Sartre and the art of being yourself

[Mephisto]

So everybody through out my entire life has told me to be myself, but today I came across an interesting theory from existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre. It goes like this: Because we are aware of ourselves, we can never be completely ourselves, and instead we only play at ebing ourselves.

So my question is, everytime you are on a date and have a new personality for that date, are you still technically being yourself?

just a thought

 

[Ser_i]

good question.. when are you being yourself?

I dunno

Melissa thinks me being myself is trying to get into the pants of every girl I meet, the true player

Marcella thinks I'm the sensative very honoust, very carying guy with an eye for detail, the romantic guy

Marieke thinks I'm the guy who has commitment fear and am afraid of getting emotionaly bonded. that's why I act so chaotic in her eyes.

Mieneke thinks I'm a true Don Juan cause .. well she sais, I got that ****y attitude, can be rude at times but I do show sincereness on the moments it is needed (yes I told her what a Don Juan is about)

so I think I'm allways being myself as long as I don't doubt what I'm doing..

bah I hate the question! UNFAIR!!

 

[Halo]

Sartre's "Humanism of Existentialism" is one of the most influential things I have read. Some call existentialism bleak, but Sartre points out that it is the contrary. Your "destiny" depends on you and you alone, and adopting that attitude right there is the mark of men. Before, I was one of those who would always convince myself of the things I was incapable of doing, without making a real effort at all. "I can't be smooth with women", etc, ad infinitum. Sartre changed my entire outlook about that. Even though I have much work left to do, I know that I am now on the road of progress rather than left spinning my wheels on the road of stagnation.

 

[icepick]

Originally posted by Mephisto
So everybody through out my entire life has told me to be myself, but today I came across an interesting theory from existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre. It goes like this: Because we are aware of ourselves, we can never be completely ourselves, and instead we only play at ebing ourselves.

So my question is, everytime you are on a date and have a new personality for that date, are you still technically being yourself?

just a thought

I think being "yourself" would consist of doing what YOU want to do.

Being "someone else" would consist of doing what you THINK SHE wants you to do.

And we all know that women like men/monads/alpha-males/decicive guys/dominant guys/whatever you wanna call em.

I don't think that people who are "losers" are REALLY being themselves. They do what they do for FEAR of everybody else.

 

[Don Ronny]

Re: Re: Sartre and the art of being yourself

Originally posted by icepick
I think being "yourself" would consist of doing what YOU want to do.

Being "someone else" would consist of doing what you THINK SHE wants you to do.

I don't think that people who are "losers" are REALLY being themselves. They do what they do for FEAR of everybody else.

Wow. So concise and so true.

I dont think anyone has ever put it better than you, ice. Nice!

 

[Mephisto]

But, as long as its "You think she wants..." that is your own perceptions on things. Even if you change because she told you too, you would still be yourself, but it becomes a moral question. (Is it right to change because she told me to? The answer is no.)

 

[Player_Supreme]

If being yourself was so great then why are you here? It's being you that got you no puss*y. You gotta learn to improve on who you are.

Being the person you are bought you to this site cause nobody was buying you as a product. So you gotta change the ingredients and the packaging. Unfortunately it's not the real you until it absorbes in but it will eventually become the real you.

An example...last year when I went out I wore jeans and sean johns or rocca wear. I went for the rough guy look. I wanted to elevate myself so I began to wear slacks and dress shirts and shoes...

Now I hate wearing jeans and jean coats to a night club. The person who I was a year ago changed. Last year I would feel like a goober dressing as I do now, but now I feel like a champion.

 

[sisyphus]

Good post!

But how do we "get in the zone" so to speak i.e. when were not so caught up in self-consciousness of ourselves. I have a problem with being too reflective at times, but its hard to change because if I keep telling my self "stop being so reflective," I'm doing the very thing I'm intending not too.

 

[So pimp its scary]

You are always being yourself... it's just that, for example, when you are shy, you only show a small glimpse of your true self or potential self.

Noone truly maxes out on their potential, there is always a little bit more improvement to be made. But once you discover your self, you lose the fears that lead to shyness. Once you rid yourself of your insecurities, you become more and more the self that you are meant to be.

 

[icepick]

Originally posted by Mephisto
But, as long as its "You think she wants..." that is your own perceptions on things. Even if you change because she told you too, you would still be yourself, but it becomes a moral question. (Is it right to change because she told me to? The answer is no.)

No, morals have nothing to do with it.

Even if you do something that you THINK she wants you to do, that is still...your not being who you are, being what you want to do. You bend to what you THINK she wants you to do.

Stick to your guns. That's what it is all about.

Not being yourself is like the dork who asks the girl where they should go, the guy who agrees with everything the girl says, and is afraid to "offend" her.

Being yourself is when you have who YOU are (whatever you choose to be at that time) and stick to it.

Being yourself is choosing your own goals and pursuing them at any cost. I dont' think it means to act like how you THINK you should be no matter what the outside circumstances are.

Anyway, I am inarticulate today, so I hope that makes sense.

 

[Mephisto]

But if one modifies himself for a goal (say sex) by adapting himself to what he thinks a girl will want, he is doing it by himself. It may or may not be wrong, but he still made the conscious decession to do so.

Only he is in charge of his life and what he shows as himself

 

[icepick]

Too much thinking man, my brain is shorted out contemplating what you say.

All that I know is...you know how you get those 'impulses' that tell you to do things...and sometimes you hold back and NOT act on them because you are afraid of what people may think?

Well, that, to me, is not 'being yourself', because you only have OTHER people's thoughts in mind. You should only be thinking about your own thoughts. Then, when you have an impulse to do something, you DO it.

Life is more fun that way in my opinion.

 

[Mephisto]

Holding back because of the fear of others is deffinetly selling your self short. And I agree, that is not being yourself. It is almost like Sartre's "bad faith". In which people refuse to believe they are truly free to make their own choices and instead they put into religous beliefs, fate, destiny, and all that other ****e.