"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Resolution...am I really that blind?

seek&destroy

Don Juan
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All things came to an end. I told my bud what she told me, we confronted her and it turned out that she made the whole thing up cuz she knew she couldn't keep her story up with my bud right beside me. It turns out that it was him who stood up for me, telling her that I obviously wanted her that night and that he knew why I left. It also happens so that she was the one pushing it all forward and he was cold towards all that time, trying to do the impossible. When he told me he wasn't interested, he meant it. I got way ahead of myself there.

The worst thing is that she started a rumor at the store about me and my bud and how we're just interested in "getting laid" (another friend overheard her saying that to someone else in the break room). Snake? Yeah, but also the biggest and dumbest ***** I ever encountered in my entire life...THE END!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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seek&destroy

Don Juan
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Moofahsa said:
You high man? what are you talking about?
check my previous post...basiacally i was convinced my bud was about to make out with the girl i was mackin on all night...and i got pissed at him when she told me what happened and i believed her for a bit. after a while i told my bud exactly what she told me, we went and confronted her and threw her lie right in her face in front of one of her co-workers, who was the same girl she was talking to before at lunch break...i must admit it was pretty funny.
 
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