"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Responding to "I love you"

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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unorthodox

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She was just playing you, and she succeeded. If she asks who else you love, change that who to what, and answer... That, do you love your grandmother, is testing if you're a baby. If you answer, you are, and if you don't she'll get you in other ways. You gotta reverse it at first sign she playing you. Say, oh wow, you sure want to know a lot about me, like you want a husband or something. No lols, or faces, just say that straight up.
 
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