relationship and new love?

[Soyoushave]

hi!

in short:

how do you tell a girl that you hardly ever see in real life (and weekly on chat) that you would dump your girlfriend for her, if she would want to date you?

so:
if she likes me and want to date me, I would break up for it
if she doesn't like me or want to dat me, I wouldn't break up.

yeah, ****ed up eh?

please just answer the question. Moral issues about liking girl A while having a relationship with B don't interest me

 

[Allurre]

I suggest you rethink your strategy.

There's no need to tell this girl you'll dump your actual gf to just go out for her.

You're also implicating that there's a possibility of you DOING the same unto her.

It seems like you've lost interest in your current girl. You should either break up, and try building a relationship with this new girl, or continue swimming in the sea until you find another perfect match.

 

[Soyoushave]

sorry, could you rephrase that?

the girl I'm talking about knows that I am in a relationship by the way (and she knows a lot about it, she asks me from time to time)

I'm not really not interested in my current relationship...it's just that we have had a lot of arguments and we're trying another approach (my idea).
that approach is probably gonna work, but I just want to make sure that there are some other fish in the sea, ready for the grab in case something goed wrong.

So: I want that girl to know that I would go for her if she would for me. That doesn't mean that I would do that too...I just want her to know that I would be willing to.

So how do you tell her you like her and wouldn't mind going for her (instead of current relation)?
Also, how do you do that without sounding AFC?

 

[Allurre]

Ok, I understand your case better now.

However, I would still stick to what I said before.

If you're going to tell this new girl that you'll drop your current relationship for her, it could taint your image as a boyfriend material.

Seriously, she's not going to feel "special" because you're putting her over your current girlfriend.

I've been through your situation -- the whole argument ordeal. If all you guys do is argue, take a break. Cool things off. Take this as an opportunity to date other girls.

 

[Soyoushave]

yeah!

you know exactly what I mean
By telling her that I would sacrifice, I only come off as being like jet another AFC...which I'm not.

Now about the other suggestion(breaking up)..
I told her that from now on, we're free to do and go like we wish. If there is something important (like family that has to go to hospitals, people who die and stuff) we're "allowed" to call. And we see eachother once a week (I decide when).
If this is going well, we might try more times a week. If this is going bad, it's easier to break up.

Now, this girl (not my GF) doesn't know this situation. Don't feel like explaining her either.

Now...how do I tell her that I'd go for her? (and even more important, how do I know that she wants to date me?)

Good luck on this one guys

 

[MisterMcGee]

"tell" her? wtf man, just ask her out. if your current gf is a 'problem' and you dont want to cheat, then break up with her

 

[Soyoushave]

done

it's not reallt a "future-GF-date" just meeting her...casual, no strings attached...just asked what she was doing next week and she proposed to get out and do something (even before I could ask her)