Secret Lover of Engaged Japanese Girl

[Number_One]

I met a cute girl whilst on holiday in Japan and asked her out. We dated for 4 weeks including holding hands everywhere, snogging and groping. Then she dropeed a bombshell, she is engaged and it has to be called off. I immediately emailed her back confessing my love, letting her know I am serious. This was effective, her interest level spiked and she requested to meet up 2 more times before I left Japan, both times we had sex.

For 6 weeks we kept in contact by email and messenger, deep feelings of love were expressed by both sides and we decided to meet up again. She even made an international telephone call to me because she wanted to hear my voice.

We met up on a tropical island for a heavenly week long holiday together, we had loads of fun and progressed our relationship, including sex 9 times.

It is now 2 weeks later and we are once again keeping in contact via messenger, webcam and telephone. She often expresses that she is always thinking about me and loves me very much. We have now made a plan for her to visit my home town in July, I am sure that this will be very fun. However, it will be our last chance because she is due to get married soon after that.

As for the future, I have asked if she will leave him and come to live with me. She says that idea is actually really appealing to her, BUT (surprise, surprise) she needs more 'time to think' about it.

I have made my intentions very, very clear to her already, not sure what else there is to do about it really, do you guys have any experience with this?

 

[Roy]

If she can do it to him, then she can do it to you !

 

[playerone]

B*tches they come they go..

 

[slaog]

Be a man! Are you going to let a little Japanese girl walk all over you like she walks all over the guy she is engaged to? She doesn't respect that guy and she probably doesn't respect you either. Stand up and do the right thing. Demand her to make a decision and don't give her any time.


Making the hard decisions are things that DJ's do and AFC's avoid.

 

[3countriesPlan]

You should be playing her not falling into her web of hot jap azz and lies.. you won't ever have a decent relationship with her but I'm sure you can get her to meet up for some barebacking a few times a year. Just keep it at that.

 

[BudBundi]

9 times in seven days on a tropical island? That's a little sparse for a girl that's into you.

Who paid for the tickets?

 

[Number_One]

Some very valid points there

Being a man; Yeah, I've already offered her the chance to move in with me and have a serious relationship with me. So yeah, I dont think there is any real need to repeat this to her or start begging for her to leave him.

Playing her Any tips for this?

Island She paid for her own tickets and half of everything, she is quite stubborn that she should pay her share, which is fine by me. She is also using up all her work holiday days by visiting me and generally putting lots of effort towards it.

 

[DJDamage]

Being a man; Yeah, I've already offered her the chance to move in with me and have a serious relationship with me. So yeah, I dont think there is any real need to repeat this to her or start begging for her to leave him.

You aren't being a man, you are being a chump with oneitis.

You knew a girl on holiday for 6 weeks who secretly cheated on her man and in your eyes she is a great candidate for LTR and moving in with her?! WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE!!

Playing her Any tips for this?

You already played her but now you are potentially going to be putting yourself in a position where she is going to play you. Be happy that you went on vacation, fvcked an engaged girl for 6 weeks in secret and now the two of you can go back to your normal lives (you can go and fvck available women and she can go marry and manipulate her future husband).

Its done and over with, so move on!

 

[WhtRbt]

You're little japanese sweetheart is playing two guys, and you're one of them.

 

[alphaace]

How positive are you that she is engaged? As other people said before, she just might be playing 2 guys and you are one of them.

 

[Number_One]

oh, so many haters

well, I feel pretty good for screwing a hot girl many times, actually

and...i plan to explore any possibilities that may arise, in a cool way of course

stop hatin' (<--p.s. that is me pretending to be from 'the hood', i am not)
i wanna hear from guys who have experience with this, what they did, etc

 

[slaog]

oh, so many haters

well, I feel pretty good for screwing a hot girl many times, actually

and...i plan to explore any possibilities that may arise, in a cool way of course

stop hatin' (<--p.s. that is me pretending to be from 'the hood', i am not)
i wanna hear from guys who have experience with this, what they did, etc

It happened me last year. Before I met my current GF I was in a similar situation. I knew starting off that the girl had a BF but started seeing her and then started to develop oneitis. Eventually from reading advice on here I decided the only thing to do was to give her an ultimatum. She choose to stay with her BF (me getting more and more AFC didn't help) and although it hurt for a month I can look back and see that it was 100% the correct decision.


Don't get emotionally involved with women who are only good for a bit of fun.

 

[Number_One]

So if I give her an ultimatum she'll freak out under pressure and stop the affair?

Man, I'd rather keep hitting that sweet lil' ass of hers for as long as I can,

(but thanks for the warning)

 

[trajhenkhet02]

I would just keep it at visits if you can. It sounds like a good situation, I'm envious. If she see's you in a different light than the guy she is stringing along and you present yourself as more of a "domestic partner" you may begin to see her interest level plummet. Plus you have insight into how she "rolls". A man's vanity is easily played on if you don't see the whole situation (I must be doing something right if this chick is with me and not doing things with the dude she is engaged to). In reality all we know for sure is that she is cheating on her significant other. Unless you've seen her family or close friends at some point or have been invited to do so.

 

[Number_One]

hmm, her interest level seems to have dropped off quite suddenly.

Its such a ***** when that happens. I mean, one moment your both saying the normal things that lovers say to each other.....then she stops and it takes a couple of days to realise, in which time I was still saying goofy **** with no proper relay from her.

and so suddenly gone from suave to needy (oneitis territory). God damn. Well, at least I recoginsed it and can do something to fix it.
Thank you SoSuave !

 

[Number_One]

If she see's you in a different light than the guy she is stringing along and you present yourself as more of a "domestic partner" you may begin to see her interest level plummet.

yeah, I think that comment is perfect for my situation, I offered a more serious relationship too much I think, and then the interest level seems to have faded quite badly. Sometimes less is more when it comes women.