"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Rejected Chicks Try To Be Wingwomen

BatJuan

Don Juan
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I've had a couple experiences with the crazy lately and I wanted some input from you guys.

On multiple occasions I have rejected women who then attempted to set me up with some other random girl. For example, I was at a bar with a male friend, just watching sports on TV, and this thirsty girl hung around me for over an hour. She told me how attractive I was, how she wanted to make out with me, and she even started popping birth control. She was fugly with a really horrible personality, so I had no attraction to her. I basically ignored her and didn't do anything she told me to do. I talked only sparingly, and that drove her crazy. She ended up buying me a drink because she "only wanted to have a drink with me." But when that didn't get her anywhere, she then became obsessive about helping set me up with "those girls over there who clearly like you."

I've also had other women who have talked about setting me up with other chicks after I have rejected them outright.

What is going on here? Do they want to feel accepted in some way? Are they trying to sabotage me? Are they just looking for some form of control over me? Or are they just crazy?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Alvafe

Master Don Juan
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just consider she is crazy and let it go..... you can't go like that, caring for each things you see or happen.
 

BatJuan

Don Juan
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I don't care, I'm just noticing a pattern and was wondering the psychology behind it.
 

badboyjmm

Senior Don Juan
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Maybe the fact that she help you will, in her mind, have a change of her getting some as well.

Or maybe she realizes that she won't get anything from you but she can help you. However, don't mention anything cause she might just say those things to see your reaction.

Typically when a girl talk about setting me up with some other girls, I refuse because girls are super lazy when it comes to that and also because it's most likely BS
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
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This is a creeper girl clinging to you for her own needs. She just wants to be seen with someone she thinks is attractive. If anything she will drag your value down.

For a woman to be an effective wing woman she needs to be hot (the hotter the better), fun and she should offer you some social proof. You should not be interested in dating or FWB each other for it to work.

This girl you are talking about does not meet any of those criteria. Don't let her buy you a drink. Say something like "Listen, I'm sure you are nice but I'm just not interested." Say it evenly and with consideration for we are all human. I find when a man I don't want around hears this they get the message and they appreciate the kindness. Always start off in a polite/respectful tone. If someone doesn't take the hint I will then say, "Listen, I've been cool, but I'm really not interested. Let's not make things ugly." And I take a polite but matter-of-fact tone. Nothing wrong with you being direct in this way. If she can't/won't take the hint then you decide if being more of a jerk is better or if just getting up and moving is better. Sometimes you have to take the high road to avoid the creepers.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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