scenario with girl

[Miles Davis]

A girl I was seeing for about 4 months recently called it off with me, apparantly at the time for no reason, but later found out it was to go back to her ex-boyfriend, after she had broken up with him in the first place. I suppose I was conveniently the "rebound guy." I'll have to admit that I did develop a bit of a one-itis for this girl, and the fact that she went back to her ex gives me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach at times. Funny thing is, I didn't even go out with her long enough to call her my girlfriend, and the chemistry between us wasn't even that spectacular.

During the time we were seeing each other, she connected me with her older brother, who is a musician. Since then, her brother and I have been working together and have began a music group, and have clicked real well . It's been rather tough to move on from this experience, especially since she did me a huge favor by helping me with my music, the most important thing to me. On top of seeing her through her brother, she is in two of my classes. I go in cycles of being bitter towards her, to being okay with her. I am trying to lose the bitterness towards her, while still being cool and detached. It's much easier said than done though.

Any suggestions?

 

[Trapspringer]

Don't blame yourself or any thing. It is hard to compete with ex's since they have an established past and feelings that were worked up for who knows how long before you meet the person you like.

You can be a really cool, great person but their heart just belongs to another and it is hard to take it away, hence one of the reason why being rebound sucks.


Your situation will be tough since an excellent way to get over someone is to stay away as much as possible from people or things that remind you of them and to stay away from them.

You are just going to have to tough this one out and take all of the crappy feelings that comes with it. Hopefully, that music will rake in enough chics in the long run to help you through it.

If the brothers brings her up often, tell her brother in a cool way that you rather not speak about her and let him know that there are no hard feelings against him or any thing. Hearing about her hanging out with the BF and other related news will prolong the S#itty feeling period.

 

[Miles Davis]

bump, anyone else

 

[squirrels]

Your relationship with her brother is music at this point. It doesn't matter HOW you met up. As long as the music's good, I wouldn't even worry about it.

As far as her...hey, it's her loss.

Seriously, it is...you've got better things to do than deplete your time and emotional energy worrying about what an ingrate like that is doing. Just remain cordial toward her, don't get p!ssed...dont' feel anything. Just don't care.

It may not come right away. Just try to keep your thinking in check.

 

[diablo]

I wish that there was some sound advice that you would be able to read, and immediately upon reading it, be "over her", or whatever it is that you wish. Unfortunately for all of us, life doesn't work like that. There's no sure fire cure for the pain people experience when they have things suddenly broken off with a person that they care about - whether that's your girlfriend or not. It's easy to sit here and say "give it time, it will go away", because it will. What's not easy is actually giving it time to go away, especially when she is in such close proximity to you via your classes and the band you and her brother are putting together. It's because of this pain that many of us on this board are set against 'one-itis'. The amount of pain you recieve when you and a girl end it is directly proportional to the amount of emotions you invest in her. (Wow, someone might quote that. Probably not. ) It'd be a good lesson to remember in the past - not that I'm not saying to not have strong feelings for any other girls, but in the future, be a tad bit more careful and stingy when giving out your heart. Sorry to hear about the bad luck, I hope this has helped somewhat.