"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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responding to their silly excuses for flaking

true romance

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Brian

Try to be funny, flirt, don't care attitude...make her feel like she know you for long time. You answer should be off the hook a bit, make her laugh...


reply: can you drop the movies at my place around 7 pm on wed..tues..xxx? but there will be a late fee charge of $50 and a back rub or you can cook dinner for 2 of us and we can watch sex in the city :)? ( don't puke :)
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

brian123

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true romance said:
Brian

Try to be funny, flirt, don't care attitude...make her feel like she know you for long time. You answer should be off the hook a bit, make her laugh...


reply: can you drop the movies at my place around 7 pm on wed..tues..xxx? but there will be a late fee charge of $50 and a back rub or you can cook dinner for 2 of us and we can watch sex in the city :)? ( don't puke :)

How about

"You'd better be sorry for being MIA for so long and you've had those movies for a long time, so thats going to be a BIG late fee."
 

Igetit!

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That thing she said about things being "super crazy" is a super lie. Men and women date each other. Both men and women have lives of their own,their own jobs,friends,hobbies,etc. Both of us do. So why is it that when it comes to dating we men can find the time to spend with a woman,but all of the sudden,these women are super busy with this and that and whatever?
Simple. It's because they're lying. I honestly,truely believe that. I really do.
Some things are just plain simple to me. If a girl wants to spend time with you,then she'll spend time with you. If she doesn't,then she won't. It's just that simple. I dated this girl one time,and we had plans to meet up at a park at 4:00. I got there 5 minutes early,and I waited until 4:20,4:25 then I started to leave. I got in my car and I was headed home,then all of the sudden,I saw her in her car headed to the park. So I turned around and headed back to the park,and we got there at the same time. After we got out of our cars, I told her that I was just about to leave and that I wasn't going to wait for her all day. The next time we had a date at the park,she beat me there. I arrived 5 minutes early,and she was already there waiting for me. I asked her why she got there so early,and she said that she didn't want to be late,but really it was because she knew that I wasn't going to sit around all day waiting for her. All that talk about,"Well, I had to do this"or"I was busy"or"I had to meet my friend" when she already knew you had the date planned is a bunch of crap. I don't believe a woman can have a job and show up there on time every day,or have the common curtesy and consideration to call her employer if she is going to be late,but when it comes to dating,all of the sudden,out of the blue,she's so busy with this and that,or she fell asleep,or she "forgot" or whatever the excuse is. So yeah, like I said earlier,in my opinion whenever you get one of these 1000 excuses,she's lying.
 

brian123

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I do agree. I think she was partly lying. IDK. Why didn't she just not tell me about the movies (I wasn't asking for them) and why did she feel like she had to give me that excuse?
 

Igetit!

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Well,you said that you had been pursuing her too much. My guess is that even though it might have been too much,she kind of got used to your pursing. Then when you stopped,she missed you. That would explain that "Hey stranger" comment from her. Even though she missed you,the problem with pursing too much is that you gave her validation. It felt good that a guy was after her. Remember, women are emotional creatures. You gave her emotions and made her feel good without her having to lift a finger to do anything. If she's already getting what she wants from you(an ego boost),then why would she want to go out on a date with you? What for?
She already getting validation that she is desirable. She feels wanted,attractive,and all of this she gets from you without having to dating you. Actually,it's a pretty good deal on her part. I think she sent you the text because she needs another refill of reasurrance that she's desirable again. Then once you start to chase her again,her cup gets filled,then the flaking will start up again and so the cycle continues.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Mavrick

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brian123 said:
I txt'd her back (after waiting a day) with "Thanks for reminding me about the movies. Ill have to get them back sometime"


Right away she answered back with "Not a problem! Sorry I have been mia lately, things have been super crazy just let me know when you want to get together and we can get you your movies!"

It's funny, she keeps her place super clean, so I know she just didn't "find" the movies.


2 cents anyone?
Tell her to mail them to you.

No, really, tell her to drop them off sometime, but keep the meeting short because you're going to be heading out the door to go do something or someone. What you're trying to do is break her. You want her to wonder why all of the sudden you're not begging for her attention.

I see guys try so hard when all they really had to do was just be themselves and be secure in every action they made.

I'll give you an example. I dated this girl who would never call me. I made all the calls, but I really understood why. She was just old fashion, but I told her what I felt about it. I let her know that I like to be called sometimes, too. So, I stopped calling her completely. 2 weeks after no calls, she was calling me all the time and asking me what I was up to. Of course, she waited to long, and I lost my desire for her, but it's still a damn good example.
 

brian123

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Mavrick said:
Tell her to mail them to you.

No, really, tell her to drop them off sometime, but keep the meeting short because you're going to be heading out the door to go do something or someone. What you're trying to do is break her. You want her to wonder why all of the sudden you're not begging for her attention.

I see guys try so hard when all they really had to do was just be themselves and be secure in every action they made.

I'll give you an example. I dated this girl who would never call me. I made all the calls, but I really understood why. She was just old fashion, but I told her what I felt about it. I let her know that I like to be called sometimes, too. So, I stopped calling her completely. 2 weeks after no calls, she was calling me all the time and asking me what I was up to. Of course, she waited to long, and I lost my desire for her, but it's still a damn good example.

I never responded back to her last txt at all. I'd def like to take her for a test drive, and pretty sure I could if I got together with her.
 

drift king

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i keep getting apologies during our meetings for why she's late or didn't reply etc.. i went on a 2nd date last week and i remember from our first date when she was late that as long as she doesn't do it again then she's forgiven..

this time round i completely forgot i said that and halfway through our date she apologised for being late again and how she tries to be punctual but blah blah reason happened.. it's like i need to be firm and tell it like it is.. he reason was she just moved into a new apartment and her neighbour is around the same age so her and her flatmate were all having a girly chat while im standing outside waiting for her to come...

she seemed to get more excited about having a girly chat with her new girlfriends than being out with me.. not a good sign.. what should i have said?

in conclusion what would be the best things to say when they profusely apologise for doing something wrong?

i already gave the don't do it again speech.. but it's like going around in circles.

i also brought up how when we made arrangements last week she didn't get back to me that day.. then u could see she got annoyed and said she was moving etc etc.. i didn't want to dwell on it too much.
 

jafyk

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I think most of the advice here are on point. My suggestion for you would be to set your dates at places that are convenient for you so that if she flakes it wouldn't matter much. Example have her come to your place or a place you can chill even if she wasn't in the equation. The thing with when a girl flakes is that some part of you wants to give her a benefit of the doubt that maybe next time she will show. The funny thing is that women flake because they supposedly don't wanna hurt your feelings by coming right out and saying "I can't come because I'm not interested anymore bla bla..." The thing is that the part where they think they are being nice (better yet cowardly) is the part that hurts the most. I've often entertained the thought of just gaming a chick just to flake or dump her. I think this is a dare we ought to do on here,lol.
 

Effington

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I met a girl through a mutual friend awhile ago that was kind of like that. She's a really cute girl and pretty flirty, which is why at first I thought it was weird when she didn't have many friends. She said her longest relationship has been 2 months.

After I got to know her a little better, it started to make a little more sense. She's a pretty big attention wh0re. Apparently she surfs plenty of fish all day and talks to tons of guys, inviting them places and flaking. Then she reports back to us how many guys hit on her. It's pretty dumb.

After talking with a bunch of mutual friends, she flakes on everyone on a regular basis, which is why she doesn't have many friends. I've stopped calling her as well. It's only a shame because she's cute and come on, who doesn't like flirting. She plays the ditsy role so well it's hard to tell if she's actually an idiot or her entire life is just some psychological experiment, which she claims she wants to go back to school to study. It makes sense that crazy people are into psychology, though.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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