT accomplish what you set out to do initially: Support. Keep this in mind for next time. :up:
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Warrior74

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stop trying to be funny. stop trying to impress. take a few seconds before you speak and think. ask a question sometimes before you make a statement. if you are constantly going up and down in your mood, what does that tell you?

you should try an exercise for a week. don't speak unless spoken to for five days. Listen to everything people say. Look and observe them. Watch how they react to you. Can your ego let you do that?

Are you the sort of person who has to be right? Are you crude? Do you "tell it like it is"? Just some thoughts.

ah...he's 14...I don't know how I feel about someone this young on this site.
 

BMX

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Don't give a 5hit about these people and what you can prove to them. I kept up w/everything that I enjoyed: working out, mma, cycling, punk rock, movies and other stuff whilst improving myself.

I was on the wrestling team and never listened to my coaches when they stressed the importance of "we" FVCK that! It was an individual sport and that's how I approached it everyday. Now if ur talkin' "team", the HS football team sucked balls w/their 1-9 record and fatty physiques. Yes, ppl b!tched about me and never to my face, if they ever had the nerve to, I would've fvcked their 5hit up. They nicknamed me "crazy" but did I give a 5hit? Neither should you in your environment.
 

Stéphane

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DJVladdy said:
Stephane you're a little bytch, you've made that clear already.

Silver Sonnet, get checked for aspergers please. Don't get me wrong, Im not saying it to be mean, im saying it to be kind.
Are you really this stupid, look at the reply he posted in my thread.

Ugh. Self pity. Get over yourself. Find out where your going wrong and tweak it.
Then one hour later he makes this thread.
 

DJVladdy

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Reason why I said that, the name silver sonnet??
Dude, your NOT fifTY, you're fifTEEN.
Even your name is weird, like what the hell, is he trying to be sophisticated, or is he really this sketchy. You're waaay to intellectually advanced for your age, or at least trying to be.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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