Scared of sex

[EvenYouBrutus?]

Done a bit of growing lately. Started to be me and make my needs a priority. But now I want to move forward a bit.

Basicaly im a 27 your old thats **** scared of sex. Im not a virgin but the last time i attempted to have sex it really messed up my head. Basically I was really really stonned and got really really nervous. Don't know if any of you have got so stonned its sort of caused a panic attack. But thats what happed when I trying to have sex with this girl a few years ago.Turns out I could not get a boner and felt sick with anxity it was the worst experiance of my life and not a good confidence booster! The weed was not the cause of my anxity but amplified it by like 100%. The whole experiance has put me off sex and iv avoided it like the plauge since. Got this whole idea in my head it will NOW happen agnain and again and i don't want to go through it again.

Pretty messed up. Anyways thats the reason im here....

Basically I don't want a girlfreind or anykind of a relationship at the moment I just want to get this irrational part of my life handled. I want to explore my sexuallity sleep with random girls date differente women. Just live the the life of a playboy for a few years.


What iv done so far. (manly external things)

Read no more Mr nice Guy (not really participated tho) But iv learned a lot none the less
Cut down drasitically on weed. Im not a huge stonner anymore
Cleaned my house got it in some sort of running order (no longer living in a ****hole)
Started eating well and shopping for good food.
Started to go to the gym again
Started to be a lot more open with people

Anyways from here what would you guys do if you were in my situation.

Personally Im thinking of hitting the gym hard when Im ripped i feel so much more confident
got a book "feel the fear" that im going to read through
Sign up to a dating site POF.com

Basically I want to get some balls. Message a few mediocre women i don't really care about. Go on a few pointless dates mabye have some bad sex. All just to get the balls rolling just to start getting my confidence back when im around women.

 

[Eureka]

Next time the clothes start coming off, immediately go down on her. It will give you some time to relax and let the adrenaline rush pass, plus making her come will make you feel powerful and most likely get you turned on with no problem.

If you're still not ready to go at that point don't make a big deal out of it - it happens to everybody for one reason or another once in a while.

 

[EvenYouBrutus?]

Yeah I did that. Went down on her made her *** then dry humped her with my boxers on all panic attacked up made her *** again lol. Still did not releave my anxity and the fight or flight thing was going on the whole time. To be honest I dont really care how it was for her I felt horrible. I don't want it ever to happen again. Which is sort of my problem thinking that in my head it will.

Suppose the key is not giving a ****. I just want to sort of share whats really messed me up with people in order to get over it and not be so ashamed. like the other night my freinds were over talking about how many and what girls they were sleeping with at the moment. And i was just sitting there saying nothing feeling less of a man.

You think this internet dating site is the "next step" I know my freinds use it with a lot of success or should i focus on myself a bit more and avoid my biggest fears a bit longer?

 

[macagent]

weed can increase your anxiety level, reduce your blood pressure, and decrease your sexual desire. Which all can lead to no boner land. Sounds like it is not for you, or you smoked way too much in an already anxious situation.

If you are a puffer and don't want this to happen again, I would also add this to your training routine:
Smoke two joints in the morning, smoke two joints at night, smoke two more in the afternoon, and everything be all right.

 

[EvenYouBrutus?]

If i did that all id do is play xbox and jack off all day.