Starting a thread here for myself to track experience and progress in confronting my fear of rejection/dependence on the approval of others. The last few weeks I’ve been doing a bit of daygame for the first time in many years… it still sends my nerves crazy, but I’m making good progress..
For me this very much a personal mission to overcome longstanding fears and insecurities rooted in the need for acceptance/validation from others. I’m at a stage in my life now where I don’t really care that much anymore whether I am getting laid or have a partner… don’t get me wrong: both those things are welcome… but my relationship with myself is the only one that ultimately matters, and ‘needing’ others’ approval limits me as a human being and a man… I want to be free, and freedom is, in this area at least, an internal thing...
So I’ll be working on daygame approaches, but also other situations such as social interactions, friendships and professional relationships, to work on pushing myself out of my comfort zone and embracing experiences of disapproval or judgement from others… my experience so far has shown me that when I stay true to myself and accept other people’s disapproval, it boost my own internal sense of self-approval and empowerment… from a psychoanalytical perspective, it’s a crude model, but there’s certainly experiential truth in the fact that there’s an inverse relationship between my seeking approval from others and my inner development of self-validation…
For me this very much a personal mission to overcome longstanding fears and insecurities rooted in the need for acceptance/validation from others. I’m at a stage in my life now where I don’t really care that much anymore whether I am getting laid or have a partner… don’t get me wrong: both those things are welcome… but my relationship with myself is the only one that ultimately matters, and ‘needing’ others’ approval limits me as a human being and a man… I want to be free, and freedom is, in this area at least, an internal thing...
So I’ll be working on daygame approaches, but also other situations such as social interactions, friendships and professional relationships, to work on pushing myself out of my comfort zone and embracing experiences of disapproval or judgement from others… my experience so far has shown me that when I stay true to myself and accept other people’s disapproval, it boost my own internal sense of self-approval and empowerment… from a psychoanalytical perspective, it’s a crude model, but there’s certainly experiential truth in the fact that there’s an inverse relationship between my seeking approval from others and my inner development of self-validation…
