Response from POF chick

[Blackmm]

I've been going back and forth with this girl on POF and was setting up a meeting with her. The convo follows...

Me: I was thinking maybe meeting in front of **** theater. We can go somewhere to talk and have dinner from there.

Her: I'll let you know .....I really don't want to tell you yes and I'm not ready. I've had some bad situations from here and I'm kinda fed up at this point. Not blaming you at all for anything anybody else has done....just trying to be safe....

I haven't responded yet and am thinking of using the "radio silence" routine and not respond, but what do you guys think?

 

[49au]

You guys haven't talked on the phone? In my experience with POF, building comfort over the phone is critical to getting her to let her guard down and meet up.

There are a lot of freaks and creepy guys on these sites (I've heard some crazy stories from girls I've met online), maybe she did legitimately have a bad experience and it's not low interest. The remedy to that is not silence, it's showing that you are not desperate and taking the pressure off.

(btw - having dinner as a first meetup with someone you met online is never really a good idea)

 

[joverby]

WTF, did this chick get raped from some guy on there or something?

You asked to meet in a public "safe" place right? If it's an open area w/ other people and what not I'm inclined to believe it might just be a B.S. excuse.

No counter-offer to top it off, I might go radio silence.

49 has a good point though, I need to keep that in mind about the phone call first. Makes sense, if you don't sound like a "creeper" and are witty etc. would be a lot easier.

If you got her # , call her.

 

[Sue Madre]

Say something like this. Silence won't work, you might have to change this line up a bit, I jacked it from some other player site.

You seem have a lot of qualities. But I don’t know much about you… That’s why I wanted to meet you, just for the sake of getting to know you better… But once you tell me that you don’t want to meet me, I immediately forget all the sweet words you use to tell me and think you’re just trying to dump me or something like this. Maybe you’re not a stereotypical girl, I may be wrong. Am I?

 

[joverby]

Any smart(not desperate) girl would see right through that IMO, bro.....

 

[49au]

I agree that you should just forget about her if you think this is a case of low IL, my response is only applicable if you think there is some interest but not enough comfort has been built yet.

 

[Sue Madre]

Any smart girl would see right through that IMO, bro.....

You would be surprised how many times that stuff worked for me, they aren't smart.

 

[49au]

Here's one of the funny stories I heard from a girl I dated last year on POF. 22, solid 8. This is probably one of the dumbest women I've ever met, as evidenced by this story:

Her first date from POF - she agrees to meet the guy at his house. She comes in and asks to use the bathroom. He points it out. She's sitting in there taking a piss and he opens the door and looks at her. She pushes the door shut and locks it.

At this point she tells me, "I was trying to figure out if I should continue with the date or just leave."

There was no date 2 for us either.

 

[Iceberg]

Say something like this. Silence won't work, you might have to change this line up a bit, I jacked it from some other player site.

Whoa. That sounds way too serious a message to send some chick you haven't met yet. Dating is supposed to be fun, ya know. I wouldn't want to know anyone who talks like that....let alone date them.

(btw - having dinner as a first meetup with someone you met online is never really a good idea)

Dinner is the worst kind of date. I usually reserve that for real girlfriends. Or at least someone I banged a few times.

Sitting there watching each other chew. It's boring and awkward.

 

[Sue Madre]

Whoa. That sounds way too serious a message to send some chick you haven't met yet. Dating is supposed to be fun, ya know. I wouldn't want to know anyone who talks like that....let alone date them.

I told him to change it up, that message was just a template.

 

[Blackmm]

Maybe I should of added that I originally suggested meeting up and she responded "when and where and I don't do clubs "

 

[Sue Madre]

Maybe I should of added that I originally suggested meeting up and she responded "when and where and I don't do clubs "

then what did you say? You should have said "Starbucks at 8pm on ---- street". Maybe you blew it

 

[Blackmm]

then what did you say? You should have said "Starbucks at 8pm on ---- street". Maybe you blew it

So basically my offer wasn't good enough, so instead of a "uhh, I forgot I'm washing my hair that night" line, I got the **** and bull story about wanting to keep it safe.

 

[Stagger Lee]

Maybe I should of added that I originally suggested meeting up and she responded "when and where and I don't do clubs "

When a girl tells me this I just proceed with plans to take her to a pub. Afterall a pub is not a club, and the whole "I don't do clubs" is more or less a sh!t test. To respond by taking her to dinner would be failing the sh!t test IMO.

 

[Jaylan]

I told him to change it up, that message was just a template.

in that case, template fail.