Selective Coldness

[hb]

I've seen people act in a cold manner & the effects it has are remarkable. I've also come to notice that I don't have it in me to be selectively cold & it effects my game. Some one who knows when to laugh & when to frown is thought to be smarter or better than some one who laughs at everything thrown at him.

With that... Do you guys know what I'm talking about & how 1 may improve on it.

Playing hard to get can be played in many ways but I feel at times that if I play these hard to get games instead of being a charming chum, I risk losing the person when I'd rather keep people around!!

 

[Proselytiser]

I am naturally cold towards everyone, so I can't really help you. It's crazy though - the amount of outright rude and disrespectful **** that people let you get away with (even at work) after they have warmed up to you. "It's just his sense of humour" hahaha

 

[Die Hard]

I risk losing the person when I'd rather keep people around!!

Your inner game needs improvement, you need to work on that attitude you describe above.

A DJ is never afraid to walk away and shows it! He's got nothing to lose and shows it! This attitude gives you power and raises your attraction. Your attitude, as described above, takes power away from you and lowers your attraction.

She has to be afraid of losing you, not the other way around!

 

[hb]

O definitely bro but I'm not just referring to woman I'm referring to guys & friends in general I don't like the thought of losing them, is this also weakness?

 

[Die Hard]

If that attitude really becomes a part of your personality (which is kinda neccesary if you wanna become a DJ), it will automatically influence your behavior towards other people (besides girls) as well.

 

[hb]

So attitude over everything & every other thing?

How do you numb your emotions!!!

 

[Tiguere]

There is an old quote that says " feeling are not suppose to be logical, dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions"

How true is this quote?
Is this quote promoting AFCism?

Thoughts and feedbacks.

 

[zekko]

I am naturally cold towards everyone, so I can't really help you. It's crazy though - the amount of outright rude and disrespectful **** that people let you get away with (even at work) after they have warmed up to you. "It's just his sense of humour" hahaha

I'm with you, I can be cold all day long, it comes naturally to me. What I have to work on is generating warmth and connections. It's too easy for me to lay back and be cold, because I don't care. That's why each person needs different sorts of tweaks to his personality to be effective.

I also agree with how much you can get away with when people know you. This woman told me the other day "You're so hateable you're lovable".

 

[hb]

Tig, I've actually been applying your principal the past couple of days & its been working tremendously.

 

[PuffyMac]

acting vs. feeling

You don't have to FEEL cold, you just have to ACT it (somewhat) if you want to have more success. That's the way I prefer to look at it from time to time. Make it a challenge to yourself, to see how well you can act.

my .02

 

[maqnetik]

its not a matter of coldness, its being about business and not clowning it up for these women who cant make up their minds