"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Second date issue

dbx

Don Juan
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So I'm trying to arrange a second date with a girl I went out with on Wednesday. She say's she's a little busy this weekend, but says "it'd be nice to see me" and can meet between 1 and 4/5 on Sunday for "coffee or something".

I don't know whether it's best to meet then or try arrange another night date later in the week when she's not so busy.

There's a football game on that I want to watch on Sunday that starts at 4 and there is a game she may want to watch at about 1. Should I offer to watch the game with her at the pub? Offer lunch? Or arrange for another time?

Any suggestions?

Thanks :)
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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bigneil

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It sounds wishy washy. If the first date went well she should text to thank you afterward, not be really busy. And if she's planning dates for Sunday afternoon, forget it. Go MIA until she asks you out via text.
 

dbx

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I actually knew she had some plans this weekend before asking her out, so she didn't suddenly make it up. I'm just wondering whether a sunday afternoon date with a definite end time is a good idea...
 

stickman21

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In general I think it's a bad idea to try to make plans with a woman if you know she is busy that weekend... It puts you in a position for her to turn you down.

For example, I was trying to setup a date a week ago for a Friday night and she let me know that she would be traveling for work that Saturday but said she might be able to meet up Friday night if she got all of her errands done. I declined and instead suggested that we meetup when she got back from her trip, which we did.

I would suggest that you take control of the situation and suggest another time to get together. Something along the lines of "hey, I would defn be up for getting together Sunday if I didn't have plans with my friends to grab some drinks and watch the game, let's get together next Thursday night"
 
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