Restaurant Pickup

[LeSpy]

Hey all,

I'm a regular at a restaurant nearby my office and over time I've developed a good rapport with the host there. Its at the point now where she'll hang by and shoot the breeze with me about personal crap that she does.

I'm at the point now where I want to make a move to get her digits to hang out with her. I was thinking to just be direct and ask her out to drinks or coffee but was thinking that may be too direct in front of people who work at the place. As an alternate approach I was thinking of a more indirect way by giving her my card and contact info but that is too weak right?

What do you guys think? I'd be interested in similar pickups you've done/tried in these kind of venues.

Thanks

 

[The Bat]

Go direct. Who cares about what other people see/think/hear? If she likes you, she will happily accept. If not, then she will hesitate or give you an excuse.

 

[Dante1a]

First of all, you didn't really mention how long it has taken for you to build the rapport with the hostess. That will have an effect on things..

But, The Bat is right. Direct is almost always better.

Out of curiosity, what signs of her potential sexual interest are you getting? (Besides talking to you regularly.) - This doesn't mean you shouldn't act if you aren't getting many, btw.

One other thought is that you should probably come up with something fun that is adventurous and mixes something that both you and she like (based on what you know from your conversations with her). Then, she can use the thing you are doing together as a good excuse to go.

Ask with confidence, like it's nothing at all.

Just some thoughts.

 

[HeadLightsOn]

I have been in this situation a couple of times. Personally I always try and get a small amount of background. Does she have bfriend/husband? Does she have KIDS? Is she sane? (You can glean quite a lot about this from normal conversation).

If you think its green on those points, wait for a slight lull in the patrons, and suggest to her what you want to do for a meet up/date/whatever.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear LeSpy,
I get the feeling that you are very clearly in the Friend Zone,in her case perhaps the "Valued"Friend Zone....Oh a Babe like that has plenty of offers...Many years ago,I used to work till Ten in the evening,lecturing,then go off to socialise with a few of my Students in a well known Night Club,till about two in the morning...Aah,so many lovely memories,the Dancing,drinking and Womanising were fantastic....Life was soo good then....But to get to the point...About 11.30 a new genre of clients would arrive,the resteuranteurs and their hangers on...what a cliquey group they were....almost a Free Masonry to break into their circle...In general,the bosses and maitre D's were screwing the waitresses and baristas....you didn't get within coo-eee distance....Sure give her the card but only to establish your bona fides,if you wait for her to respond,you will grow old and grey....So next step if you are really wanting to mix it with a Street Wise Kid,check out when she finishes work,then check out the closest nightclub.....You are there at closing time and just innocently say.....Oh I generally pop along to the "Down Under" (Or wherever) for a drink and dance about this time,care to join me?....You will get a response....I wouldn't bother if it were me.

 

[scrouds]

Hey all,

I'm a regular at a restaurant nearby my office and over time I've developed a good rapport with the host there. Its at the point now where she'll hang by and shoot the breeze with me about personal crap that she does.

I'm at the point now where I want to make a move to get her digits to hang out with her. I was thinking to just be direct and ask her out to drinks or coffee but was thinking that may be too direct in front of people who work at the place. As an alternate approach I was thinking of a more indirect way by giving her my card and contact info but that is too weak right?

What do you guys think? I'd be interested in similar pickups you've done/tried in these kind of venues.

Thanks

My advice: Don't hit on her, don't ask her out. Having a friend at your local is good. There are billions of chicks in the world, go hit on others and keep her as a friend.