Ressisting the urge to dip the pen in company ink.

[PokerStar]

Hey Guys,

I know we shouldnt be macking on or even dating someone who works for the same company as you. I have lived by this rule for quite sometime reason being I never found anyone that attractive. When I did find someone that was hot as hell, I was too afc to pull it off anyway(4 years ago).

Fast forward today, my department eats lunch on the 8th floor very often and one day this hot chick came into warm up her lunch. I couldnt help but to flirt with her and drop a few funny lines.

Found out that she works on the same floor as the lunch room so I make sure I pass by her desk every so often to say hi.

So today, I decided to have alittle convo with her after lunch. to my surprise we do have a lot stuff in common. She likes the same type of food i eat, shes likes watching the UFC and had also trained in jiu jitsu which I take.

Usually, if I find this out about a woman, i get their number and maybe 4 or 5 days later we are on a date. Now, i know that getting her number and asking her out is not the problem. My problem is what everyone here says about dating in someone from the same company.

So I ask you to please remind me what could happen if the relationship coould turn sour? and if you were in my position would you pursue or just completely forget about it?

thanks guys.

 

[Warrior74]

Hey Guys,

I know we shouldnt be macking on or even dating someone who works for the same company as you. I have lived by this rule for quite sometime reason being I never found anyone that attractive. When I did find someone that was hot as hell, I was too afc to pull it off anyway(4 years ago).

Fast forward today, my department eats lunch on the 8th floor very often and one day this hot chick came into warm up her lunch. I couldnt help but to flirt with her and drop a few funny lines.

Found out that she works on the same floor as the lunch room so I make sure I pass by her desk every so often to say hi.

So today, I decided to have alittle convo with her after lunch. to my surprise we do have a lot stuff in common. She likes the same type of food i eat, shes likes watching the UFC and had also trained in jiu jitsu which I take.

Usually, if I find this out about a woman, i get their number and maybe 4 or 5 days later we are on a date. Now, i know that getting her number and asking her out is not the problem. My problem is what everyone here says about dating in someone from the same company.

So I ask you to please remind me what could happen if the relationship coould turn sour? and if you were in my position would you pursue or just completely forget about it?

thanks guys.

I've done it with no consequences, but mainly because it was an intern. There are several couples at my job who met on the job. It's not uncommon. The main reason most guys here (including myself) preach against it is because of the cons. The cons include,

1. The relationship going bad, now you are stuck working with this person.
2. You turning AFC, now she walks all over you and it ruins your professional relationship.
3. You playing her or not giving her what she wants and she brings the drama to the work place and it threatens your job.
4. Picking a crazy BDP and again, problems at your job


What minimizes the damage.
1. Not being in the same department
2. Neither one of you being in the other's chain of command
3. A platinum reputation that can sustain a negative hit.
4. The ability to keep your mouth closed about personal matters at work
5. Keeping your emotions under control if things go bad.
6. Having a job that you don't care that much about losing.


For the most part it's just better to avoid a potentially bad situation. But if you must, qualify, qualify, qualify. Try to really know what kind of person she is and her history of past relationships. If you see any red flags, bail before you nail her.

I was under investigation for a sexual harassment claim from an employee who I supervised (via notes and email) who I did not even work the same shift with. The claim was completely false and a part of a conspiracy between the girl and my supervisor to remove me, I was a threat to my super and she wanted to be promoted to my job. And while cleared of any wrong doing, it left a stain on my reputation that lasted the entire time I worked there. I wouldn't even be alone in the room with a female employee because I knew that any accusation would be the excuse for management to give me the boot. Only my sterling reputation and my quality work ethic and specialized knowledge (and the fact that I was innocent) saved my ass. But it sucks when everyone is looking at you like the company lecher.

Since then I have dated a couple of interns/employees but it was always very quiet and only after their internships/employment were over.

 

[Iceberg]

A lot of people will tell you not to do it, but I say screw it (her).

I'm not much younger than you, and I have no problem dating women I work with. Neither do my coworkers. Hell, my supervisor banged an intern like 2 months ago.

I've had a couple relationships go sour. Worst thing that happened was we stopped talking. No workplace brawls or anything. And really, I'm focused on my career in the big picture, so I never really settle at one company for more than 2-3 years anyway.

In summary: attraction is attraction - I'm not gonna let some job that I'll probably leave in a year or so talk me out of getting with a girl I like.

Disclaimer: I work in an adverting agency - where drinking, smoking, and banging isn't really all that frowned upon. It's actually kinda encouraged.