Relationship Cold Wars

[Blues]

Those guys who have been in LTRs before would have been through a couple of cold wars after a fight/quarrel. Then its a waiting game to see who caves in first. Esp when both parties feel they are in the right so ego gets in the way.

How do you guiys handle such stuff? Do you just wait until yr gf initiates contact or will you make the first move?

Personally i find such **** damn childish and irritating. It gets to me. Not becos i miss her like hell but its a waste of time. But i feel tht if i give in too many times she will start to take it for granted and think her **** doesnt stink.

Feedback appreciated

Thanks

 

[FollowTheWhiteRabbit]

It shouldnt be a waiting game, are you two done arguing? If so then man up, drop the topic and take her out somewhere for something fun that you want to do or would have normally done and act as if nothing is wrong. If you already said what you needed to say then its done, and nothing is wrong.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

You can't stop her from holding a grudge and playing childish games. YOU on the otherhand, can choose to do something different and move on. This holds true if you are still together or if you've decided to 'next' her. Is it really worth allowing someone else to control your emotions?

 

[Glenfiddich101]

Well, how this cold war came abt was due to an arguement over the weekend.

We went cycling at the park and we came across 2 joggers who were jogging on the cycling path.

All of a sudeen she said out loud "Some pple have no damn consideration! They shld use the damn jogging path instead!" or something to this effect.

I was prety embarresed so to speak. I mean just overtake those joggers and thts it. No one is calling you a fool if you dont speak out.

She was not happy when i told her abt it. My take on it was its not safe for a girl to shoot her mouth as and when she likes. What if she were to say **** like this to a bunch of thugs and they retaliate? Am i suppose to get into some lame fight becos of this?

This lead to a big quarrel and this stupid cold war.

Am i making a big issue out of this or shld i be concerned my gf has such a trait?

 

[MacDiddy]

Next her... a couple of incidents a year is okay, but a constant stream of it is not worth it...

Plus.. you might not be the man in charge of the relationship... trying to establish that now is next to impossible..

A DJ doesn't fight or argue or have to play these games... She should know better...

GlenF- you were well within your rights to voice your concerns... you gf sound like a biatch with bigger balls than you... she's out of control... you should be concerned... In divorce you'll expect ten times the ferocity...

 

[CLOONEY]

haha, god some of you guys have no idea! What if he has been with her for years, everything is good and just occassionally, he has a fight over something stupid? If anything, it can just add spice to the relationship! Makes for an interesting play of emotions!

I am guessing you are only new together though, a few months? And you are both young still? Especially her! If all else is good, just tell her to grow up and not take things so seriously! If there are many other annoyances about her, as people here always jump in to say....next!

 

[BigFoot]

Interesting post Blues. I've often wondered about this too. What I've done in the past that seems to work is: I stop calling or contacting her for a while and usually she will call after about 1 week. If not, I will call at some point. It all depends on the dynamics of the situation and how serious the issue is. How long to wait depends on indiividual circumstances - you would probably know based on past experience with her.

 

[aftershock]

I don't get into them.

I'm a man. I voice my concerns with her and she responds. I don't play cold war games.

She knows that if she started messing with my head then there would be consequences.

 

[Glenfiddich101]

Well, we tried to settle the arguement but we werent in the best of moods. so i tld her lets call it a early night an i'll see her home.

Then she got pissed with me. All i suggested was to sleep it off and she thought i wanted to break up or something. She then took all her stuff she usually leaves at my place and i saw her down.

Funny thing is she's the one always saying she wants to go home whenever we quarrel at home or refuse to meet up.

And now i'm in the wrong for suggesting an early night.

Geez.

 

[MacDiddy]

First of... if it must lead to a cold war, then a man must stand fast and win it...

However, constant repeats will take an emotional toll on the relationship and it will reduce the happiness of the chick.. And we all know what happens when she isn't happy in the relationship... She cheats!!! or leaves, but predominantly she cheats....

You need to manage the relationship such that you do not enter into a stand-off... your actions must be strong, mature, consistent and intolerant of disrespect... Obviously this does not occur overnight... Think about how you train a dog!!!

 

[zerocelcius]

wow sounds like she plays by the rules. Who cares if they were jogging in a so called cycling path. SO they were rebels... maybe your girl was PMSing.

Lay the smack down on that **** and if she wants to play games tell her to go to the playground and find a mature woman who can keep her damn mouth shout like a woman is supposed to...just playing.

No for reals that is kinda weird for her to just shout out like that. Must of had a bad day.

i say talk it out with her tell her what's up and tell her your not down for that stupid cold war games $hit.

PCZ 'N BEATS
DJ ZEROCELCIUS

 

[mrRuckus]

Originally posted by The_Shezzler
Ignorance is bliss

Just leave it, walk away and go fcuk a bakers dozen

Sarge on...:yes:

you are ridiculous.