"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Seinfeld

zekko

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I've been watching reruns of Seinfeld lately. I remember thinking back in the early days of PUA gurus that Seinfeld displayed a lot of qualities from the pickup community. Maybe because it's set in New York, and shows a lot of big city dating behaviors.

The characters on the show fall into dates very casually - seems like they meet someone on the street and quickly and casually set up a date to meet. They're mostly serial monogamists - they date one person at a time, then move quickly to the next (that part doesn't fit the PUA "spin your plates" model). But they only rarely get emotionally involved, and usually break up over some small annoying habit the other person exhibits.

Jerry is the most obvious example of this. But even George, who is considered undesirable, runs into his share of dates, and sometimes even garners some deep interest (like when he played the "bad boy", and when he tried to do the "opposite" of his normal instincts). Kramer has no job but also seems to never be lacking in potential dates. Elaine basically acts like one of the guys, including the way she dates.

Anyone else think Seinfeld shows some good dating behaviors? They approach very casually and comfortably, no pressure and no sweat. Doesn't this reflect big city behavior to some extent (I live in a smaller town and we're more likely to pair up as couples)?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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BaronOfHair

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Anyone else think Seinfeld shows some good dating behaviors?
Yeah, and I also think Donald Rumsfeld was one of the most honorable men in 20th/21st century US government, and that Zelda Rubinstein was a sizzling hot piece of ass
 

Ricky

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There was a period of time when Friends and Seinfeld were on back to back. I greatly preferred Seinfeld to Friends but alot of the women back then were more into Friends

i think in Friends the characters were more good looking traditionally but the show wasn’t as funny or intellectual as Seinfeld.

Back to the question at hand. Jerry shows humour and calm almost co ck y confidence and so does Kramer on the show. George kinda of shows that he can pull women too so it is a good show in that sense.

i am not sure any of the characters have what you would want to emulate

i always think of the best archetype as Harrison Ford and his sarcasm as Indiana Jones or Han solo, or James Bond (depending on the actor)
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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zekko

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awesome show I take it you like curb your enthusiasm as well?
I think it's better than Seinfeld, really. I see the similarity between Seinfeld and Friends, but for whatever reason I could never get into Friends. But IMO the best sitcom of all time is The **** Van Dyke Show.


i always think of the best archetype as Harrison Ford and his sarcasm as Indiana Jones or Han solo, or James Bond (depending on the actor)
I think the casual way the Seinfeld characters approach is a perfect model. It never comes across as planned, just chatting up some strangers, and if there's some attraction, setting up a date. Oddly though, you don't see them dealing much with rejection. I never saw much you could use from James Bond, he's so stoic. He doesn't really do anything, he's just there and the girls come to him. Might work for a Chad.
 

Ricky

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I think it's better than Seinfeld, really. I see the similarity between Seinfeld and Friends, but for whatever reason I could never get into Friends. But IMO the best sitcom of all time is The **** Van Dyke Show.



I think the casual way the Seinfeld characters approach is a perfect model. It never comes across as planned, just chatting up some strangers, and if there's some attraction, setting up a date. Oddly though, you don't see them dealing much with rejection. I never saw much you could use from James Bond, he's so stoic. He doesn't really do anything, he's just there and the girls come to him. Might work for a Chad.
What about the sarcasm of indiana jones or han solo. I always thought he trended co c k y funny
 

GoodMan32

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Seinfeld (even though it's only a show, I'd call it realistic fiction) shows how much different the game was in the 90s.

There were no swipe apps.
 

zekko

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What about the sarcasm of indiana jones or han solo. I always thought he trended co c k y funny
Oh yeah, those Harrison Ford characters are gold.

Seinfeld (even though it's only a show, I'd call it realistic fiction) shows how much different the game was in the 90s.

There were no swipe apps.
Good point, I hadn't even considered that. The '90s wasn't that long ago (at least from my perspective), it makes you realize the cellphones and social media hasn't been around as long as it seems.
 

GoodMan32

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Oh yeah, those Harrison Ford characters are gold.


Good point, I hadn't even considered that. The '90s wasn't that long ago (at least from my perspective), it makes you realize the cellphones and social media hasn't been around as long as it seems.
Yeah. I'm below 35, yet I have memories of the 90s (hell, I developed my first crush in the 90s...either 97 or 98). Puts into perspective how relatively recent the 90s were.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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