"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Revenge

Trumpetman

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Alright so heres the deal I have these three friends that are seniors I'm a freshman. We fool around a lot. A couple days ago I started messing around w/ one of their water bottles trying to get it all over him. It ended up with water down my pant...very wet and uncomfortable. So I got them back by firing silly string all over them. Today they got revenge on me. I walked in a room they jumped me duck taped my hand and legs, saran wrapped me up, put pink hair dye in me and silly stringed me BOY. Is there anything I can do to get back at them w/o literally getting my ass kicked?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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duke007

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Put a thumb tack on their seats.

If that doesn't work you could always try dropping an anvil on their heads.
 

Climax

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haha.. well... here is something u can do... tsk tsk tsk...

LOL!:p this is something i would expect my 13 year old brother to post... lol:D

Anyways... Buy them all a drink, but put some sleeping pills or laxitives or something that will affect them into their drinks and tell them that you baught them the drinks so that they know that it was all a joke and that there are no hard feelings... they will laugh and accept the drinks, then you all laugh, drink and have fun.... and then watch them as they either run to the bathroom or fall asleep like little babies;):p

If you go with the sleeping pills, then when they are asleep, you can do some other whack stuff to them... shave their eyebrows, dye their hair, tie them up, etc..

Knock yourself out!


Laterz...
 

Joe The Homophobe

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Watch the movie revenge of the nerds. Buy that powder they used on the football players clothing that made them itch out of control.

buy the powder, use it on your friends clothing.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Climax

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woah!

Originally posted by AverageFC
slash their tires
lol... that would just piss them off and thats not really a "joke", thats just wrong dude! revenge is "OK", but there is a limit to HOW to take revenge, and seeing as his FRIENDS just played a joke on him, slashing their tired would be a bit harssshhhhhhh:D Thats the kind of thing you wanna do to your hot teacher that refused to go down on you:rolleyes: :D


Laterz...
 

TheRelic

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Ahh... high school shenanigans...

hide an egg in their locker

break a fart bomb in their school bag

works a treat.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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AverageFC

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thats not really a "joke", thats just wrong dude!
You need to look into the world of vandalism.

And it is a "joke". It's damn hilarious, and hard to stop laughing.
 

check_mate_kid_uk

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Re: haha.. well... here is something u can do... tsk tsk tsk...

Originally posted by ~ªêQµïTª$~
If you go with the sleeping pills, then when they are asleep, you can do some other whack stuff to them... shave their eyebrows, dye their hair, tie them up, etc..

Knock yourself out!


Laterz...
remember to make it a kodak momment! just would not be fun untill you take shots of them in embarsing positions such as putting there hands on eahc others croches or even there heads on each others crotches so it looks like they are blowing each other! :p
 

sfalexi

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When they're passed out (either from drinking or the sleeping pill idea), shave just half of one eyebrow. That leaves them with the dilemma in the morning of whether to shave them both, or fill in that remaining half with marker and hope noone notices, or trying to shave the other eyebrow to match it.
 

check_mate_kid_uk

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Originally posted by sfalexi
When they're passed out (either from drinking or the sleeping pill idea), shave just half of one eyebrow. That leaves them with the dilemma in the morning of whether to shave them both, or fill in that remaining half with marker and hope noone notices, or trying to shave the other eyebrow to match it.
thats clever because if you shave it all then whats done is done but this way they got to make a decision and if they make a bad decision they will feel regret for a while.

this seems like its all a joke, all in good fun but they took it a bit to far. I think that by giving them sleeping pills you are going way to far making it not a joke anymore unless you can find a better way to get them back i would leave it because by giving them sleeping pills you are esculating it to far, laxative on the other hand is not to far, obviously you have to think of the best time to give them it otherwise it will not be such a good revenge. how about before a date!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Jariel

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Inject them with heroin when they're asleep and they'll wake up with a nasty addiction they can't explain!
 
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