"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Remember my ex!! - Getting sh*t off my chest

Crissco

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Basically I tried to brake it off completely with her today. She would not leave. She kept saying im not walking away from you after all this time I put in, ill wait, crying her eyes out numerous of times..etc

I kept walking away, holding my ground, tried to get her out of the house. Didnt work. By the end of it I was sooo drained and tired I didnt even know what to say anymore. I never really gave in, but all i had in my mind was i have to end this, but she kept refusing. Saying she loved me, I take the easy way out(which is true). Love is hard but we can make it work...

Basically at the end I got her to calm down, she has this I won feeling i saw in her face. Like she had me. I called her out and she said no, but I have a feeling shes lieing about that. She kept her stuff here, kept kissing me, told her she loves me. I just didnt say it back, I kept pulling away a bit again but held her. I wanted my alone time but didnt want to loose her, bc I was emotionally drained and not on point.


I took her to the door, told her im going to go to the gym...Told me she loved me again, I didnt say it back, then she was a bit pissed as she left.

Funny part is she doesnt know who I really am. The amount of girls I bang, have over...She said to me last night "You dont know how to play that game" Because we were talking about one of my other "girlfriends" she knows about and she hates her bc she thinks shes manipulative.

I have no idea how to get this girl out of my life and start fresh.

But maybe she is right, I am scared of a commitment, and that im taking the easy way out.


Chris
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Black Dog

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Crissco said:
Funny part is she doesnt know who I really am. The amount of girls I bang, have over...She said to me last night "You dont know how to play that game" Because we were talking about one of my other "girlfriends" she knows about and she hates her bc she thinks shes manipulative.
Sounds a little like someone who is closed off, and yeah, not ready for deep commitment

But F*** what this girl thinks!
 

Crissco

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Black Dog said:
Sounds a little like someone who is closed off, and yeah, not ready for deep commitment

But F*** what this girl thinks!
I understand where ur coming from bro, but i think thats wrong to think all the time. Sometimes you have to put others feelings into context.

She cares about me, i care about her, but honestly i dont want to spend every damn day together with her. If i say the wrong thing she crys...

And yea i am a closed off in a way...but then i keep telling my self im running away from something
 

Scars

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Sounds like she has more abandonment issues rather than a case of high interest. Accusing one of your plates of being "manipulative" is also pretty catty. Sounds like she is actually the manipulative one, or tries to be at least. Breaking up with my BPD ex was kinda the same way. It was hard to get her off my balls, and she never truly did until she found a new victim to leech on. For now, just go no contact. Holding her and continuing to kiss her is also a mistake. You are giving her mixed signals. You need to make it absolutely clear that you want nothing to do with her, and give her no inclination otherwise.

All this "scared of commitment" sympathy-seeking bullsh!t is just her brain washing you. Snap out of it. She is putting you in the frame she loves. You're just a confused young man who has a whole lot to give, and love, but you just haven't found the right girl to "change" you. She wants to be put in the roll where she can "save" you because she loves fixing things, except for herself.

This girl is no good man. But you already know that. Stop leading her on. Be absolutely mean and disgustingly rude to her if you have to, but let that b!tch know that it's over. Demand her to grab her sh!t and leave, and if she doesn't then threaten to call the cops and assign a restraining order. Get this succubus off your balls for good.

-Scars
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Crissco

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Scars said:
Sounds like she has more abandonment issues rather than a case of high interest. Accusing one of your plates of being "manipulative" is also pretty catty. Sounds like she is actually the manipulative one, or tries to be at least. Breaking up with my BPD ex was kinda the same way. It was hard to get her off my balls, and she never truly did until she found a new victim to leech on. For now, just go no contact. Holding her and continuing to kiss her is also a mistake. You are giving her mixed signals. You need to make it absolutely clear that you want nothing to do with her, and give her no inclination otherwise.

All this "scared of commitment" sympathy-seeking bullsh!t is just her brain washing you. Snap out of it. She is putting you in the frame she loves. You're just a confused young man who has a whole lot to give, and love, but you just haven't found the right girl to "change" you. She wants to be put in the roll where she can "save" you because she loves fixing things, except for herself.

This girl is no good man. But you already know that. Stop leading her on. Be absolutely mean and disgustingly rude to her if you have to, but let that b!tch know that it's over. Demand her to grab her sh!t and leave, and if she doesn't then threaten to call the cops and assign a restraining order. Get this succubus off your balls for good.

-Scars
I love ya bro..You always hit the nail on the head.

The whole time she was talking about me, I knew it was about her. And i know about her abandonment issues with her dad, no biggie. I kept her around because she did everything for me. Spend 120 dollars on cigarettes for me, went food shopping, drove me wherever i want, wanted sex all the time. You name it, i had it with this girl. She was good to me but i always felt is was because she needed praise or love in return.
 

Crissco

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Ive given this girl every emotion in the book, which could also be another reason she "loves" me.
 

Scars

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Crissco said:
I love ya bro..You always hit the nail on the head.

The whole time she was talking about me, I knew it was about her. And i know about her abandonment issues with her dad, no biggie. I kept her around because she did everything for me. Spend 120 dollars on cigarettes for me, went food shopping, drove me wherever i want, wanted sex all the time. You name it, i had it with this girl. She was good to me but i always felt is was because she needed praise or love in return.
I know what you mean. My girl gave me sex whenever I wanted. Any time, anywhere. If she was on her period she'd still let me hit it (if I wanted) or she'd at least give me a BJ without question. She bought my clothes for me, put gas in my car, bought me drinks, bought me food, picked me up from random places because I was way too wasted to drive, bought me a $100 tattoo, painted me pictures, wrote me letters, and even started her own blog about me. If he went out, she would proudly cling to me, you'd never see her not within a 10 foot radius of me. She was either always on my arm, holding my hand, or staring at me.

But it got so suffocating.

These are the hardest girls to walk away from, but they are the ones you absolutely need to walk from the most. This is NOT high interest. These girls have issues. They always have some sort of past trauma. Whether it's abandonment issues, rape, sexual abuse.. whatever. These girls aren't healthy. Everyone likes to be loved and praised, but these types take it way too far. I know you know what I mean.

Take some time and reflect if you need to. Just because you're leaving her doesn't mean it's going to be EASY or you're not going to care, because deep down, you do. Otherwise we both wouldn't be posting in this thread right now. But do us both a favor and don't retreat back. It's okay to be bummed, but don't show it. Take the time you need to reflect, but understand that this is the best decision for you right now.

-Scars
 

Crissco

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Scars said:
I know what you mean. My girl gave me sex whenever I wanted. Any time, anywhere. If she was on her period she'd still let me hit it (if I wanted) or she'd at least give me a BJ without question. She bought my clothes for me, put gas in my car, bought me drinks, bought me food, picked me up from random places because I was way too wasted to drive, bought me a $100 tattoo, painted me pictures, wrote me letters, and even started her own blog about me. If he went out, she would proudly cling to me, you'd never see her not within a 10 foot radius of me. She was either always on my arm, holding my hand, or staring at me.

But it got so suffocating.

These are the hardest girls to walk away from, but they are the ones you absolutely need to walk from the most. This is NOT high interest. These girls have issues. They always have some sort of past trauma. Whether it's abandonment issues, rape, sexual abuse.. whatever. These girls aren't healthy. Everyone likes to be loved and praised, but these types take it way too far. I know you know what I mean.

Take some time and reflect if you need to. Just because you're leaving her doesn't mean it's going to be EASY or you're not going to care, because deep down, you do. Otherwise we both wouldn't be posting in this thread right now. But do us both a favor and don't retreat back. It's okay to be bummed, but don't show it. Take the time you need to reflect, but understand that this is the best decision for you right now.

-Scars
I know exactly what you mean bro. It got way to suffocating.

Ive been here for a while and been around the block a bit so i know all the manipulative games, tricks, and bulls*it girls do.

When I found out about her father issues i should of walked away then but i didnt. Cuz i saw the good in all she wanted to do for me, plus my selfish side took over and said i can get free things out of this..Time grew, we grew together...You know the story..

You couldn't of said it better about it being abandonment issues rather then high IL. It honestly hurts to know the reality now but it what it is and i have to accept it and move on.

Plus. I can get hotter then her ;)
 
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