Response to a question asked by a HB8

[the_one]

Ok.. I have been cooresponding with a HB 8 for a few weeks and mentioned today that she would have fun with me. She responded with, "Oh yeah.. What would we do on our date" What follows in my response to her verbatim. It was in an email and I simply copied and pasted. My question would be.. Am I sounding like a wuss, or an AFC?

My Message:
Ahh.. Now this is a complicated question.. There are many variables that would factor into that. First of all, the first time we met I would want it to be casual and unintimidating.. Something that allowed us an opportunity to talk and get to know a little about each other, but still offered enough fun to prevent any awkward silence. After I knew you a little, I would try and do things that I learned while listening to you.. I would be searching for the things that I think you enjoy the most, but might not do a lot, or haven't done since you were very young.. Like, if you told me you loved to go ice skating when you were little but haven't done it in 20 years.. I would probably tell you we were going bowling, then slide into the ice skating rink. It all depends on the things I pick up while listening to you..

Their are a lot of idea's that race through my head.. I always enjoyed taking a short hike, finding a nice spot off the trail maybe overlooking a cut or ravine.. Brush off a nice moss covered stump and have a picnic, drink a glass of wine and just enjoy the niceties that nature offers..

I am not a go to dinner, go to movie, go to bar kinda guy.. I want to do things that are fun and exciting, and when I meet someone I want to do things that they think are fun and exciting too..

Nonetheless, to much thought could go into such an answer, if enough hasn't already. My true actions would be much more spontaneous, and not so thought out..

The classy, jazz factory, ****tail nights are important too. But, they wouldn't be the foundation

 

[SamePendo]

WTF? Ask her out.

Edit - Oh, ok. Read Anti-Dump´s machine. Only speak when asked, and keep it short. Try being like a ... onion.. with lots of layers. But just dont make her cry!

 

[the_one]

I did, we are going out.. I was only wondering if I went way overboard their.. Which apparently I did.. Dammit.. I've always been a nice guy, or the smart guy.. I am still learning here, I don't want to make the mistake again.

 

[GloriouslyInsane]

An true afc would say "what do YOU want to do?".You could spice up your response a bit or keep it a bit shorter but only staying away from the answer i wrote is good enough.

 

[hanlinting]

yep you sounded AFC don't answer that kind of question directly always lead them on like you will see when we go out...

 

[reyalp]

a while back one of my girls asked me a similar question

her: where are we going tomorrow?
me: i'm taking you to Breaux Jewelers, you're going to rob the store and tell em make me a grill

she got a kick out of that.

the next morning, she calls me, tells me "i just heard Grillz on the radio and thought about you!"

so i've started using it more often (once when one said something about needing a job), and i've gotten a couple of calls from one or two other girls about Grillz making them think of me.

 

[the_one]

I like the "Grillz" references.. Thats funny sh1t.. I'm still learning.. I've always been the nice guy/smart guy and the gentleman, and had decent success.. I am trying to jump out of that shell now.. I obviously need more practice.

 

[xblitz44x]

I can't get over the fact that you used the words: variables, ravine, and niceties. Maybe it works for your persona but I'd be laughed at.

Sounds like she's interested though so instead of saying "I'd do this" or "I'd do that".... tell her you're picking her up at 7.

 

[the_one]

Yeah.. After reading it again I sound like such a d1ckweed.. We are going out this weekend.. Oddly, she tells me that its my responses to her that stand out.

 

[xblitz44x]

Good for you! They were unique, that's for sure. It showed off your imagination which I'm sure is a change from the usual: "ugh, we'll go out to eat then maybe come back to my place and watch a movie". Now you just have to put your money where your mouth (or e-mail) is.

 

[the_one]

She is 16 years my senior as well, that could have a lot to do with it.. But she is smoking hot..

 

[Thomas94305]

the_one..

be careful of playing her games.. she's 16 years your senior, so she's comfortable with some testing. If she wants to find out what you'd do on a date or in situation xyz, tell her she needs to get into situation xyz to find out. Otherwise, she gets to judge you, if you are a worthy person, without even building a relationship; that's not her right. If she wants to find out intimate details with you, I'd make her have a close relationship, and only share things in that context.

Suggest you ask yourself what kind of relationship you want right now with anyone, not just her. Then start going for that goal. I doubt you want a relationship where a woman plays games. If you are having problems just pursuing your relationship goals, then that points to deeper issues, like feeling insecure about if you can attain this, feeling uncomfortable approaching other women and getting stuck in one-itus..etc.

Good luck.. keep us posted

Tom

 

[Potbelly]

that was like an essay man.

 

[Latinoman]

Ok.. I have been cooresponding with a HB 8 for a few weeks and mentioned today that she would have fun with me. She responded with, "Oh yeah.. What would we do on our date" What follows in my response to her verbatim. It was in an email and I simply copied and pasted. My question would be.. Am I sounding like a wuss, or an AFC?

Why would you answer her something like that...taking the element of surprise (for better or worst) out of the equation? If she wants to know...then she should allow you to show her.

Note: I didn't even read your response to her.

 

[Latinoman]

If she is 16 years your senior...you can rest assure that she is not looking for a "relationship". She just want to get laid. She might look "smoking hot", but she has some VERY serious issues when she is being overlooked.

A woman 16 years my senior (regardless if I'm 20 or 30), better get ready to $$$ and for sex. That's all I have to say. (Note: ignore my last remark - LOL)

 

[far from average]

I'd have said to her, "I guess you'll have to find out. How's [insert date and time here] sound?"