"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Self Motivation

Ever onward

Master Don Juan
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Cross the Line. You know exactly what line I mean.

The line that seperates you from the "you" that you want to be.

On this side of the line is you and all your percieved limitations with all the things you don't like about yourself. On the other side of the line is all the people you wish you were like. All the people who are better looking than you or who have more money than you do. The guys who are younger or who are better with women. The ones who are more popular or more social than you, or all the guys that are in better shape than you, they're all over there and you just can't get there because you are you and they are they.

You keep searching for something outside of yourself to help you to cross the line. You get on message boards and you search for hours looking for collective knowledge on how to become more social or how to get those hot women that are just beyond your reach. Hell, you even gave up masturbation for a week or two but that didn't work. You've ordered seduction material from David Deangelo and Mystery and Juggler. Yet you're still on this side of the line.

You try the DJ bootcamp and hope that internet guys can cheer you on as you push yourself past your known social limitations and you get a really hot girlfriend. Maybe it works for awhile but inside you're still the same; and you snap back to your side of the line when the girl you met dumps you for being too needy. You thought you could cross the line just because you landed a sexy girlfriend, didn't you? You were wrong.

Maybe you can cross the line next week when you have more time, you know after you finish your writing assignment. Or maybe next week you can buy some cool clothes or get a cool haircut and at last you'll be the "you" that you've always imagined you could be. Yeah right, it won't help you be the "you" that you want to be. You have to change from the inside first.

Maybe tomorrow you can start your diet or start working out. Tomorrow is another day right? I mean you can't change yourself today but tomorrow will be different right? Well guess what, tomorrow will eventually turn into "today" and you will still have to face "today".

Change yourself today.

No more procrastination. No more comparing yourself to others. You want to know something? Once you cross the line, you will still look exactly the same way as you do right now and there won't be any visible change. Only you will know that a change has taken place inside. Only you will know that you're not procrastinating. Only you will know that you're not wasting your life wishing you could "be" a certain way but instead you are "being" who you want to be. It will only be when you get further past the line that things will look or seem different. As you just cross over there is no noticable ouside change.

Soon you will be in better shape or you will be more social or more confident. But right now you only feel different about your life. Right now you know that you are being proactive in your life instead of reactive. Look in the mirror; you're still the same. Look down; you've crossed the line. You don't have to compare yourself to anyone else now; you're on the same side of the line as they are. They may be a little further along than you but who cares, you've crossed your self-imposed barrier that was lined with excuses.

Now stop worrying so much. Relax. Feel the inner peace. Enjoy your life. You are being the "You" that you've always wanted to be. Just give it time to take effect. You're on your way now, no looking back.

YOU ARE ALREADY ALL THAT YOU WILL EVER NEED TO BE
 
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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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killbill

Senior Don Juan
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damn dude I like what you said, its true most of us just need to relax and stuff. I like that alot. thanks.
 

Ever onward

Master Don Juan
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Hey your welcome.

I actually wrote this for myself and was trying to root out every excuse I have. If it helps anyone else, that's cool :D
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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